I'm 31 and I have an 11yr old.I'm finally ready to go back to school now that she has a little age on her.BUT,how can I still manage to work pt and go to school and be a parent?I'm so ready for school.I want to go back for my M.S.N Masters in Science in Nursing,so I can just get it over with.But I'm afraid I spoiled my daughter to much because the school is right up the street yet I take her to school and pick her up everyday.My friends say make her a lock in key baby but I'm to afraid.Although she looks 15.Any suggestions?I don't want to keep putting my schooling off.
2007-10-13 03:55:48 · 14 answers · asked by dccuttie75 6 in Education & Reference ➔ Other - Education
You can do it, its just time to talk to your daughter and let her know what it is that's on your mind, Communicating is the key to most relationships so just talk to your daughter... Its worth a try!
2007-10-13 04:00:04 · answer #1 · answered by vbliss121 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Children find the most trouble in the hours between the end of school and when their parents get out of work. Eleven is too young (especially if she looks 15!) to be expected to make responsible decisions on her own.
Most Masters Programs (especially nursing) try to have flexible or convenient schedules because they cater to working adults. Consider returning to school and work part time at least at first. Most importantly, don't leave your daughter home alone regularly. Find her a good after-school program, class or club to attend while you are out of the house. Or arrange with her friends' parents to trade after-school care for sleepovers so they can have a night off.
2007-10-13 11:07:45 · answer #2 · answered by joyous4 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Coming from my experience as a child, I think eleven is much too young for lock and key. Can you plan your school schedule to coincide with hers? You're going back to college, they should have classes during the day...
If you haven't done this already, there are programs for single mothers where they will pay the rent which will allow you to go back to school while not working as much.
If she's eleven and looks fifteen then you definitely shouldn't let her be a lock and key kid.
Conceivably, how long would she be at home before you got there?
2007-10-13 11:01:24 · answer #3 · answered by 1110011100 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I raised my child from age 1 alone; her father walked out the door one day seeking his fortune and we haven't seen him in 45 years. If you want to do it you will do it. Make good choices about someone to be a friend and companion to your daughter while you are not there; do not call it baby sitter.
you ... concentrate on your goal. what good does it do this child if she grows up hearing how you "sacrificed" for her; that will only lay a guilt trip on her and no one needs that.
she will survive if she has been raised properly. When it comes to the boys you are obviously worried about, tell her what I told my son, who had dogs all his life.
You can either choose to be a young lady, or you can choose to be a Dog. That is why you were born with the ability to reason and think about your choices, and a dog wasn't.
Kids usually make the right choice if raised properly. But don't leave her alone ina house locked in that is just stupid.
2007-10-13 11:02:46 · answer #4 · answered by smileymduke 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
are you sure your eleven year old is mature enough to be left alone? in a lot of places (especially US) it is ILLEGAL to leave any child under 13 unsupervised (check laws in YOUR location).
having said that, you may want to consider having her stay with a trusted friend or relative for the few hours that you are apart from her, or you can take her with you to class, as long as she doesn't cause a disruption to other students.
if all else fails, consider hiring her to do things for you that you won't have time for (typing your course notes or something like that). It will allow her to feel like she is a help and that you count on her, it could be a big ego boost, and allow you to keep a closer eye on her. but don't throw her in and forget it, kind of ease her into it. hope this helps.
good luck.
2007-10-13 11:05:54 · answer #5 · answered by The GA Flygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you could get a family member to watch her on the evening until you get home , you could arrange for her to go to a friends after school .Actually thinking about it i;m 19 now, and i had my 1st front door key at about 11 , 7th grade i think, and i used to stay home alone all the time , i used to just lock the doors and have a list of numbers incase of emergancy. Surley she can understand aswell you both have lives , if that dusnt work maybe you could get her involve din a afterschool club , or sumthing like karate , brownies , cheerleading , dance lesson , music lessons, ntil you can get home
good luck xx
2007-10-13 11:01:03 · answer #6 · answered by Katy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have an 11 year old also. Your daughter is old enough to understand that her mother wants to make things "better" for the two of you, and in order to do this you want to continue your schooling (tell her just like she is in school, you need to go back to school to finish what you started). Tell her in the end it will make for a better life for both of you. Try to get her in an after-school care program, and she'll be occupied until you can get there to get her. The after school programs (if they have one) aren't that expensive.
It will be an adjustment for her, just as it will be for you, but she'll be fine. I can promise you that. Tell her you need for her to be "grown up" about this if she give you any whining, and just be reassuring to her. They are smarter then we think at this age. You might be pleasantly surprised.
So long as you can figure out something that you can do with her while you go to school, don't feel guilty about it. She will survive and get used to it. You cannot put yourself on the back burner just to spare her feelings. Life is full of ups and downs, and this will be a good time for her to learn that. At this age you should be trying to teach her about responsibility and such, and here's a good start.
I wish you THE BEST OF LUCK, and hooray for you that you want to go back to school and better yourself. So many people don't. Be proud of yourself, and do what you have to do to work this out. She'll be fine!!
GO GET 'EM GIRL!!! ;o)
2007-10-13 11:05:34 · answer #7 · answered by MrsCrabs 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take one class at a time so you can still spend time with her and be involved in activities with her. but explain to your daughter why you are returing back to school. Show her your work. You may think that she would not understand, but it you talk to her and tell her why, she'll respect and appreciate you even more!
Go to school part time, find time to balance work and school. Ex: You know your daughter has a soccer meet. You can take your homework there and be there to watch her. , you can also do your homework on your lunch break.
Hope this helps you! and congradulations on going back to school!
2007-10-13 11:03:09 · answer #8 · answered by tropikanagirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The key is to work your schooling around your regular schedule. See if there are any after school programs that she can attend. Most businesses are now "continuing education" friendly. You could take a morning class, work until her after school program is done and then spend the evening doing your homework together. It will take you longer to get your degree but in the end you'll be happier.
2007-10-13 11:00:45 · answer #9 · answered by Wicked 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hi,
I'm 35 and a single dad of an 11 year old. and in college, I don't know if the answer to your question is coming to late for you but here it goes. the answer is easy its scheduling. besides it is a lot easier for single mothers to find funds for college so if you do work you can cut back on that quite a bit.
good luck to you
2007-10-19 23:22:21 · answer #10 · answered by jessie b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋