My name is Jessica and I am 31 yrs old. I'm currently married with 3 young boys (8, 5, &18 mo.). My husband has become an alcoholic and is very verbally abusive to all of us and has begun smashing things in the house. I want really want to leave but have no resources to do so. I have been a stay at home mom so I have no money or job. I can't even afford to get an apartment. My children are scared and asked me to leave their dad but I don't know how to go anywhere. I want to move as soon as possible. If anybody could please help me or give any suggestions I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you
2007-10-10 09:30:46 · 6 answers · asked by Jessy1012 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hello Jessica! My Name is John I am in The Law Enforcement field and I may be able to help you but, you have to really want this to get out of a abusive relationship otherwise its not going to do you any good. One way you can get help is to report the abuse to the authorities so that its all on record if anything should happen to you or your children not saying that it will but, it could. Also, your city should have a abusive womans center that will assist you they will take you through all the proper steps to get help and to get away from your husband. I know that you may or may not want the police involved but, sometimes its necessary when you have kids and your on your own with no income or a place to go. When you get away from him really mean it and stick to controlling your life and protecting your kids. Take a stand to your life and kids life. You don't deserve to be in this situation at all your husband has chosen to waist his life away on alcohol and he needs help offer him the opportunity to get some help and if he does not seem to want it at the time then you must do what you have to do to care for your kids and yourself. When I say get the Police involved Im not talking about to prosecute your husband but it will help to let him know that your not going to put up with his bull and the police department can also recommend services to protect you and your kids. I hope to hear good news from you really soon just remember look out for you and your kids and do the right thing.
2007-10-10 10:03:59 · answer #1 · answered by mrshllnthny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dig through the yellow pages and look for shelters in your area or surrounding areas. If you do not see any listings than you can contact Children's Services and they will help you. Tell them you are basically homeless and need shelter now.
Alot of shelters are hidden from the public for your protection and may be closer than you think. You can also check on low income housing in your area and see what is available today.
Check with local authorities and see if you qualify for assistance to obtain a restraining order. Some areas can provide you an order at no cost to you. You could also have him removed from the home if that is an option you feel comfortable with. Call the police when he is a drunk and acting out. They will at least hold him overnight. If you are having trouble time wise with the above suggestions and have no family or friends who can help you than call a local pastor and see if they can assist you with a temporary place to stay. The main thing is to protect yourself and your children. Don't feel bad for him for what you are doing. In the long run you will be helping him also.
2007-10-10 09:53:58 · answer #2 · answered by CINDY J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RE:
I need help getting out of a bad marriage!!!?
My name is Jessica and I am 31 yrs old. I'm currently married with 3 young boys (8, 5, &18 mo.). My husband has become an alcoholic and is very verbally abusive to all of us and has begun smashing things in the house. I want really want to leave but have no resources to do so. I have been a...
2015-08-05 19:36:47 · answer #3 · answered by Indira 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call a woman's shelter, you take your kids and he will never find you. Get a restraining order as well and don't attempt to make any further contact with him. File for a divorce. Do you have family or friends in another state? Maybe talk to them, tell them honestly what is going on, maybe they will help you both financially and getting you all a place to stay.
2007-10-10 09:45:28 · answer #4 · answered by kelly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know where I'm from Catholic charities can help with something liek that or give you information for battered women's homes. Try calling a hotline for abuse and see if they can provide any helpful info. What about going back to you families? Stay with someone you know and trust that can protect you and help you out while you get on your feet. Good luck. Also, what about a church? They may know of someone...
2007-10-10 09:36:58 · answer #5 · answered by karamell08 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to a battered woman's shelter and take the kids. Then call Alcoholics Anonymous and have them direct you to the nearest Ala-non meeting. It's free and they have the best help for you anywhere.
You are sick too, just from living with him, so you need help so that even if you leave your current alcoholic you will not fall in with another one.
2007-10-10 09:36:31 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Use the National Domestic Violence Hotline to get information about the resources in your area. The number is 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE). You can also get some information using their website at www.ndvh.org. They can help you make an escape plan so that you can leave in a way that is safe both for you and your children. Good luck!!
2007-10-10 09:42:32 · answer #7 · answered by dlb_blair 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to him yet? Everyone here has gone straight to shelter and divorce but do you not want to save the marriage? Get him to get help, if he doesnt want to, THEN leave him..but you gotta give things a chance. You stuck with him this long without major problems till now right?
2007-10-10 10:00:26 · answer #8 · answered by noones 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing you must know is if you want to save your marriage and if you find yourself alone in this desire, waiting for the other spouse to make the first move is the beginning of the end. Learn here https://tinyurl.im/aHL2o If you are looking for someone to blame or someone else to put the emotional and physical work into saving the marriage, again, it's going to fail.
2016-04-22 14:12:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to get out. contact local churches and battered women facilities. Call up your local welfare office and see if they can direct you in a direction to help you become financially secure. Just don't wait around for him to start smashing up you and they boys!! None of you deserve this!! Good luck!!
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2007-10-10 09:43:42 · answer #10 · answered by Life*goes*on 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋