A friend of mine has a now-ex whom everyone despised. This made me think: what is the etiquette of inviting a friend and not their relatively serious significant other to a wedding?
Keep in mind this is not a significant other who we just find irritating. This is someone who was emotionally abusive to our friend, and would have ruined the fun for everyone present by being incredibly insulting to us all.
Not everyone on the list is getting "and guest." Only those in serious relationships.
Thanks!
2007-10-13 11:24:33 · 14 answers · asked by Esma 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I am not planning on inviting any exes. This is a hypothetical question, as if someone we know were in a relationship with someone like this CURRENTLY.
2007-10-13 11:30:18 · update #1
In this case you might want to personally deliver the invite and TELL her verbally that she's welcome to bring a date, as long as it isn't Mr. Disgusting. Tell her you want her to have fun, dance, and feel comfortable (i.e., you want her to be able to bring a date) but that you do not want someone who abused her to be at your wedding.
2007-10-13 11:30:00 · answer #1 · answered by lady_phoenix39 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
when setting your guest list it's perfectly fine to apply the "no ring, no bring" rule. Basically unless they are married, engaged, or living together for a long period of time you can leave them off.
The exception to this is if your crowd maybe all older people or family and in this case the single people may only number a handful. In that case you would want to go ahead and let them bring a date of their choice so they had some company and could feel more comfortable.
If you have a huge guest list you might want to be careful as well. If you tell your best friend she has to come alone but you invite your pizza delivery guy she may get upset. I also like to let the wedding party have a date whenever possible.
2007-10-13 13:10:37 · answer #2 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Etiquette calls for that you simply invite the partner, finance, or "huge different" of any one invited on your marriage ceremony. It is immaterial whether or not or now not you realize the man or woman. If you cannot have the funds for to try this, you will have to reconsider your marriage ceremony or your invitation record. By the best way, most effective the individuals named at the internal envelope are invited to the marriage ceremony. This signifies that if you happen to invite a unmarried man or woman, and don't incorporate "and visitor" at the internal envelope, ONLY that one man or woman is invited. They aren't unfastened to convey a date.
2016-09-05 08:07:52 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you invite someone without a guest, don't expect them to stay late at your reception, especially once they see that other people were allowed to bring guests based on your own judgment of what makes a relationship serious.
I would think that the (hypothetical) friend would also take it as a sign that you would not be the type of friend to be truly supportive of her so she would pull away from you which would be a shame since she'll need true friends when the relationship goes bad.
2007-10-13 13:53:03 · answer #4 · answered by Katherine 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I find this fascinating. If someone is so insecure as to not be able to attend a function without an escort/guest I feel very sorry. I mean why do you ,who does not even know the person, have to pay for their presence which might not even be possible or desireable to the person which which they attend, 6 months earlier or later than the date of your wedding. I salute you for not putting' and guest' on the invitation and only HOPE that they will not bring someone else.
2007-10-13 14:12:46 · answer #5 · answered by barthebear 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
If wedding etiquette really interests you, "and guest" is not proper. The idea is, if you love the person enough to invite them, and want to invite their SO, ask them who that person is, get their address, and issue them their own invite.
As to the other, I wouldn't invite someone abusive. If they were engaged to my friend, married to them, or living with them, I'd have to invite them both, or neither. But otherwise, the abusive SO could be excluded.
2007-10-13 13:38:29 · answer #6 · answered by Singinganddancing 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Why would you invite the ex if you are not close and they are no longer in a relationship with you someone you want to invite?
You do have to invite spouses, live together partners, and fiances to the wedding though. To invite one, and not both is rude and goes against etiquette, which is what you asked.
The first paragraph addresses the poor wording of your question, the 2nd answered the question. You have to invite significant others if the person is married, engaged, or living with them whether they are a nice person or not; at least going with etiquette, which is what you asked.
2007-10-13 11:28:29 · answer #7 · answered by Crystal 6 · 2⤊ 3⤋
By etiquette standards you only have to invite those couples who are married, engaged, or live as married people.
2007-10-13 11:44:47 · answer #8 · answered by Poppet 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
While it is not being a good friend to invite one half of an established couple and not the other half, you get to invite who ever you want to your wedding. If the obnoxious jerk is gonna ruin things do not invite them. If the other half of the couple does not want to attend unless you invite the jerk, so be it and wish them well. You do not have to invite a known problemor trouble maker to your wedding, no matter who it is
2007-10-13 13:00:28 · answer #9 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
IF this person is abusive and insulting in any way they do not have to be invited IMO. I would talk to the friend and state why she/he is not allowed to bring relatively serious SO.
2007-10-13 11:38:10 · answer #10 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋