I borrowed my bf's fone for numbers for his surprise party, I am so crap on his fone that I got on to his inbox, anyway i noticed lots of messages from a gurl. I read the first one, big mistake it said " I don't want to be anyone's dirty little secret". the next one said " I don't know why you can't trust her ( me) she should be more worried about you."
Any way I ask in a nice way what the hell it was, he said that he is helping her with a dillema with another guy and thats what he sent her " I dnt want to be anyon...." the second one was that she was anoyed with him cuz "apparently" he had told everyone they work with about it.
How far do I believe him
Confused
2007-10-13 10:25:56 · 55 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I just used someone else's mobile, to text him asking for a drink. He texted back saying "no sorry I'm with someone and very committed" Problem solved whoo!!!
2007-10-17 04:11:55 · update #1
You secretively went through your boyfriend's messages, and you wonder if you can trust him?
You're going to make some lucky man a wonderful wife.
2007-10-13 10:34:09 · answer #1 · answered by jimmeisnerjr 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Trust your gut. From what you've said, I wouldn't trust him. It sounds like a textbook example of cheating. If he's a new bf and you haven't invested a lot into your relationship, you should leave before he has the opportunity to hurt you. If you've invested a lot into your relationship (more than 1 year) you should try to talk to him.
Critically look at your relationship - is he always "too busy to talk to you?" or does he never invite you out with his friends? You definately shouldn't have been reading his messages, that does violate his trust...BUT at the same time, he shouldn't have much to hide. Those texts are quite incriminating...guys don't usually text relationship details with each other - guys don't really talk much about these things...so that does seem a little abnormal.
2007-10-13 10:34:28 · answer #2 · answered by miss_j 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate to say it but I think he maybe cheating, if he hasn't physically as yet then it might be close to it. Does he work late at night? I would suggest you hold fire on dumping him in anger and perhaps do a little detective work. I did exactly this with my guy once and I confronted 'her'. I didn't go guns blazing, I sat her down and told her that it was over between me and him anyway but I just wanted to know for myself if anything had happened. I cried a little to make it look effective (I know its bad doing this) but hey, it worked! She told me everything and I even had it confirmed by a few more people. However, I did advise him to never put me in this position again as it could have been highly embarrassing. Look for different signs, like....has he changed a little in your presence? Does he stay out late? Is he seeing you less regularly? These are things you have to look into before you make a rational decision. Good luck.
2007-10-13 10:49:34 · answer #3 · answered by Poppy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of him unless you want to be strung along or deal with the soap opera antics.
Catch him in a lie and you'll know for sure. I wouldn't trust that guy as far as I could throw him by the sounds of it. I'm a guy, and I think he's cheating. Text messages like that don't lie.
move on.
2007-10-13 10:29:50 · answer #4 · answered by Dirty Randy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hmmm well if i found these messages i wouldn't be too happy! this is definately evidence of a cheater... and you need to remember that cheaters do cover up their tracks, so this "friend" line might be a lie.
only you will be able to tell if he is cheating. deep down are things ok? has he been acting strange - either too nice or too horrid? are you spending less time together? is he cagey?
to me it just seems a little strange that he hasn't mentioned this girl's dilemma before. after all, surely a man would ask a woman's advice on a woman's issue... and surely his partner would be the best person to ask?
2007-10-13 10:34:54 · answer #5 · answered by JB 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm.
I don't know, his answer sounds plausible enough....but I'd still have my suspicions. Keep an eye on him....I don't mean spy on him, but just be aware of what he says and does all the time...
This happened to someone I work with, she was married to the guy. She went through his fone to get names and numbers for a party and found the "cheating"texts. He denied it and denied it. In the end, she confronted the girl herself, who admitted they were "seeing"each other.
My workmate threw him out...they have four young kids...and he said"it saves me the trouble of breaking the news to her gently"....
So think about it.
2007-10-13 10:33:43 · answer #6 · answered by marie m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As far as you can throw him.
This is the type that will sidestep anything and anyone to make sure that one, he still has you in case this other fling goes horribly wrong, you are the safe place to fall.
She has already let you know that you can't trust him, especially when he seems to not trust you, it's like telling on himself without ever saying it.
2007-10-13 10:47:28 · answer #7 · answered by Yankee Micmac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he made those excuses up on the spot. If there was nothing to it, why didnt he tell you he was trying to "help someone out" in the first place? That would of been no big deal if that were REALLY the case.
2007-10-13 10:32:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't believe him. why would it be in his inbox if he had sent it? and how can he explain why she thinks you can't trust him. There's clearly been something going on. i wouldn't trust him if i were you. Watch out for him being sneaky now he knows you're on to him. Such as keeping his fone on vibrate etc. oh and please don't plan a party for him now you know what he's really like.
2007-10-15 03:46:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Besides this, has he ever given you any reason to distrust him ? He knew these messages were on his "fone" so obviously he felt he had nothing to hide. The best thing to do really is go with YOUR gut instinct.
2007-10-13 10:32:02 · answer #10 · answered by Ava 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you believe him? because if you don't then he is cheating I have never been wrong when i suspected, Your mind knows your heart dont wanta believe, Also you could always say look I want to meet her to make sure hes telling the Truth he says no then you know. If you know her already confront her and ask her, tell her what you saw in his phone see if she is nice to you or if she just wants to get away or be mean
2007-10-13 10:39:29 · answer #11 · answered by gassybug 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋