3 Holy Men and a Bear
A priest, a Pentecostal preacher, and a rabbi all served as chaplains to the students of NorthernMichiganUniversityin Marquette. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it.
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experience.
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. "Well," he said, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he claimed, "WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
The priest and the reverend both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The Rabbi looked up and said, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."
2007-10-10 10:43:59 · 17 answers · asked by Southern Comfort 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
I laughed when I first read this. You know what, clergymen are people, too. They aren't infallible, and they can trip over their own feet just like the rest of us. Therefore they, too, are subject to the occasional laugh and there's nothing wrong with it.
2007-10-11 01:40:02 · answer #1 · answered by Lady G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Clergy Jokes
2016-12-12 11:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was one of the best religious jokes I have heard in the last 20 years. Very good. Did you ever hear or did I tell the one about Jesus and Peter coming to earth to play golf? If not, email me and I will.
2007-10-10 13:03:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I haven't heard a joke that good in years! The only problem is, I can't really say that at any dinner parties without demolishing my reputation for being sane. . . but I think my sister will like it. Thank you very much!
2007-10-10 10:55:07 · answer #4 · answered by Pepper 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
HA HA HA!!! ROFL! NO, I am not offended by clergy jokes and this one was priceless! Thanks for the grin and laughter - I needed this one!
Hey! Laughter is the best medicine and if we are so uptight we can't laugh even at things that are so called sacrosanct then we've lost our ability to exercise levity ;-)
2007-10-10 10:56:34 · answer #5 · answered by sage seeker 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
That was a long one ha ha ha
2016-03-13 08:02:41 · answer #6 · answered by Kelly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL I wasn't offended, it was a cute joke. I think we all should be able to laugh at ourselves a little more sometimes.
2007-10-10 11:11:14 · answer #7 · answered by luvspbr2 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Funny!!! Chuckles!!
2007-10-10 11:13:41 · answer #8 · answered by noonecanne 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hilarious!!!!
2007-10-10 11:28:57 · answer #9 · answered by ndnquah 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Thanks S.C. That was hilarious. It's the first time I've laughed in two day, and out loud too!
2007-10-10 12:07:56 · answer #10 · answered by Donna 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋