im engaged to my high school sweetheart . i felt he was my soul mate unitl ....BUMMER he cheated on me right after my sons 1st birthday. He says it was his fault not mine that he should have confronted me with the issues he was feeling(loneliness, no affection, no attention, and NO SEX!) I had a hard pregnancy that left me unable to have intercourse for a good 6mnths! yeah tell ME about it! this was my 1st baby & I was so happy. Not only did he cheat on me he also got her pregnant! of course she didnt keep it! i kicked him out for 2wks). I let him back in because he was crying not eating & tried to commit suicide. I couldnt let that happen to the father of my child! After it all happend I did it to him BUT he never found out. It was a down low thing with this guy Ive felt deeply for since 4th grade. I had dreamed about this guy since we last saw each other (3yrs) &when i saw him i couldnt resist! ive placed that behind me & am double thinking the engagement!am i wrong
2007-10-11 11:57:48 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if he's really changed to commit to one person (namely you), then I would take him back. And for the relationship getting stronger... even in hard time, you should find a way to let him know that you still care and not totally forget or ignore him.
Men are like babies, need attention once a while.
2007-10-11 12:07:02 · answer #1 · answered by KarenaT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No!!! don't marry the fool. Love should be the only reason to get married not that you felt sorry for him and it wasn't your fault that he cheated on you, it was HIS fault. only marry somebody out of love for EACH OTHER, does he take your advice to consider improving for you? well he should if he loves you and vise versa,You are not wrong, your smart, If you cheated on him for revenge then you 2 will only be hurting each other more and more and that's not love, If you think that you can't break it off immediately then you can start to see less and less of each other little by little and if any of you needs a date or two, do it, that's what worked for me when I broke it off with my fiance some years ago and it worked great, we made this agreement mutually and then followed through. Girl if I were you I'd tell him what a sorry piece he is and advise him to get help but I WOULD NOT MARRY THAT, tell him (if you agree with this) that he can see and provide for his child( because law gives him these privileges) but that's it. What you have described is not a love relationship, a good love relationship will have to last you a lifetime of kissing each other,(among other things more) and working together, and admiring each other and you two do not have any of this (among other things) to get married.
2007-10-11 12:54:00 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you want to marry this person? If you want to marry him and be with him - regardless of what might have happened in the past - then go for it. Just because you two did stupid things doesn't mean that you can't be together. People mature. Do you feel you two are ready for marriage? Look at how things are now, not at how they were several years ago. Are things going well between you two? Do you enjoy this person's companionship? Do you accept each other as you are? Do you LIKE who this person is, and does he LIKE who you are?
2007-10-11 12:04:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to commit your self to someone who was not commited to you, When you needed him to be there for you he wasent and now your back with him again and he fathered another child also he has no respect for you at all.
If you put this behind than you need to move on do what is best for you have the answer i dont. Do what ever makes you happy this is your choice not mines marriage is not entered into likely.
best of luck
2007-10-11 12:23:53 · answer #4 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need counseling to put this behind you but you do have a good basis for making this work if you both try hard enough. You have to learn to talk to each other and live for each day in the future without remembering what happened in the past.
2007-10-11 12:14:40 · answer #5 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your not wrong. Your actually quite lucky to have seen this before getting married. You have both been unfaithful and trying to start a life together on that note is next to impossible. If you truly love him then I would seek a good year or more of couples therapy before even considering marriage. If you are not so in love, let it go.
2007-10-11 12:04:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should get some couples counceling, see if you can work this out and put his and your cheating behind him. This is more important than signing a piece of paper, for the piece of paper pretty much depends on the first issue.
Good luck.
PS: What a d*ckhead, your boyfriend, that is...
2007-10-11 12:29:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't sound like either one of you are mature enough to get married...that's sad for the baby involved...
2007-10-11 19:04:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you aren't wrong per-say...But I tell what would be wrong...You and this guy getting married....Trust this statement...NEITHER ONE OF YOU ARE READY...
2007-10-11 12:19:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes u should get married
2007-10-11 11:59:53 · answer #10 · answered by kayla victoria :] 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋