Why do people who reproduce say that the childfree by choice are selfish?

Question

Isn't it more selfish to bring more people into this world that's so unfair and violent?

Answer 1

I am so "Childfree" that I knew it when I was 15. I started seeking a vasectomy when I turned 18, and succeeded when I was 21. I have been called selfish, gay, communist, heathen, and so on.

People whom are loving parents that planned their children, help them study, and so forth, are uncommon. They know what sacrifices it takes to be a "real parent". But they are few and far between. They do not call us selfish like the others do.

The majority of parents are of the type that have no business having children at all. They had accidents and therefore never completed their education. The suffer financially as a result. They see our education, our vacation photographs, new cars and so forth. Many are jealous. They wish they had made the choices we did.

They are unhappy because we represent one out of every five Americans. More young people are joining with us, and that means our voting power is increasing. We don’t vote for the causes they find close to their hearts (public assistance, etc).

They also don’t want their young adult children exposed to us. If their children see our standard of living, they will also become “Childfree”. That means the breeders might never become grandparents.

Some of the worst haters of the “Childfree” are single parents. They feel contempt for us because we keep them out of our “dating zone”.

Answer 2

I think not having children is the opposite of selfish especially if you don't have the time and/or money to support them emotionally, financially, etc. I don't plan of having children for a number of reasons, but I find it ironic how so many people think I'm a bad person for not wanting kids. No one gives me a valid reason for being a bad person solely for not wanting kids, but I can list a bunch of reasons as to why I'd rather not have kids: Overpopulation, stressful life, major irreversible responsibility, lack of independence or freedom, and living in a bad economy that may never end in our lifetime. Personally, not having kids makes a lot of sense for economic reasons unless you're financially well-off and have the leeway to actually take the time to care for your kids. Anyway, people who want kids should have that choice, but it's a good idea to understand the major responsibilities and commitment involved. In other words, having kids isn't something people should take lightly.

Answer 3

I don't know why people say that. Personally I think it's stupid to see either choice as selfish. We should all have a choice. Some people really desire to have children, some people have no such desire. Neither group is any better or worse than the other. Reproducing has both pros and cons. I think people should be less judgemental and just respect each other's choices.

Answer 4

I don't know why some people say that. I believe everyone has a choice to have children or not. Some people who have children actually should not, since they do not take care of them themselves. I have three children by choice, do not want more, and am able to do for them what they need. I don't believe I am selfish and neither is my best friend who choses to be a mother of a cat and not real children. Each to his/her own, Everyone must respect the choice of others.

Answer 5

I can see a person who can't bear children being angry/jealous, but why people who can have kids? Its everyone's right to choose not to have children until they are financially and mental capable. Some people just don't like children, which is their choice.
Who knows, it may actually really be a non-selfish choice. I know a couple who are both sickle-cell carriers and its a 75% chance their offspring will have full blown sicklecell, so they have stayed child free on purpose.

Answer 6

I haven't heard that before, but I have heard "As an upstanding citizen and a well-balanced person it is your responsibility to rear children". What a load! I think the world would be a better place if people who shouldn't be having kids stopped having kids rather than if all the people in the world who could have kids did.
Good parents can help a child adapt to the harshness and coldness and violence of the world.

Answer 7

Have you ever hear an educated person say that you are selfish? I have not.

It never fails that some friends' cousin, brother, sister, or friend, or new mail clerk at work, will call me selfish. They are almost always the type that never finish high school because they had a baby.

Misery loves company. If they can somehow convince you to lower your standard of living to theirs, then they feel better about themselves.

Answer 8

Because they're sharing their lives with others,
while the other people are living with only one other person or by themselves. They might see it as selfish because they have ot devote so much time and energy int their "family" and the other single/couples don't have to, and because they have not had kids by choice it makes them look a little selfish in the perspective of the family man/woman.

Answer 9

How about both groups not asking such a personal question and putting a value judgment on the other?
If they're childless; if it's by choice, or they're unable to conceive, it's none of my business.
If they have children, it's none of my business, either.

Answer 10

Good question, I don't why they say that?
I agree completely about bringing children into the world at this time!