My friend just recently found out she was pregnant by a low life that just got out of prison (which is her typical dating style anyway). It's her fault because she didn't want to take birth control and he didn't like condoms so she let him not use them. She has a 18 month old son now (who she also did not want, but kept just to piss of her parents who are very racist) who is mixed black and white. As soon as she found out this time she called me & said she was going to have an abortion- I believe whole heartedly that the only reason for abortion should be in rape circumstances- she knows this. I told her my honest opinion and my mother offered to adopt her baby if she carried it (very serious about that offer btw). She said no & that she was hoping for a miscarriage. She went to her aunt's house and tried to induce a miscarriage with some sort of pill or herb and called me while she was doing it because she was feeling very sick. I told her tocall me when she was done doing whatever
2007-10-10 08:23:35 · 16 answers · asked by starlightstarbright 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
she was going to do. I feel kinda bad because I was very rude and hung upon her. Should I call her & appologize, or should I let her call me back atsome point? I reallydo not agree with herstance and I'm not sure if Iwant that kind of drama in my life at this point. She also missed my baby shower to do this miscarriage act after she had planned itfor me, so I had to have other people scramble around to get stuff done for it. But thatis definetely NOT why I was angry, it just added to it.
2007-10-10 08:26:20 · update #1
My question was- Should I call her or cut ties with her?
2007-10-10 08:35:26 · update #2
She needs counseling. Refer her to Planned Parenthood or any agency in your town that deals with unwed mothers. She cold hurt herself or damage a child which is carried to term.
2007-10-10 08:27:18 · answer #1 · answered by Stimpy 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Aborting your own fetus is against the law thats murder in a lot of states. I had a friend who gave one kid up for adoption then got pregnant again and tried anything she could to have a miscarrage on her own I never talked to her again. If she wants an aborttion she needs to pay the money to have one done by someone who knows what they are doing because she could kill herself she trys on her own. I say talk with her about other options like adoption by someone other then your mom it would be hard for her to know your mom has her baby all the time so maybe she should find a couple she does not know threw an adoption facility and do things the right way. Its not the babys fault she was dumb and did not use protection and its not fair how easy it is for some people to use abortion as there birth controll pills maybe after this she should have a doctor give her the shoot or diapram that last 5 years. Good luck to you its gotta be hard to deal with that.
2007-10-10 08:31:13 · answer #2 · answered by Amy D 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's awful that she's doing that however I would question if she is telling the truth or just trying to irritate you. If a baby is healthy and is going to stick it's very difficult to cause a miscarriage/abort by any other way other than medical. She is more likely to hurt herself or take something that will give her an unhealthy but live child which would be a real shame.
It would be in your best interest to cut ties with this person. She has some real issues and seems extremely selfish. You can only help a person so much and only if they want your help which clearly she doesn't.
2007-10-10 08:30:50 · answer #3 · answered by Melissa S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
does she not realise that is she tries to self abort it could kill her too...if she really does not want to keep this child then she should go to a proper place and have it done..she will hurt herself if she tries to do it herself...i too am not happy about abortion and i agree with you about the rape circumstances, she needs someone right now and your her only hope so go and see her an try to talk her into going to a clinic instead of doing it herself,...there are alternative contraception these days, she does not have to go on the pill, there's injections and implants now even condoms, if you are her best friend maybe you should suggest that she should consider her choice in men too...she's worth more than that, i cannot comment on her other child because what you said about her having her child of of spite made me feel mad because that's what my mother told me recently, that she had me out of spite so that hit a nerve, but if she does not want this other child then i think she should think about adoption or fostering...she is a careless girl hun, she should think about the consequences instead of making babies that she does not want...she is a grown woman and should know better....go and see if she's OK....if she is no better by the morning then get her to see a doctor she could be endangering herself and her unborn child....
2007-10-10 08:37:06 · answer #4 · answered by Dazzlebox 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How horrible. It would be so much better if she would let your mother adopt this baby! I have a very best friend who got an abortion and she lives with the guilt every single day and wishes she could take that back! It kills her soul now to think she had ever done that. She's trying to do this at home abortion and what if this child survives this and ends up with serious problems. She would be faced with that every time she looked in its eyes. Oh, its horrible and I pray she stop messing with mother nature and give this child a life. You need to write back and keep us posted on this matter. Thanks and God bless!
2007-10-10 08:31:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Thats horrible. I totally agree with you. Abortion is wrong. She needs to seek help and if she doesnt you need to let the authorities know. She could permanently damage her body or worse she could end up carrying the baby to term and it would have some kind of problem or deformity. Dont let her do this! Let her know she has other options and that 90% of woman who have abortions regret them. There are over 100,000 couples who want a baby to adopt each year in the US and less than 25,000 up for adoption in a year! Many people would love to have that baby even if she doesnt!
Here are some helpful links! Best of luck and I will be praying for you, your friend and the baby.
http://www.angeladoptioninc.com
Your friend should look at this site:
http://www.abortiontv.com
2007-10-10 08:31:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
So what's your question? Are you worried that your friend will end up killing herself with these weird herbs? Or are you concerned that your judgmental attitude against something you've never even had to experience has driven your friend to an early grave? Maybe having unprotected sex with an ex-con isn't the smart thing to do, but if you were her real friend you wouldn't get down on her about it. You would leave your opinions at the door and just listen to your friend, who is obviously very scared and alone right now. It's nice that your mom offered to adopt this baby, but it's not just about the end result. A pregnancy is an all-consuming condition that lasts nearly a year and can disrupt a woman's life in so many ways- making her have to leave her job if health problems arise, for one thing. Maybe she simply can't afford to be pregnant. Try to see it from her side if you want to be a true friend.
2007-10-10 08:33:31 · answer #7 · answered by fizzygurrl1980 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Its sounds like she does need a lil counseling or maybe she should visit a planned parenthood clinic, If there are any in your area. But if she is your friend then you should not be judging her for her mistake, yes i agree that this is her fault. But she needs to make decisions for her self, and if you truly are her friend then you would be there for her whether you agree with her or not. She can probably really use a freind right now, im sure she has enough people judging her. Maybe you should try to be there for her and give her support (not support for her abortion if you dont agree with it) but support to do what she feels is right and support to get her life together so she does not keep making these mistakes.
2007-10-10 08:34:26 · answer #8 · answered by ★★pixie★★ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your friend is a douchebag. Her kids are going to have horrible lives. If she really cared about her 18 month old, she'd give him up for adoption. Having a kid to piss off her parents? She's incredibly immature and FAR too stupid to raise kids.
If you really care about her and she refuses to take up your mom on the adoption offer, you should take her to an abortion clinic. It would be much better to have a clean, safe abortion than to have your friend possibly kill herself trying to kill her child. Hoping for a miscarriage is just going to make your friend miserable and give a kid a miserable life.
2007-10-10 08:29:20 · answer #9 · answered by No one important 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
ok first off, shes a total jealous *****. if she really cared about u she would be spending all the time she can hav with u before she leaves. because of this she's obviousli not ur friend. u should b happy that shes leaving. dont say sorri cos u didnt do anything, it would just make u look like a fool and she would be happy that she got the attention from u. about handling it, well just go on living and dont care about her. she will realize that she made a stupid mistake. ul b fine as soon as she goes
2016-05-21 00:22:45 · answer #10 · answered by shari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋