I am 17 years old and I am barely on my first boyfriend, I just lost my virginity and that's good according to most girls I know. I have never been to a party and just barely started going to the movies thanks to my boyfriend. When we go to the movies I have to bring a cell phone so my mom could keep in contact and I understand that but we see a early movie and when it's over my mom wants me right back home to stay for the rest of the day. I don't have a curfew but when ever I leave she wants me to come back right away. If I'm borded then I just have to deal with it because my mom accuses me of sneaking off to motels with my boyfriend when I do leave. I got a job and she wants 150 a month and she doesn't even have a job cause my dad works. She spends money on useless things and I think I shouldn't have to pay rent until 18. She wants to keep count of my money and every little thing I do. I'm I wrong to feel disapointed and unwanted. I'm 18 in 2 wks and ready to move.I'm not happy
2007-10-12 17:49:25 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
you are in critical age you must obey your mom she will advise you will make her as afriend she has many previous experience that you can learn
2007-10-12 17:57:48 · answer #1 · answered by samy n 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you're not wrong to feel unwanted and disappointed. Your mom is just really overprotective... so you can't really blame her. My mom was also that way... very strick. If you're not happy, then it's not a bad idea to move out. But remember you might want to consider staying at home so you can save up some money to live on your own. It's pretty expensive to live on your own. So you may just want to bare in dealing with your mom for a while longer. I know it sucks... and I want to move out too, but I don't have enough money yet. I'm even a few years older than you too.
2007-10-12 17:58:34 · answer #2 · answered by rosezz50 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mom is blowing any money you give her? She isn't putting it into a savings account for you? Go open a bank account and start putting the money into it, except for a little bit of running money.
If she wants to see your paycheck stub... you lose it on the way home. If she demands $150, say "I'm sorry but I've had to spend my time studying for finals, so I don't have any money to give you." You might hand her $10 just so she walks away with something in her hand.
If she threatens to drag your dad into it, be proactive about it. Ask him to walk around the block with you and tell him yourself that you are saving your money. You will need it to put a deposit on an apartment. See if you can soak your dad for matching funds for such a deposit.
Your mom's psycho control trip isn't washing at all. You are too old to be dealing with that. Quit caving to her blackmail. This is about growing up and establishing boundaries.
Start screening your cell phone calls and don't pick up if your mom is calling... unless you want to.
2007-10-12 18:07:52 · answer #3 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're 18 in 2 weeks girl, JUMP AROUND, DANCE IN CIRCLES, DO A BACKFLIP. In two weeks, 14 days... you will be an adult. That is SO close, i wouldn't even be on here asking this question... i would be trying to look for a dorm/rent/small apartment to move into. You're unhappy, so why not?
Honestly, if you just lost your virginity to impress your girl friends.. i can tell you that really isn't cool or good. You can NEVER take back your virginity, that's why people save it for marriage. They save it for the person who they care trust with their entire heart, someone they KNOW who's going to be with them forever. You're only boyfriend/girlfriend which means he can leave at any point and when he leaves he takes your virginity with him.
Your mom is just protective and loves you. But you're right, you shouldn't HAVE to give your money so she can just blow it on herself... so talk to her about it. The fact is, she's your mother and as long as you stand beneath her roof you abide by her rules.
2007-10-12 18:09:10 · answer #4 · answered by Goose Feet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. You are in a crappy situation! Your mom sounds like a control freak with insane demands. I don't know what you can do about it... If it were me, I'd keep the peace and do what she wants for the next year. You are what... a Senior in high school? ONLY ONE MORE YEAR!!
2007-10-12 17:53:35 · answer #5 · answered by Cydney - 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK YOU'RE ON YOUR 1ST BOYFRIEND AND LOST YOUR VIRGINITY?? UM...THATS NOT GOOD. WELL IF YOU'RE OFF HAVING SEX WITH HIM THEN OBVIOUSLY YOUR MOM IS RIGHT ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE DOING WHEN YOU'RE NOT AROUND. CORRECT? MAYBE YOU SHOULD FOCUS MORE ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR MOTHER INSTEAD OF TRYING TO GET LAID AND WORRY ABOUT WHAT YOUR FRIENDS THINK ABOUT HOW OLD YOU ARE WHEN YOU GET LAID. ITS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. AND IF YOU ARE HAVING SEX, PLEASE BE SURE YOU'RE USING BIRTH CONTROL. THE LAST THING THE WORLD NEEDS IS ANOTHER IDIOT TEENAGE PREGNANCY.
2007-10-12 18:17:01 · answer #6 · answered by abominusprime 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having sex & losing your virginity is the single most important decision in any girl's life AND FOR THAT MATTER FOR ANY BOY AS WELL. But today, not may girls would agree with that. The common belief among them is that they can do it with just about anyone they chose or like without
considering the immediate & future consequences - physical, emotional & psychological. I dont know if they are right by claiming their right to be sexually active as & when they think they are ready for sex. However I do know this for a fact that you may or may not regret losing your virginity to
someone with whom you dont end up spending your life with but YOU WILL DEFINITELY NEVER regret it if you dont lose it to the person with whom you are not sure of ending up with, for the rest of your life. Its like gambling. You may win or you may lose - LOSE IT ALL! But if you dont gamble & wait
& exercise self control you will surely NEVER LOSE. To wait will never hurt .... but to not wait may result in lifelong apathy. Imagine you lost it to someone who you think desrves it but later in life if you find the TRUE LOVE .... someone who would have you just as you are. Dont tell me that you
would not hate yourself for not waiting for this wonderfuly loving man who is going to love u forever & treat you like an angel.
Lets assume Ms. X finds Mr. Y.
OPTION1 = X loses it to Y. Here are the scenarios that can happen.
Scenario1 - Y values X forever & live happily ever after. RESULT= WIN WIN. But they will only get to know, in years to come, whether they deserved each other.
Scenario2 - Y ditches X. X finds out that all he ever wanted was to put it in her. a WIN or LOSE OPTION. RESULT= Immeasurable LOSS
OPTION1 = X waits till marriage or for couple of years before she does it with Y. Here are the scenarios that can happen.
Scenario1 - Y understand X & plays along. They wait & do it after kowing each other for a long time & make it a very special moment to be treasured forever.
Scenario1 Part 1 - They end up together. RESULT = WIN WIN WIN. Best levels of understanding & mutual harmony. Great Great respect will be built amongst the two. Life is definitely going to be VERY VERY smooth.
Scenario1 Part 1 - They get separated willingly after SAY 3 years RESULT = LOSS & WIN. Loss, because you lost him after being able to atay together for so long.
WIN because although you will not be a virgin for your life partner (next man) but you will never regret it much becuase in this scenario you did not lose your virginity instead you made it very very special moment. NO GUILT!
Scenario2 - Y ditches X. And they get separated. No harm done. Because if the Man ends the relationship only because he could not put it in you then he was not worth it. YOU NOT JUST SAVED YOUR VIRGINITY. YOu saved your life & more importantly you saved the life of that someone who
will first want to get in to your heart & then make luv to you in most special way which makes you feel like a pricess.
NOW, YOU choose what is it that you want to do. Beleive me losing your virginity & regretting is not the worst part. You will learn to live with it. BUt what you will not be able to live with is when someone loves you more than you would have ever imagined, when someone cares for you treats you not
as a piece of flesh but as a part of his own soul makes you feel the most valuable & most lovable creature on earth ..... & you realize that you wished you had not done with anyone but ONLY & ONLY with this one man ...... THIS IS WAHT YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO LIVE WITH....
PICK WHAT YOU WANT ... CHOICE IS YOURS but never blame it on someone else or the so called pressures, circumsatnces.
LASTLY, EVEN IF YOU DO FIND THAT SOMEONE SPECIAL & WERE FOOLISH & SELFISH ENOUGH NOT TO LOOSE YOUR VIRGINITY TO A LOSER ...... then just to reciprocate & respect his love, NEVER EVER blame or curse him for feeling hurt that you did not valued yourself as much as he is valuing you now. The fact is that the more he loves you the more strongly he feels for you the more hurt he will be. If you really want to help him & also want to love him back as much as he loves you then take him in to your arms with all his hurt & tears. kill his guilt for feeling hurt AND YOU WILL SEE MAGIC! Else verybody is DOOMED for destruction. Believ me if you leave him with his pain alone & not love him back even when he feels hurts about your past ..... this man will never live in peace nor will he die in peace. He may never show it to you that he is hurt but I CAN GAURATEE that if he gets to live again he would want to be the first in your life & I am sure you would want that too. SO WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU!
THAT SEX IS VERY VERY SPECIAL WHEN DONE WITH THAT VERY VERY SPECIAL. AND NOT EVERYONE IS VERY VERY VERY SPECIAL. FOR EACH ONE OF US THERE IS ONLY ONE VERY VERY SPECIAL.
WHATEVER YOU DO PRAY THAT BY NO ACTIONS OF YOURS DO YOU GIVE A LIFE LONG UNBEARABLE PAIN TO A HEART WHO WAS CREATED TO LOVE A HEART WHICH IS INCAPABLE TO HATE YOU TO HEART WHICH CAN ONLY FEEL HURT BUT NEVER HURT YOU.
ALL THE BEST!
2007-10-17 23:24:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋