i just started a new job about 3 weeks ago and though it has been 3 weeks i still feel like i dont fit in,
in my first 2 weeks i worked with about 5 guys, out of them only 2 of them i kinda got along with, the rest well you know
Anyway this week i was moved to a diffrent area and have been working with one of the older workers, he's alright but theres always going to be that "show respect thingy" so i couldnt relax and be myself.usually at lunch time i go out the back of the workshop and have lunch but since i dont know anyone i just stand there away from the rest of the guys alone,i dont know what to say to them and when they are all having a conversation amongst eachother i think to myself that none of what they are saying interest me so how the heck am i going to get along with them. today at lunch they all went upstairs i on the other hand was down stairs alone,i mean completely,nobody pays any attention to me except one guy,i see from time to time.how do you get by these times?
2007-10-10 00:38:13 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You need more age. #
2007-10-10 00:41:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I happen to be outgoing, so I am comfortable approaching and hanging out with anyone on a professional basis.
In your case, its clear you feel awkward, and really it sounds like they aren't really that cool (nice). Nevertheless, here's my advice:
Make it a point to enter their group and say something to let them know that you want to get to know them like " Well you guys, I've been here a couple weeks, and I like it alot. I'm hoping to get to know you guys better, so I thought I would join you all for lunch."
Then..........the important thing to make them feel open to you...is to let them talk about themselves. Ask them questions like: So what do you do ? How long have you worked here? Happy here? Got any advise for me as the new guy? Maybe ask advise on work projects, tell them what you are doing and ask them what they think, or how they handle the job.
Don't be afraid to tell them that you feel a little awkward, but that it hasn't ever stopped you making friends.
As you get to know them, you will be more comfortable.
I hope they turn out to be nice.
And if there seems to be an extended issue, ask em' point blank.. " Whats up, I cant seem to fit in around here although I am trying" " I would like to be a team player and maybe learn from you guys".
And lastly, it is possible, that in fact, they dont have, or don't think they have anything in common with you personally.
That means that on a personal level, most likely you wont have anything in common with them either. So, dont let that bug you. Just be yourself, do your job and maintain your own personal life, and dont let it bother you.
Good luck. And hey, the older guy....try making some jokes and having fun with him. Dont be so uptight about the respect thingy. He's a just a guy too. You two might just hit it off around work and older people can have influence and experience to help you.
2007-10-10 08:00:12 · answer #2 · answered by Jude F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just hang in there. It's like being the new kid in class. It will work out. These guys have been working together for a while. Maybe you can bring up a good football game or baseball game. Something that will break the ice. Another good idea is to bring some home made cookies or something from home. People always like those.
2007-10-10 07:44:23 · answer #3 · answered by just me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh so you're not one of the cliche yet. I've worked with people like this-making you feel left out - well get your friends to come and meet you after work to go for a drink - let them see you have your own friends. My husband works with a cliquey lot and when we go out for meals or a dance they leave me standing on the dance floor alone but I don't let them see it bothers me I usually phone up a friend and invite them to join me - and when I throw parties or bbqs at home I never invite them - now THAT bothers them! - but make sure they all know what's happening. If all else fails - look for another job.. Hope this helps and have a nice day :) x
2007-10-10 07:48:21 · answer #4 · answered by Soup Dragon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you like your job and intend to work permanently, try to do the first move to introduce yourself.. you have no choice because everyday you see these people everyday. Anyway you're still new in that office and it's natural that you feel awkward(?) or maybe shy(?)...
What is important you do your best in your work ..but it is also important that you get along well with your co-employees.
Well, I know you can do it, and wish you good luck!!
2007-10-14 07:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by jmjm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had a few jobs like that too.
Some people are unsociable, and others are just shy.
The point is that you have a job. If you don't like your job, get another one, but don't concern yourself too much about your colleagues.
Make more of an effort to socialise, talk with them, crack a joke or something, ask about themselves.
Best of luck anyways.
2007-10-10 07:46:26 · answer #6 · answered by Mike D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been in that situation myself. It's a pity that they aren't being more friendly to you. Eventually a new person will start and you won't be the new guy anymore. In the meantime just keep doing a good job and people will warm to you soon.
2007-10-10 07:47:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suck it up and be a man.
Do you job and focus on the Mission.
You ARE the 'Greenhorn', the 'New-Guy', 'The Jeep' the 'Newbie" ... get it?
So relax and get into it ... Make your bones or ... Quit.
2007-10-10 07:43:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
bring cookies and at lunch offer all a cookie. maybe you just need to break the ice. they may feel it is you who doesnt want to belong.
2007-10-10 07:42:24 · answer #9 · answered by Aloha_Ann 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just try to be yourself.why don't you ask them if they mind if you sit with them at lunch.they won't bite.
2007-10-10 07:42:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋