okay it seems like after having my baby me n my bf fight more even over some dumb things.how can we stop?
2007-10-10 10:13:47 · 30 answers · asked by lilsexymexi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
did you not hear that having a baby doesn't stop fighting? you fight more because babies come with their own stress. you sleep less and have more worries about how you are going to take care of the child. even people who have very stable relationships before a baby, still have problems after. you need to work together instead of fighting all the time.
2007-10-10 10:19:20 · answer #1 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Having a baby is one of the most wonderful but stressful things you can go through. First of all, you are probably having hormone swings like crazy. That affects how you feel physically and how you think. You are probably both sleep-deprived. It's also very scary to be responsible for a child, and if you have any other worries (like financial) that just adds to the mix. 1) Try to get as much sleep as possible - even naps help. 2) Ask someone to watch the baby, even for a short time, so you guys can be by yourselves and try to reconnect. 3) See your Dr. make sure you are not having any kind of postpartum problems that can be treated with medication. 4) Don't sweat the small stuff. Life goes on. Just take care of yourself and the baby. The laundry, etc. doesn't matter as much as you and baby do - or if you have a Mom, sister, friend who can help out, let them. 5) Try to work out a plan with BF about responsibilities. Try to come to an agreement/compromise about who does what/when/how. If you are clear about your expectations it can help alleviate the bickering. Enjoy your baby and your new life! It goes too fast . . .
2007-10-10 10:22:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Probably because you have more stress. Even though a baby is a good thing, they cause stress. You don't get enough sleep, they cry and poop all the time. So you are more on edge, and things that you used to be able to work out without fights, end up as fights.
If you are concerned that you are fighting so much it may end your relationship, see a therapist. They can give you a chance to work out your problems in a calm and appropriate way, and without fighting.
2007-10-10 10:17:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just stop. Talk openly about the fact that you're both exhausted, overwhelmed, have a beautiful little human being in between you that makes it a three-way relationship. However, that said, you HAVE to make time just for you and your significant other. Every time you're tempted to criticize, remember the fact that you have a permanent attachment FOREVER in the form of your child. Maybe that will help you keep your cool. GET SLEEP! Sleep when you can. Well-rested means you're more rational and less stressed and less prone to fight.
2007-10-10 10:39:03 · answer #4 · answered by Chrystal M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stress, you need to take time for one another as a couple without the child every now and then. Just to remind yourselves that you are both individuals and a couple, not just the baby's parents.
Its not uncommon, most parents go through it. Not to mention, if you are still in the first year postpartum...you could be having hormonal surges. Not that it forgives you completely, but it does take some consideration on his part if that is the case.
2007-10-10 10:23:29 · answer #5 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because usually couples get less sleep and a lot less sex with a new baby in the house... Take turns getting up with the baby at night and make time to make love.
2007-10-10 10:19:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
after having a baby many parents are sleep deprived and small things seem a lot bigger then what they really are. If you and your BF would count to 10 before you spoke (when starting an arguement) you would probably realize that it really was not that big of a deal.
2007-10-10 10:17:28 · answer #7 · answered by cutiepututie28 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Although you love your baby, the baby provides you guys with more stress. And under more stress, small issues arise and already small issues gety magnified. You can stop by being more aware of how you are acting and more considerate about how the other person feels.
2007-10-10 10:25:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
lack of sleep, lack of nookie, lack of closeness,
a kid changes things. The best thing to do is to set aside a time each when the kid or kids can go to grandmas, or a sitter. Get out go for dinner and a movie or coffee and a walk..
You might try marriage. Shacking up is not a stabilizing influence either.
2007-10-10 10:32:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its called stress....A lot of your time is devoted to feeding, changing, and calming a baby.....You are woke up during the night several times...so you are lacking in the sleep department........just have to work together taking care of the baby and have to realize that the baby has to come first.
2007-10-10 10:20:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋