2007-10-11 14:59:24 · 12 answers · asked by nick c 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well I am the wife....I really think is shows a lack of respect to discuss personal problems regarding your spouse on YA without first discussing them with your spouse....
2007-10-11 15:03:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋
I think secret is the wrong word. Every person needs privacy or at least the expectation of it if they want it. I don’t hide my thoughts and feelings from very many people so there is no hiding anything with me but I talk about my thoughts and feelings in a safe forum that helps me not have to drag my husband into some dumb probably less than profound discussion/fight usually when I can work my crap out here with my Answers friends.
Who cares, I am hurting no one, you don’t know me, no one does so it does not hurt him or his ego (maybe that he is not my all and everything, I wish it were so, I meant for it to be, I grew up on the fairytales, but it doesn’t work that way for me at least) and I do not push him away and we usually have pretty great sex because of it actually. No fighting, no fuss, lots of frills and thrills, Yahoo answers may be saving my marriage; not what the answers are just that they are and they usually are supportive of the questioner.
I support you. It can be scary to realize that your wife has outside interests. She probably did before you married her and her independence was probably attractive to you before you married her also. Remember who you two were and see if you can be those two people in the marriage, not only when you are dating. Shouldn’t we all put our best foot forward. I know I am not great at it but yahoo answers are helping. Woman need to discuss, let her. I am not saying that you should not be able to read it but you should not let it worry you, it will probably help if you let it. It is a woman thing and healthy.....good luck.....S
2007-10-12 00:55:52 · answer #2 · answered by scsspace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Nick.....maybe your wife doesn't know how to talk to you about what is bothering her. Or maybe when she does try to talk, you shut her down or turn things back to her. (I have personal experience in this one.) Find some quiet time, turn off the tv, make sure the kids are asleep, and FOCUS on her and what she has to say. Maybe she feels like she isn't at the top of your priority list? What about health problems? Depression? Job or family stress? Life has a way of taking it's toll on us, especially when we are too busy to stop and take some time for ourselves. Maybe she just needs a few days alone.....time to take a long hot bubble bath or read a book or clean the house (and have it stay clean long enough for her to sit back, look around, and enjoy it being really clean). We women are different and we think and feel differently. Talk to her, but more importantly, really listen to what she has to say. These may seem like dumb things to a man, but trust me, they can renew a woman's spirit in many ways (some you may not expect!) Good luck!
2007-10-11 22:15:04 · answer #3 · answered by grandkate 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your wife is entitled to all the privacy she wants. If she wants to amuse herself with Yahoo answers before discussing things with you, fine. An intelligent person never takes the advice of strangers blindly though, so assuming you married what you think is an intelligent woman (cause if not wow, don't breed), your wife is most likely finding entertainment and occasionally something to think about before speaking with you. Is it wrong for your wife to think things through privately, before discussing things with you? Yahoo Answers provides an anonymous enviroment where she can discuss personal issues without anyone knowing who she is or where she is from. *Assuming she is bright enough to sign up using a fake name/address and email.*
2007-10-11 22:04:24 · answer #4 · answered by some female 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well, my husband has never asked about what I'm talking about on answers, but honestly I ask a lot of questions about marital advice. I don't do it to undermine him....just looking for an unbiased opinion. If he got on here and looked at what I have been asking he may not like it, but I'd rather ask strangers than tell my (our) friends about the issues we face and ask advice. Women love to talk and ask other's opinions. I get my fix of other people's input this way, without talking to people who know us about it.
2007-10-11 22:15:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You sound inscure. You act as though she is on a dating site or porno site. I think getting advice from normal people is better than the quacks that you have to pay and the only reason they are in that professsion is because they are trying to fix there own problems. Relax.
2007-10-11 22:14:17 · answer #6 · answered by s f 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a wife with a secret life on Q&A nothing wrong with that.We give answers thats all so what's the problem.
Like fox said up there it helps us sense our husbands are so sensitive we have to tippy toe around their egos.
2007-10-11 22:15:56 · answer #7 · answered by Teenie 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Because she can't, and u wouldn't want her to, discuss every little thing on her mind and in her heart, but if she needs answers to every little silly question in her pretty little head, then let her get some answers, and give out some advice. There are no names on this site, only information, so it's harmless. I think, so it should be fine.
2007-10-11 22:32:48 · answer #8 · answered by Uncertain Soul 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
No. Why get married at all if you're not going to trust the other person, ask them for help, or keep secret lives from them?
2007-10-12 07:24:40 · answer #9 · answered by AnswerGuy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think its her private questions to ask and if she wanted the answers from you she would of asked them to you.. you have a right to some private things also.. i would bet you talk to your buddys at work about the wifes.. they all do. i know i worked with men in a factory for years. maybe she feels better asking questions here do to she dont know anyone and as an outsider we wont judge her for her questions. i sure hope you dont come down on her hard for it.. you might not like what she has to say about it..
2007-10-12 00:22:34 · answer #10 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋