My step brother is a total screw up. He's 20, and he never got through high school because of drugs and alcohol. Because of that and his habits of stealing everything he sees, my mom and step dad kicked him out. He moved in with his mom and she ended up kicking him out because he stole her tv and radio and kept doing drugs. so my mom and step dad decided to give him one more chance because he had no place to live. But last night he came in the house totally drunk to where he could barely walk and he started calling my mom every name in the book and he started threatining her. My mom wants to kick him out but i'm scared hes going to get violent with her. My dad is at work and she will be the only one home with my step brother. What should i do? Should i call the cops?
2007-10-13 08:01:18 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
change the locks immediately!
If he breaks in, be prepared to call 911 - have cell phone handy in case you must leave the area for safety.
tomorrow, find a way to introduce your Mom (and others) to "tough love"
2007-10-13 08:09:04 · answer #1 · answered by dwhelper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read these other posts. I agree with most of them.
Your mom needs to take some steps to protect the house and herself and you.
Yes, call the cops if he is beating on the door!
She needs to call a locksmith and have all the locks changed out. Get the kind of locks that can't be bumped. She also needs to put a deadbolt lock on her bedroom door, and preferably one closet (to turn it into a safe). My parents did this after my brother got us robbed because he kept yapping about what all was in the house, its location and everything else, while he was at some party. It is a standard in all our houses.
If dad is usually away when the druggie shows up, then she needs to lock-up, and take you, and go check into a hotel for a few days. Notify the police that this is what you are doing so they can arrange for a cruiser to come by the house a little more frequently.
Yes, file a restraining order... just to get it onto the records... but don't expect it to have any meaning to a messed-up druggie. You just need something established so the police with have something to work with.
You cannot EVER trust an addict... their whole mindset (if you can call it that) is wrapped around doing whatever it takes to get their next fix.
Your dad has his head up his fanny. Your mother needs to step into her power. The mama rules. The mama is the ultimate authority. If the mama isn't happy, then NOBODY is happy.
2007-10-13 08:33:32 · answer #2 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
DEFINATELY call the police>> He could be dangerous while he is on drugs and with the combination of doing both makes it even worse.
I was in a similar situation. He needs serious help and he will more than likely not listen to anyone but the people he is hanging around with.
It is going to take tough love and him losing everything and everyone around him that loves him to straighten him out. Until he wakes up and realizes where he going in life there is not too much you or your family can do.
Me and my situation when I was going thru the same thing took alot of prayers. My signicant other almost lost his life as well as everything we owned. He woke up and has been cleaned for two years now. We are getting things back in order now and am happy to say that he apologizes to me each and every day still.
Best of luck to you and your family. My prayers are with you all.
2007-10-13 08:18:58 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I AM WRITING THIS IN CAPS BECAUSE IT'S SERIOUS, DEADLY SERIOUS, CALL THE COPS RIGHT NOW! HE CAN KILL BOTH YOUR MOM AND YOU. Tell her not to throw him out until the cops come, keep him calm and placate him and what I mean by that is just tell him what he wants to hear whether you mean it or not until you are safe.
Your Mom needs to throw him out and get an order of protection against him. Change the locks, your phone number and let go and let God. You are not dealing with him any longer, you are dealing with the chemicals that are changing the biology of his brain. He needs to hit bottom and I mean bottom before he decides to live or die. Neither his parent or your mom can make that decision for him, he does.
Get in touch with the authorities and express your concerns, get some counseling for yourself and your parents (Step Parent) to get the strength you will need to do what must be done. Granted, it won't be easy and he'll beg and say he will change but he won't until he's been in treatment, with or without you guys.
You need to be a united front and if your Step Dad takes him back your mom needs to take you and leave this awful situation. From your e-mail it's dangerous and you know it and so does she. She needs to protect you first and foremost, your health and welfare is the only thing she should care about.
Please show this to your mom when he's gone, help her with the strength she will need to do what may have to be done. You are her baby as is your step brother to his father but if he's out of control he will destroy not only himself but you and your mom too.
Good luck and God bless, I am praying for you.
2007-10-13 08:14:46 · answer #4 · answered by marianlaughs 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your stepbrother is a loser. Call his dad. His dad might be angry with you if you call the cops. I think the cops should only be called into family situations in the most extreme cases. The lad probably needs to sleep it off.
2007-10-13 08:06:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anthony F 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋