Cat behavior issues.. PLEASE HELP!!!!?

Question

I have a 3 yr old full grown female long hrd. cat. She use to live alone, so i got a male kitten in hopes to provide her w company. At first it tookawhile forher to except it, but she soon ended up liking the kitten, took him under her wing, and so on........ 2 weeks ago I had him neutered and brought him home that same day. She flipped out. She absolutely hates him and me now. Anytime he comes near, trys to eat, or even comes close to me she hisses, trys to bite.....she is seriously outta control!!! My roommate and I tryed the water bottle thing and the whole dominance thing where u lay themon there sides face to face till they calm down....we're gettin no where with that. So now, she's in the taxi carrier when she des it cuz we have no idea what to do, and we feel bad for being the ones that are having to do this. Especially bc the whole perpose was to get her a friend so she wouldn'tbe all depressed all the time anymore. gettin rid of the kitten is not an issue at this point.. HELP

Answer 1

She probably thought you got rid of the first kitten and brought home a new one when he came back from the vet smelling different. Right now it sounds like your cat thinks she's being replaced and is doing her best to keep that from happening. Your cat sounds really riled up and you need to take a few steps back to remedy it. (You can't let the older cat keep the kitten from eating or using the litter box, this will just result in problems with the kitten)

1st: Separate the cats for at least a few days. Put the kitten in the bathroom with food, water, toys, bed and litter box. Keep the door closed.

2nd:Put a dab of vanilla on both cats, on the back between the shoulder blades and further down right before the tail. This will make them both smell the same. Refresh it every 2-3 days.

3rd: Take a towel and rub it on both cat so their scents are mixed together. Put the towel where your 3 yr old likes to lay. It will get her used to the scent.

4th: After the 2nd start leaving the door open a crack so they can smell each other, play "footsie" under the door, but no more. Remain at this step until all the hissing & growling has stopped.

5th: On the 4th day try introducing them again. Let your grown cat make the first moves. Try not to show affection to the kitten in front of the older one until you see some progress. If the older cat used to sleep with you don't let the new kitten sleep with you for now. Make sure you have at least two litter boxes that are not in the same room.

The whole idea with the water bottle is that the spray comes from a distance so your cat doesn't associate you with this punishment. But it sounds like she already associates you with this bad thing so I would stop with the water bottle. I think the "lay them on their sides face to face until they calm down" is a Dog Whisperer thing. Cat's don't like to be restrained or forced and will resent you for it.

Hope this helps.

Answer 2

Then this is anxiety related behavior. Couple of things you can try: a) CatAttract Cat Litter (cats can't help, but want to pee in it) b) Rescue Remedy (homeopathic remedy to ease anxiety - 30 drops per cup of water each day) c) Feliway spray and diffusers. They contain natural pheromones that calm the kitty down. Use the spray according to directions and put a diffuser in every room that she has access to. Also - confine her to one room for now. She needs to be retrained for about 8 weeks. Get that diffuser and the other stuff and keep her in there for that time. Then allow her back out (only if she uses her litterbox faithfully) and keep all rooms closed at first and gradually open one after the other (if she uses the litterbox). If all that doesn't work, get her Amitrypteline. That's an anti anxiety drug and will work wonders.

Answer 3

It's very common when one cat returns from a trip to the vet that the other cat freaks out on their return. Cats rely heavily on their sense of smell, and your male cat smells of the vet clinic and that's why she didn't recognise him.

I'm sorry, but whomever advised you to do the "dominance thing" knows nothing about cats. Laying on their sides facing each other is what cats do when they are about to have a really serious fight. Laying down during a fight is not a submissive gesture in cat behaviour, it's aggressive and means "I'm here - all four claws & teeth ready to attack".

The best thing you can do is confine the male to a separate room and follow the advice given to you by Squeek E, who clearly does understand cat behaviour. After a few days he will pick up the scent of your home and your female will be much more tolerant of him.

Whatever you do, don't rush things, let your female dictate the pace.

Answer 4

The same thing happened with my cats about 6 yrs ago,it took the female cat about a month before she started to except him again so don't panick just yet.I heard that it's a good idea to play with both cats at the same time but not so they are in competition. maybe because they can get used to being in each others space and they will be focused on you and not each other.
hope this helps

Answer 5

He smells different, but he'll smell better when a few days go by.

The dominance thing only works with dogs, I think you just made it worse for her to hold her down nose to nose. Cats don't respond to dog training, they're the wrong species.

Give her time. Possibly give him a bath to get the vet smells off him. But don't stress her out any further than she already is.

Answer 6

first of all.....NEVER do a "dominance" move with a cat
they are NOT pack animals and don't understand this (not that it should be used on dogs either, but i wont go there)

its quite possible that after his stay at the vets, he smelled like OTHER cats.

even tho he may not smell like it anymore, she has possibly become very put-off by him (since now she has been squirted, rolled over, and timed-out after being in his presence).

if it were me i would:
-bathe him
-get a warm, wet , washcloth, and wipe ur older cat with it. then, when the boy is dry, wipe him with it to get her scent on him
-keep them seperated (like him in the bathroom) for a re-introduction for up to 2 wks
-do NOT leave them alone at any point.
-while re-introducing him, have someone hold him in the room while the other person feeds her FAVORITE treats (like even chicken or tuna) to her so she associates GOOD things with him (instead of those bad things that have happened recently)
-make sure she still gets private attention (like petting or playing in another room) along with group play once they have been re-introduced


good luck

Answer 7

My guess is that when he came home he was full of new smells......strangers, other cats..medicines..and he probably smelled different from being neutered.

Your kitty just needs to get used to him again....she will..

I don't think holding her down will make things better..that works for dogs..not cats...and punishing her for doing something natural is unfair...it could make her worse...just give her lots of attention and it will probably blow over in time.

Answer 8

mabe he has done somethig to upset her when i fist brought my kitten home my other cat loved her to bits but all she wanted to do was jump on her and play so she got pissed off and now she doesnt like my kitten that much your cat prob needs so time to get used to him again after all when you desex an animal they act diff coz they dont have the hormones any more im sorry if i havent been much help

Answer 9

sounds like she doesn't like his smell from coming from the vet. Give him a bath once he's recovered from the nuetering and give her one too, using the same kitty shampoo...then they will have the same scent.