I realize that most full time jobs are going to be from 8-5, 9-5 M-F. My baby is almost 3 months and Im ready to start going back to work. In order for me to bring home any income and pay for daycare, I will have to work full time. But I feel so bad to have to leave my baby in daycare for 9 to 10 hrs a day. How do parents cope with this?
2007-10-12 08:53:13 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You know what, if you really have issues with leaving your baby in daycare, then you need to re-evalute the need for having to work. Do you have a husband who's bringing in an income? When I added up all the expenses of working, fuel, wardrobe, lunches, daycare, financially it still didn't make enough sense for me to work. The little bit that I would have made after all the expenses JUST WASN'T WORTH having my baby with strangers all day long.
This is one of those times when making sacrifices and leaning on family will pay off in spades....why in the world would you have a child and plan to leave them with strangers all day long? TRUST YOUR GUT....you feel uneasy for a reason.
2007-10-12 09:21:31 · answer #1 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was very depressed when I first had to put my children in daycare, however it was one of those things in life I knew I just had to learn to cope with.
I just made sure that I found the daycare that was right for us. I knew I didn't want a public daycare, because I had used one for a short time with my oldest, and was not happy with the care. I knew that there were alot of good public daycares, but due to my one bad experience, didn't want to go down that road again. Since then I have only used private home daycares, that have a small adult to child ratio. I asked around, and found out that one of my close neighbors mother watches kids in her home. She has turned out to be like a 3rd grandma to my daughter. She has been doing it for a long time (over 25 yrs) and I know it isn't just a job to her, she just loves kids. Next to me, that is the next best thing for my daughter.
Perhaps you could look into someone like that. You can contact your cities chamber of commerce, and see who in your area is a registered in home daycare provider. Or ask friends and relatives. If you are comfortable with the person who watches your baby, you will be less upset with leaving him/her.
2007-10-12 09:11:42 · answer #2 · answered by Pink Cowgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I looked at about a dozen centers before choosing the best possible place for my baby. Even though I was very comfortable with my decision on center and the decision to continue working, I still spent my first day back at work crying at my desk. But - when I picked up my baby at the end of the day, she was smiling at having a great time. She was 6 weeks old. I loosened up after that. Every time I came to pick her up, she was happy and it gave me so much relief to know that her teachers were taking great care of her and she was safe. Eventually you just get over it and embrace the fact that someone else is caring for your child and it is good for your child to experience other people and environments.
My child started at 6 weeks. Here are a couple of tips:
1) Can someone else drop off the baby, and you'll pick her up? At least in the beginning, it is nice to have someone do the hard part of leaving her with the caregiver. You take the reassuring job of picking up your happy child.
2) Are you breastfeeding? If so, try to pump at work at least every 3 hours. This was a great way for me to take a break and it made me feel like I didn't abandon her all day, as I was still taking time out to provide her meals.
3) Try not to check in too much at the center. You don't want to start obsessing about every little thing and you don't want to make it a habit that your child expects. If you know you chose a good, safe place you shouldn't need to check in very often.
4) When you pick up your child, spend some time talking to and building relationships with your caregiver. They appreciate the personal relationship - and they also appreciate he occasional gift. I have given gift cards, flowers, plants, candies, and other goodies. I feel better knowing that the teacher knows I appreciate her and that we are communicatiing daily.
Good luck!
2007-10-12 10:43:38 · answer #3 · answered by Rachel Sunnyvale 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's really hard at first but If you find a day care that you feel comfortable with then it eventually gets easier.
My first son didn't go to daycare until he was 4 yrs old, my second son was 10 wks and my 3rd son was 7 wks.
The 2 youngest went to the same day care and it was around the corner from my job. I stopped in during lunch and whenever I could take a 20 minute break and eventually felt comfortable with the place.
It's really hard but they teach them so much and they develop better socially.
2007-10-12 09:12:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to fully trust 100% the daycare provider. I personally couldn't, the centers were all full and the sitters who'd come to my home were psycho. Even tho I left my govt job and benefit, I couldn't risk it if something happened I'd never live with myself. I know if I had someone I could trust and that I liked I'd of been more comfortable leaving my child. I don't know how people just can dump their kid at a center without fully researching
2007-10-12 11:06:23 · answer #5 · answered by Yummy♥Mummy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is completely normal for you to feel like this. The best thing you can do is be informed about the decision that you make. Also check with your community as there are programs to help you pay for childcare. Once you have seen a few places and met the people that are going to watch over your little one you will feel better. I went through the same thing and I know that it is hard because you are so attached but this is the best age that you can out them in childcare because they will get used to having to go and they will soon find out that even when you go. You will always come back to get them. Just go on a few babysitting interviews find out what is important to you and try them out. It should be o.k. It might be harder on you than on your child. Good Luck!!!!!!!!!
2007-10-12 09:08:21 · answer #6 · answered by gabrielaqlejandra 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is so hard especially when they are only months but its something you have to do just make sure its a safe place. You might be able to go during your lunch hour and see the baby for a while but remember that its quality time not quantity what counts. Just make sure you let your baby know how much you love him/her. Make all the time your with the baby worth it.
2007-10-12 09:34:34 · answer #7 · answered by **aki** 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can get childcare subsidy. It is very difficult to find a daycare that takes babies, because they require alot of care. Are you not on Maternity leave? You get up to a year for Maternity leave. You are going to have to do a lot of research in your area, what daycares take babies, because there aren't many.
2007-10-12 09:13:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just make sure you have a safe nurturing place for your baby where she will get the care and attention she needs. See if you can get a place close to your work, then you can pop out at lunch to check on her each day.
Also make time in the evening to give her some TLC and on weekends.
Don't feel guilty about doing this, millions of parents do.
2007-10-12 09:02:08 · answer #9 · answered by flyingdove 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋