pregnant and husband wants an abortion?

Question

i was on the birthcontrol pill and it didnt work i got pregnant my husband wasnt so happy with the news he told me to get an abortion i told him that i wouldnt , so he told me to choose between him and the baby i said the baby now he wants a divorce he got really mad he told me that he was going to hit me in my stomach so i can loose the baby now hes telling me that he wants me out of his house and that he wants a divorce hes tells me his not going to help me with the baby , he only wants to take responsability with our first child shes 4 yrs old what can i do hes being really mean telling me that hes going to hit me. the house is under his name so gave me a month to go some where else what can i do. he told me to wait for the divorce papers.

we live in nevada he bough it 1 yr ago hes always telling im not worth it and that im a looser because hes the one bringing the money home im stay at home mom taking care of my daughter and 2 dogs when we got pregnant with our first kid we agree that i was going to be stay at home mom but he thinks that because he has a job that he owns me thats why he to mad because i didnt agree with the abortion and i always agree on everything

i told my mom was going on but she told me to give him time but its been a week the only people that know whats going on is his mom and dad their not that happy with him they said the have my back.

Answer 1

Go somewhere...anywhere....just somewhere safe.
Don't let ANYONE tell you to kill your baby! Don't let ANYONE hurt your baby.
Let him get the divorce. If this is the kind of person he is you don't need him. Many single mothers do just fine on their own. Besides, it doesn't matter what he says about not helping to support the baby. He won't have a choice if he is ordered to pay child support.

Answer 2

I am sorry that you're husband is being such a jerk. Call the police and let them know he has threatened to hit you. Do you have any relatives in the area that you can stay with? Or a friend. If you do, I would suggest you take your daughter and leave. If you want this baby (I would leave him regardless just for the way he is acting), he should be supportive. If he wants to file for divorce, let him. If he thinks he doesn't have to provide for it he is wrong. He will have to pay child support for both your children, and depending on your situation, alimony to support you as well. Is this the first time he has ever threatened to hit you? It doesn't matter that the house is under his name, you're married, and unless you signed a prenuptial agreement, half the house is yours. Hang in there, he doesn't sound like a very good man, and you and your daughter deserve much better. Good luck.

Answer 3

As long as he is the only one who could possibly be the father , I guess he is 50% to blame. He could have gone and gotten a vasectomy if he didn't want to be a dad again, or he could have kept his pants zipped. You didn't have an immaculate conception. That being said, I would gather up my marriage license, the deed to the house, all bank account and insurance information. Get your daughters birth certificate too., and seek out a lawyer. If your husband was angry enough to make such a threat to my safety, I would be filing a restraining order with the police department as well. Do you have family that you can stay with? Find out where the nearest women's shelter is located and tell them what your husband has said. This is not a safe place for you or your daughter who is also likely to reap some of his anger. This is not a situation to let idle. Speak to your OB/Gyn as they can probably put you in contact with the right people to keep you safe. Do this without delay. Your husband sounds like a violent person and someone who would say something like that to you does not love you.

Answer 4

File for divorce yourself on the grounds of cruelty, emotionally, and physically if he touches you. How can a husband threaten his wife like that? He needs to be kicked in the stomach, not you. He's not worth your time or energy honey. I know it's hard, but try not to waste any tears on his sorry ***. He obviously doesn't love you or he would not be mad b/c you are pregnant. It takes two regardless of what kind of protection you use. You may also want to get a restraining order against him to get him out of the house with you and your daughter b/c of the threat he made. Take him to court and get all the spousal and child support you can. Do not let him off easy, especially with the child support, b/c remember it's for your daughter. After that enjoy your life w/o him and love yourself, your daughter, and your new bundle of joy.

When my bro in-law called the cops b/c his gf wouldn't come home with their daughter(they are both on the birth certificate), they cops went to the mom's apartment, but they told him that there was nothing he could do b/c she was the mom. This was in Las Vegas, just last year, so if I were you I would just leave him. You have his parents support and hopeful your mom will still telling you to give him time, b/c that time could cost you.

Answer 5

Your husband should be supportive. He SHOULD be happy about you having a child. Whatever you do -stay strong. This is your child, and you are carrying it. I believe that while it is his decision too, it is more yours, as the mother and the one carrying the child. You need to talk to him, find out what it is that is really the reason behind him wanting you to get an abortion. If he absolutely refuses to let you have your baby, you may need to evaluate your situation- is he really the guy for you? Whatever you do, please don't get an abortion. My view on abortion is that it is murder. Adoption is absolutely the way to go. Good luck. And remember, talking is the best thing you can do at this point. You have time before the baby comes to work something out, either with him or another family.

Answer 6

He's totally screwed. Don't move out, don't agree to any settlement that involves him getting the house. If you do leave, it's almost impossible to get back in, but he can't just throw you out. He's going to end up losing everything and he deserves it. Just protect yourself, keep a cell phone on you so you can call 911 and if you can, try to get some proof that he's threatening you. If you can get that, you can get a restraining ordrer and he would have to leave the house.

At the same time, be willing to forgive him if he has a change of heart. He probably feels betrayed. Some guys are control freaks, but if he doesn't do you wrong and has a change of heart, consider giving it another go. I'd hate to see two children go through a painful divorce if it can be avoided. Get you a lawyer, though. Don't worry about the cost, he'll end up paying for it in the end.

And I hope you have a healthy, beautiful baby!!

Answer 7

FORGET HIM! Listen it is not your fault that you got pregnant, whether or not your "husband" wants to take responsibility for it, it takes two. He shouldn't threaten you with divorce papers. If he does, don't sweat it. If he wants to leave you over a baby then you don't need him. He should not threaten you with abuse either, you should not take that. I say tell him that you will call the police on him. It is also not up to him whether or not he helps with the baby. As long as you can prove the baby is his, he will be required to take care of it. I'm so sorry about your situation. No one should have to go through this. Maybe you could go stay with your mother until you are able to get on your feet.

Answer 8

Any man that can be the mean over a baby has some problems maybe you need to take you 4 year old and move in with a family member until your on you feet

Answer 9

Get yourself a lawyer today and tell them everything you told us ... make sure they know about the house, but just because its in his name doesn't make it his. Your married ... maybe you should make sure someone knows where you are at all times like your mother or a friend so that if he tries something your protected. If he's dumb enough to hit you while your pregnant you won't need a divorce, he can go to jail for attempted murder.

Answer 10

Call the police and have them come over and arrest him for threatening you and the baby by hitting you, then you get a lawyer and take his azz for everything, including child support for BOTH children, and he should be ashamed of suggesting an abortion, what a low down selfish MF-ing AH!