Sometimes I feel like I will never find someone to love me?

Question

I am 24 female, almost 25.

I have never been in a serious relationship. I have had very high expectations and I DEFINATELY know that being obese has not helped.

I was a late bloomer, my first bf was when I was almost 20. Then a year later I got into a really bad car accident and over a year of not being able to move I gained 75 pounds.

I thought people would judge me on the inside but that is not how men are.

So now I am losing weight and also losing hope in finding someone who cares for me.

Why is it so hard to find a nice guy that is educated and around my age to love me?

Answer 1

you need not seek love..love will seek u ! at some moment some day some time,u will get struck with love..wait for it!

Answer 2

I may be only 14, but I know you've heard this so many times "You'll come across the one.."
It's great your losing weight =) I, myself, am too on my own Healthy Eating scheduele & excersice routine.
Try renting an aerobics movie from a video store or something, it's a fun way to lose weight =)
Lots of fruits are yummy too.
Limit yourself fruit for snacks, and swap white bread to wholemeal. Treat yourself to one yummy cake/snack of your choice outside the healthy eating boundries once a week, to once a fortnight =) It will make you feel much better getting the physical interpretation of yourself, off of your chest.

Open yourself up into a wide variety of community events, meet and greet a few people =) Meet friends of a friend, I know I'm only young but I guarantee if you try to follow this advice you may get a step further than before =)

Goodluck.

P.S in RE: to your sub-question "Why is it so hard to find a nice guy that is educated and around my age to love me?"

Look a little deeper into the perspective, you may have him already?

xo

Answer 3

Dearest Gianina: You ROCK~ Girl !! The little I know about you~ I can almost GUARANTEE that you will Magically Find a Meaningful Relationship! I really enjoy reading all your questions! Your Pathway is leading to a very special place! Just keep being "true" to yourself. Be the Best You~ that you can Possibly Be! Being "hurt" is all a part of our Daily, Grand Human Experience! If we do NOT Hurt~ we are NOT Really LIVING or Feeling. Permit me to warn you about~ "Disney-Love"! This is a Fantasy. There is NO Such Thing As~ * "Prince-Charming"! That is a Movie! You will discover true love within the next 10 years, as you gain maturity & "Emotional-Intelligence"! You will probably meet a HUNK who plays soccer in South America! He will probably look like Anthony B.! :-) Good Luck Girl~ Have FUN! Awesome Things Are Right Around The Corner For YOU~ Gianina ! You are a special young lady!

Answer 4

it's hard for a desperate girl to find a guy. Some people feel incomplete being single, but that is far from the truth. Enjoy being single. You have other people who LOVE you and CARE about you. Like your friends and family. Sometimes when you focus just on romantic love you forget the other types of love.

This is probably what you least wanted to hear but i think everyone needs to hear it once in a while

Answer 5

It is to my understanding that since you have gained weight you have also loss self-confidence as well. And it is the sad truth men do look for physical attractiveness as a prime measurement. You may have also loss self-confidence because you called yourself "obese". I think your next step is to continue to lose weight by eating a proper and healthy diet and doing physical activities like sports. While doing sports, you can meet other people and socialize. That way you have a new connection to meet new guys. You will find a good man who will love you for who you are. Sorry but I had to be realistic about the situation, I did not mean to offend you in anyway and I wish the best for you. But you need to gain confidence! Good Luck!

Answer 6

Loneliness strikes everybody at one point or another. Stay strong, confident and positive minded. Get into some positive activites and stay busy. Time from there works things out.

Nothing wrong with being a "late bloomer".

Plenty of men out there DO judge women by what's inside their hearts and minds. And there's even more men out there that adore "rubenesque" women, hence the abbreviation "BBW".

You'll attract the guys sure enough: just be sure they meet your age and education criteria--and NEVER compromise on your standards!!

Answer 7

Don't lose hope if your weight is coming off then feel more proud of yourself and people are suppose to like you from the inside person that you are and if they don't then that isn't the person for you. The right person will come to you . My sister had the same problem and things worked out for her.

Answer 8

To tell you the truth I always wondered the same, but im small and petite with a butt, Very cute what guys would say. But I could never find that one guy.... Then 'i learned to have that patience people spoke of.... sometimes the one you run to to share all your hurt and secrets with, turn out to be the one in hidden form. ... For me it happened in the way of just hanging out with a guy and then 5 months later we became more and i met the family and they loved me!!!! Don't search for that guy, and dont over look....

Answer 9

Well in a few years younger, a decent weight and have the same issue. I guess you just have to keep telling yourself that you will find someone if its meant to be. Is it too much to ask for a guy to look on the inside?

Answer 10

Men are pigs. I'm a man, I used to be a pig too. But a woman saw something in me, so she culled me from the herd of other pigs and trained me to be a proper human being. That's what you might have to do. Or, you could be patient and find some things to help build confidence in yourself. You seem to have a relatively poor self-image, you need to concentrate on that first, being happy with yourself. If you're happy with yourself, you'll find it much easier to meet someone you really like that really likes you. Or, like I said, just train one, men are trainable, but they might go on the floor so put down some newspapers. : ) I'm sure you'll do fine, just have some faith in yourself, believe in yourself a little and things will start falling into place for you.

Answer 11

Hey, I'm 38 and divorced and I know what you're talking about.
I've been divorced for 6 years now and I really want a wife.

I'm not going to settle for someone who wants to constantly try to manipulate me though.

Nowadays, the people I meet are so shallow and insincere that if I don't fit into a certain mold of their idea of attractive, I don't have a chance. Inner beauty means little to a lot of people. I'm not one of those people. I've dated a fair few full-figured and even rotund women, who turned out to be some of my favorite people to hang out with. Unfortunately, they wanted one thing and I wanted another. I was not ready for a new relationship when I met them and they were.
Most of the large women I knew were sincere. I've never met a thin girl who was sincere. I've only met thin crank-addicts and manipulators who want a man to support their habits-be it drugs or spending-and the big girls I knew were all self sufficient.
I am going to give props to the big girls out there, including you if you can take it as a compliment. Big girls may not look like models but they deserve to. I've never met a thin girl that could cook a good pot roast and I've never met a thin girl that didn't say some garbage like, "You know, I could find someone better than you, someone with more money, better looking, and someone who will give me anything I want." Every thin girl I have ever met was nutty, because she wouldn't eat real food, or she took drugs or was bolemic to stay thin... And every big girl I know has been a Godsend to me.
You keep your chin up and know that a real man will appreciate you for what you are on the inside and not worry too much about the outside, because he knows the outside can change.

Good luck, Girlie