English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

and she kept on telling me "what if i find someone new? what will you do?"....

2007-10-10 19:30:51 · 10 answers · asked by jj 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

10 answers

When a married person says "If I find somebody new" it's code for "I'm cheating with another person" They just haven't gotten tired of sneaking around yet. Ya want to wait until she's ready, perhaps until you get a nice std? You can wait, but it's over. I'm sorry, but that IS what's going on.

2007-10-11 00:56:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Hi JJ, trust me she's joking. We women sometimes say things like this when we are frustrated but we really dont mean it. What she really wants is " YOUR ATTENTION" :)) so give it to her! ALL marriages go through these tough times. My pastor explains it in this way - He says that marriages are made of 4 rings and 4 weeks and each week can take years.
- The first ring is 'engagement ring' ( this is the time when you are madly in love. You wont buy a veggie unless you've touched it! Together!).
- The second week is 'tada... wedding ring' (here, you are still in love and you're excited about everything.....)
- and as time passes by you come to the third week ,'booorring....' ( now, things dont seem to be exciting anymore. You know everything you need to know about the other person. Your differences begin to stand out more in this week. And your lifepartner is not close to being excited about you either.)
- And the last ring... is 'suffering' ( This is the place where you make your decision....!!!!!!)
No marriage is perfect and it's true these few sentences really apply to us today. I've been married for 2 years now... and I can say that we're in the third week. And we have both realised that the more we spend time together the greater are our chances of overcoming such obstacles. It's not easy but you need to work on it everyday. After some time we realised that we're really enjoying this ride together... it's not tiring or burdensome because we love eachother and want our marriage to work. Dont get disturbed about what she said... dont dwell on the negative... look for solutions! What I want to ask you is - Have you changed a lot from the time you got married? Maybe she feels that you're not the same anymore. All women want to feel secure, loved and wanted. We dont mind our husbands changing but what we cannot take is when we see that the fire in our marriage is going out. Arrange for a holiday or a picnic with just the two of you, or make her a candle light dinner... and if none of these things really touch her then ALL you need to do IS GIVE HER SOME QUALITY TIME WITH YOU! That means quality time WITHOUT your mobile phone. Hope things will work out for you and God Bless.

2007-10-10 20:12:10 · answer #2 · answered by annie 2 · 0 0

It sounds like she has fallen out of love with you & has very possibly already found someone else. If she is continuously asking you what you would do if she were to find someone else, she has more than likely either found someone else or has someone that she is considering cheating with. However, since she is asking you what your reaction would be, that can be construed as her begging you to make her fall in love with you again.

You need to seek marraige counceling immediately. This isn't just a matter of the spark being gone, your entire marraige is at stake here. In the meantime, try to make her feel special. Write her a little love note & leave it where she is sure to find it. Bring her fresh flowers every day for a week. Surprise her in bed with the promise to do whatever she wants-- no matter how kinky she thinks it is. Do whatever it takes to bring back that magic.

2007-10-10 19:44:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

She needless to say does not relish bunking with you mate. intercourse could be your motivation yet you won't be her motivation to have intercourse. this complete factor approximately pretending to sleep and feeling unwell is getting used as an excuse. to maintain you away. Ouch. you're far off from homestead for a month at a time? She possibly suspects you of cheating on her interior that factor. and clearly you suck at keeping onto your end of the dating in the journey that your communique isn't open. preserving her at homestead like a cage animal. Yeah, this is gonna make her happy. you desire something to advance your intercourse existence mutually mate. enable's communicate approximately doing romantic issues that should make her happy. somewhat of coming homestead, swiping your finger on the floor to examine if this is been wiped sparkling by using your spouse, sitting down for dinner that your spouse makes, and then watching for intercourse, attempt to awaken her up somewhat. end being like the King. initiate making her sense like the Queen. Take her out for dinner. no longer cheapo dinner the two, high quality dinner at a high quality eating place with solid service. ideally with a view, in spite of if over a river or an entire-city view at evening whilst all of the lights furniture are sparkling. purchase her a present. Make her sense particular returned. jewelry, flora, a blouse that she might placed on, a solid e book if she likes analyzing, etc. infinite opportunities. Make her smile. Be candy to her. touch her tenderly just to reassure her that she is the only one on your existence. Open doorways for her, vehicle doorways too, close the homestead windows if she's chilly. LITTLE issues MAKE a huge distinction.

2016-12-18 04:28:46 · answer #4 · answered by bocklund 4 · 0 0

It is over. Give her the divorce she is afraid to ask you directly for. She obviously is no longer in love with you and if you do make her fall back in love with you, you will just end right back here after a while. As to whether she is cheating or not, who knows. She may have her eye on somebody, but it for sure isn't you. I say time to cut your losses. If you do stay together you will never trust her and then she will cheat. Sorry, I know it hurts, but you will get over it.

2007-10-11 08:49:27 · answer #5 · answered by jimmy b 1 · 0 0

Maybe consider marriage counselling. May work.
A surprise weekend retreat may recharge the batteries.
Think outside of the box. Surprise moves on your part may help her to see what she originally fell for with you.

2007-10-10 19:35:38 · answer #6 · answered by Bear 2 · 0 0

maybe she is not into you anymore. maybe you did something or she just got burned out and it aint ment to be. maybe she has someone else. maybe you seem a little controlling and she wants to see how you will act if she ends this with you and moves on. maybe she is seeing how much you will show her you interested in NOT losing her. maybe she has grown apart from you and it is time for seperation.

2007-10-10 19:36:35 · answer #7 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 0 0

Its sad to say but she might be interested in someone else. If you want her by your side remind of how wonderful it once was. good luck. If it dosen't work out I'm sure someone else out there is waiting for you.

2007-10-10 20:27:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

She may have already found someone. I would suggest that if you have children, you get to a marriage counselor a soon as possible.

2007-10-10 19:36:23 · answer #9 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 2 0

It sound serious, I think you guys should seek couples therapy. What she is saying is what she has been thinking about and could be some type of warning. you need to talk to her.

2007-10-10 19:35:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

fedest.com, questions and answers