ok last month on the first , my cousin was suppossed to leave to her home in florida. she and her child's father ended up getting in an argument he took her child said he was not going to return her and made her loose her flight. he eventually gave her child back but now she was unable to fly back home. so she asked if she could stay in my house until she could change her flight, since i knew she had nowhere to go and it was only for a couple of days i agreed. A week passed and she told me that she had to go to court the 3rd week of sept and she might as well wait instead of going to flr and coming back. so she did that, now during this time her and child's father reconciled and apparently got her pg AGAIN! the agreement was that after she went to court she was going to arrange her flight , but now that she has found out she is pg , she is stalling. yesterday she just told me that she made an appt and its on nov 7. so basically she is implying that she going to be here till then.
2007-10-12 02:51:34 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
my problem is that i live in a studio apt with my bf. since she has to stay there it has caused my bf to stay @ his moms. which he hates.Then to top it off. i am at work all day she stays in my house doing whatever she pleases. then when i get home , she fights about what i want to watch on tv. if she left dishes from the day and i ask her to wash them she gets nasty. and last but not least. after being all day at home, doing nothing. she has the nerve to get mad cause she wants to go to sleep at a certain time. how do i handle this. i don't want to be a B** she has no money and nowhere to go. she is totally confused about this pg. one min she says she is going to keep it the next she is not. her childs father states he can't give her money , let alone find a place for her to live in. and she says that she knows he is going to end up hurting her since he has abused her in the past
2007-10-12 02:59:37 · update #1
I know she's family,but no one can take advantage of you unless you let them. Be honest and tell her she needs to find some where to go. That you need your space back. She is taking advantage of you.
2007-10-12 02:56:04 · answer #1 · answered by just me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just kick her out. Don't wait until Nov. 7th. She has taken advantage of you and already turned a couple of days into over a month. And worse, she's not even a good house guest! She has made you alter her life to her convenience, and you have to clean up after her too? And you don;t even get to watch what you want on TV?!
You are very kind for trying to help out a friend, but this friend has gone too far. She has nowhere else to go because she doesn;t have to try to find a place. She will just keep screwing up her life, and coming back and sponging off you. Tell her she has a week to get going. That will motivate her to find somewhere else to live.
2007-10-12 10:23:11 · answer #2 · answered by julz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her by saying it's the father's responsibility. I know it seems old fashioned but it's a way to break into a conversation about her leaving. If you don't believe it is truly his responsibility to house her, it is beside the point...this is just an example...say something to get the ball rolling without putting blame on anyone, just talk about solutions. Maybe she doesn't know that her behavior is a problem so you may want to start with that?
2007-10-12 09:56:20 · answer #3 · answered by TarasBoutiqueAtEtsy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be straight forward and tell her what you expect. If you want her to get her own place, pay part of the rent, or whatever exactly it is. People who will take advantage of you and your friendship aren't going to take a hint very well. You need to be direct and honest. Just because she's a cousin does mean you owe her anything.
2007-10-12 09:56:47 · answer #4 · answered by John 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
PLEASE, kick her out today, not next week, not once she does this or that........today!!!!!!! She is a free loading disease and each minute she's in your life she sickens your life also.
We all have a life to live, every minute she is wrecking yours and not living hers. She never will until you kick her out.
I had a girlfriend just like her, and after 2 years I wanted to break up but she had no where to go....7 years later (what a waist of my life) I kicked her out.
I was 18,000 in debt from her, trying to look after her lazy ***.
Three months after I kicked her out, she had her own place, lost the 50 pounds she gained, had a good job, started living life. She told me that it was hard to get over me because she depended on me, but now she THANKS me for kicking her out, it made her have to live life, and now were both alot more happy.
Good luck, I was where you were and it waisted 7 years of my life, don't you waist another minute.
2007-10-12 10:04:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Holy Sh*t that's some dram ya got there she better pay some rent something help out.. do something tel her she got to find a place to go use the phone call some one try to help her out the faster you do the quicker she gone... just keep reminder her that she cant stay here for every
2007-10-12 09:57:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your going to have to ask her to leave. This situation seems as though it is putting stress on you that you really dont need to have. You said she was your cousin, where is her mother or your grandmother? Maybe a quick phone call to one of these women can help you get her off her a@@ and out of your door.
Good luck!
2007-10-12 10:13:08 · answer #7 · answered by Kelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that you arent trying to put her in a situation or anything but you really cant have her staying with you anymore, all of your bills are higher and you need some time alone. Ask her if she could go stay with her husband.
2007-10-12 09:56:05 · answer #8 · answered by Sherie D 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your cousin has a mother and father. Call them to come and get her. I'm sorry she hasn't any money and no where to go but that's her fault not yours. Are you willing to lose your relationship for her? She is using you, get a backbone and throw her out.
2007-10-12 10:28:50 · answer #9 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you simply have to ask her to leave.......let her know that you need your own space. you agreed to help her out and now it's time to move on...........she's using you. she's supposed to be an adult.......her getting upset because you ask her to move on can't be a reason for you to keep letting her stay there. Tell her that "by such and such a date (chose a date)I need you to tell me where you would like for me to take you because I need my apartment back". simple as that
2007-10-12 10:05:01 · answer #10 · answered by Lady D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋