This is a little embarrassing?

Question

I was recently married. i have been with the same man for the past 7 years. He is sexy as hell, sweet, and treats me like a queen. The only problem is he doesn't satisfy me in bed. I have been faking it so long that I am afraid to tell him the truth. I love my husband and i want to spend the rest of my life with him but somethign has got to give.
PLS help!!!!!!

Answer 1

Tell him you would like a different approach in that department. Tell him what you would like for him to do. Make it a game like. Tell him what feels good. You can say, yes Honey, that feels good, but I think if we do this......., It would feel even better. Don't be afraid to communicate to your best friend. I am sure he would love to add more to your romantic department. Best wishes to you.

Answer 2

Wow, alot of answers ! As usual it's hard to include enough info in the question. I was married 20 years to a female I didn't satisfy, but it was a bad marriage. But I did find out after I was divorced that I pleaded women just fine. Imagine how that felt after 20 years. One big question is why doesn't he please you. Can he ever? It sounds like you have a really soulmelded relationship.so Don't tell him you've been faking it for 7 years. Tell him you love him so much that you want to have a mind blowind sex life that gets better all the time and love enough to do anything to do that. If he KNOWS how....and you have no problem with orgasims.....there is a solution. Fix what's broken, then if you both love enough to make it incredable....do anything you have to do and see if he is willing to also. Wish I had more info. In the extreme, some people accept limitation and love enough to do anything that doesn't hurt anybody, and both agree on to make it hot. Some think the ultimate in LOVE is to love enough to share mates...talk about fantasies......and explore the limits within that soulmelded relationship...if it really is.
Feel free to email [e-mail] or IM...mysihba if you want to share more info.

Answer 3

Oh damn. I think you should have told him about it before you were married.

Well, there's nothing you can do but tell him. I'm sure it will crush his ego to kow that you've been faking orgasms all these years but what can you do?

Also, you say he doesn't satisfy you in bed but could it be that you have never figured out how to have an orgasm? If you have never had an orgasm with any man, then I would try cozying up to a vibrator to help you figure out what does it for you. I can't say for sure but it seems like if you haven't had an orgasm for 7 yrs then the problem may just has well be with you as with him. Not saying that in a negative way at all, it's just that I had the same problem about 15 years ago and then I finally figured out how to have an orgasm and - poof - problem solved (it wasn't the guy after all).

Answer 4

No, of course not!!! Never in a million years you should never tell him such a thing!!!! Can you imagine all he feels for you and him together in bed, finding out its a lie??? He would be so offended and so bitter that i am sure that he will run off in a little time with someone else (than maybe fakes it too).
Why not introduce some sexy toys for couples in your bed life?? It seems you love him and he loves you back, so just buy a little something, and on a nice night with a bit of wine, just surprise him!!! You might find the surprise will all be yours!!! Too much honesty in this occasion is no good!!

Answer 5

I think that you should have already talked to him ages ago.
Being with this man for 7 years...is quite a long time...
Don't fake it anymore, this is not a solution. Talk to him about all that. This is the only way you can fix it.
Don't tell him that you faked it for 7 years. Tell him that you would like to "improve" you sex life, and you want to do new things.
Ask him what you want him to do for you.
If you think that he is not the problem, then why not seeing a sexologist.
But you should def finitely talk to him about what you like, and you don't like. This can help you find out what pleases you most.

Answer 6

If you are too afraid to tell him, i would suggest that the next time you are going to have sex why don't you introduce something new e.g. sex toys, role playing or even some soft porn. Most guys find it very sexy when their wife or girl friend introduces something new to the bedroom, at the same time you are able to explore each others desires and needs enabling you to tell him how you want things done. This will teach him exactly how you like to be pleased (most guys are always willing to learn something new) without you having to feel bad about hurting his feelings.

Good Luck and have fun :)

Answer 7

I know you love him sweetie, maby try sex therapy counseling, I know a lot of men, including my man, will not go to therapy, because he thinks that there is nothing wrong with him, and there is not, some couples just need new ideas, and new suggestions to make it work, that is what I suggest you do, get some videos, get some "toys" and just have fun, if you do not want to take your man to counseling kicking and screaming and growling, LOL, then there are plenty of other helpful things out there, to make your sex life better!

Go to Spencers, in the mall, and get sex videos and watch some good porn on the tv, that is what gets me and my hubby rowled!!!! :)

You are natural and normal to feel that way!!!!

We have all been there and done that and are still doing that!!!! :)

Answer 8

Damn girl he can't be that bad! what he get off to quick or something he is impotent? you need to clarify so we can give you the right answer.. if he finish to quick this is something that you can just tell him about.. ask him to foreplay more because you have needs too..you need to talk to him and tell him first that you love him so much and that you don't want to hurt his pride or nothing but hey you married to him.. he has to understand you can't go out there and look for something you already have at home, discuss this with him find a solution together maybe a sex therapist.. if he loves you he will try better.. good luck.

Answer 9

Are you sure you know what would satisfy you? Even if you don't know, you need to discuss this with your husband in a non-threatening manner. It might be fun to try to figure out what you need. Your husband may have some good ideas. I think sex starts in the brain, so a lot of sexy talking and caressing might help to get you where you need to go.

Answer 10

How about you get the book The Joy of Sex. Ask him if he would like to experiment different postions then show him the book.

This book explains a lot about sex and even shows pictures of positions.

Alternatively hire or buy an adult dvd. Some of these dvds are not "blue" movies but are instructional. Watch it together and discuss which postion you both would like to try.

Have fun and enjoy yourselves.

Good Luck

Answer 11

well this is a hard one to tackle because of the subject matter however.....to me true intimacy is not so much the sexual act as it is being able to bare your heart soul and feelings to eachother...no offense to the men in regards to my next statement......i know that saying anything to him about this will hurt his male ego...but not saying anything to him about this will do more damage in the long run....i see nothing wrong with 2 people sitting in bed and talking about what makes the other feel good...example....babes do you like when i do this or that and.....hon when you do this i love it etc....you need to be able to communicate with him....sex is a very important part of any relationship faking it does you nor him any good....after 7 years i would think you could talk to him about anything even if the subject matter is rather tender if you know what i mean...you say this man loves you and you love him...then be honest i wouldnt say you havnt been satisfied in the last 7 years be more tactful then that......i wish you luck in this i know how hard it must be for you.....as i said true intimacy is being able to bare your soul...........