Yesterday my 2 1/2 yr old Domestic shorthair Spot passed away SUDDENLY from a blood clot in his heart. ZERO warning signs, and I awoke to the sounds of my 2 yr old Callico Lexi yelping and trying to wake me up. Baffled, I went out in the living room, didn't see Spot. Then lying right in the middle of our kitchen floor there he was. He sadly passed away in the middle of the night.
Fast forward to late last night: Lexi meows ALOT now, is searching nearly every room for her beloved playmate, but sadly he is up in kitty cat Heaven. I "talked" to her telling her that her "step brother" is in a better place now. But she insists on clinging to my side now more than ever, she used to never sleep next to me and my girlfriend, and now she will lie next to me on my pillow. I can tell (I know, this sounds dumb) that she is depressed, and that she was "at Spot's side" when he passed away. What can I do to help her?
2007-10-13 08:51:41 · 15 answers · asked by Greddy 2 in Pets ➔ Cats
I will end up getting another cat. Question is... how long after his passing do I go out and get one?
2007-10-13 09:16:02 · update #1
My heartfelt sympathy to you and Lexi. Your Lexi is grieving, cats do grieve the loss of a companion.
I know what you are talking about. In July, my oldest cat crossed the bridge after a fierce battle with kidney failure. Maybelle was 17 years old and my youngest cat, Holstein, is 7 years old. They were constant companions. Maybelle was very motherly and would groom everyone in the home, including the Chihuahua.
After she became ill, Holstein wouldn't leave her side. I could always tell if she was having a particularly bad day, because Holstein would 'guard' her. Especially in those last few days. It has been two months now and he is still looking for her.
I give him lots of extra attention. He has his moments just like anyone grieving. Some days he is okay and some days I can't move because he wants to be clingy. He loves to sit on my lap, especially at the computer and sleeps curled next to me, has to be touching me. He has always been talkative, but he seems to fuss at me sometimes. He sits in the window and watches for me to come home from work. I can't groom him like Maybelle did, but when he seems to really need it, I rub my face against his and that seems to comfort him.
One mistake I made was to put away Maybelle's things too fast. I had a table set up with extra towels and baby blankets where her food and water dishes were and where I could give her IV fluids. She had lost so much weight, so I kept plenty of padding for her to lie on, plus she could see the bird and squirrel feeders from the window at this table. I came back from taking her to the crematorium and put everything away. It upset all the cats! So I put everything back in place and have moved one thing at a time. Only a food dish remains where Holstein eats.
My suggestion is to give Lexi extra attention. Play with her more, give her extra treats and toys. Talk to her in a normal voice. Don't make changes in the home too fast, just as grief counselors advise when you are dealing with a human loss.
Here are some links about cats grieving the loss of a companion cat. I hope they help.
Purrs and prayers for you and Lexi.
2007-10-13 10:17:55 · answer #1 · answered by Patty O 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Cats can and do go into depression if they've lost an owner or a cat friend.
Give her a lot of attention, and physical contact. Carry her around a bit every day. She doesn't understand what happened. If she's still depressed in 2 weeks that's the time to introduce a new cat as a companion--it'll give her something to focus on and help pull her out of it.
2007-10-13 11:51:35 · answer #2 · answered by Elaine M 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Animals grieve in the same was we do I think only it is worse because they can't voice their feelings. I don't think they understand death only that their playmate is gone. They need time to adjust just like we do and if he loves you a lot then he will cling more thinking that he might lose you too. Just be with him as much as possible and I would get him a new playmate, preferably a younger kitten, as soon as possible. It will help him get over that lonely feeling much faster. If you had blankets for them or beds for them you should remove the one with the other cats scent and get a new one for the new cat.
I am very sorry for your loss - Good luck to you
2007-10-13 09:42:22 · answer #3 · answered by mn lady 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say, get her another cat companion. We had two Oriental Shorthair cats that were companions. One had terrible allergies for three years. We finally had to send him back to the breeder in the desert where there are less allergens. Our other cat went nuts running around the house screaming for a week, so we got him a little Siamese companion and he is happy as can be. He totally forgot about the other guy and things are back to normal. Some cats need a companion, some don't. Sounds like yours does. Good luck.
2007-10-13 09:08:49 · answer #4 · answered by Byrd 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
After 6mo Izzy passed (born brain damaged), 9mo Xander went nuts trying to find him and kept calling for him. I got 2mo Mindy a couple days later and while Xander knows that she isn't Izzy, (Mindy-girl, Izzy-boy, Xander-dumb-but-not-that-dumb) he's doing better than he did the first day.
If you're not getting another kitty right away, you'll have to show Lexi a lot more love. She probably watched it happen, and may be afraid herself. Who knows what really goes on in Kitty brains?
2007-10-13 09:43:05 · answer #5 · answered by Chief High Commander, UAN 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sadly enough probably nothing. It's just like with us only time will heal these things. She does probably have the need to be especially close to you now. Try giving her extra attention; talk to her reassuringly, cuddle with her and play with her more. It is common for cats to go through a period of depression especially if they are closely bonded.
That must have been quite a shock. I'm sorry for your loss :(
2007-10-13 09:04:11 · answer #6 · answered by Squeek E 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry for the loss of your cat. It must be heartbreaking for everyone, especially as he was so young.
Cats do grieve when a close companion dies. She is searching and calling for him, because she misses him. Being clingy is her way of making sure that nothing happens to you and she probably found comfort from sleeping close to you . She needs lots of reassurance and attention from you at the moment. Keep an eye on her to make sure that she carries on eating, as loss of appetite can be a symptom of depression.
The article "When Cats Grieve" is a very good one and I hope it will help both you and your cat.
http://www.messybeast.com/cat-grief.htm
2007-10-13 09:42:30 · answer #7 · answered by Michele the Louis Wain cat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's difficult for all of you and especially poor Lexi as she can't talk out her feelings.
You can get homeopathic Ignatia pellets from a health foods store. That is specific for grief and the 30C is just fine.
Give her one pellet a day (not with food) for maybe three days. You can dissolve one in a dropperful of distilled water and give it that way. The humans can just dissolve a pellet in your mouth. You can do no harm to yourself or the cat. Just give or take it as long as you are feeling bad.
The pellets will be less than $10 and they will help everyone with the grief.
2007-10-13 09:30:40 · answer #8 · answered by old cat lady 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I have two little noodles that love each other too, doggies that is! and I know how you feel, I think we would all die together if one of us died, but I believe that the sooner you get a new one the better, as they do not have the type of minds we as humans have and they should adapt quickly.
as I would think about the fact that the are lonely and need another kitty to relate too, along with you and your girlfriend, good luck!
2007-10-13 11:00:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
firstly, Im sorry for your loss :(
We lost our beloved Tabitha some time back now, and my baby siamese was beside himself, wailing the place down and continually looking for her...I only waited 2 months before I got another playmate for him...and within weeks...my once sad siamese...was now a happy lad...so now I have 2 maniac siameses LOL
2007-10-13 09:23:18 · answer #10 · answered by wendy j 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋