Is it better to be feared, or loved, if you can't be both?

Question

As a leader or a boss, is it better to be feared? or loved? if you can't be both.
And why did you decide what you did?

macchiavelli was an interesting man.

to answer 1. don't corner the dog (read about the ancient charioteers rule - from Art of War by Sun Tzu)

to answer 2. it doesn't matter why they follow you, as long as they do. they'll only love you until you piss them off. at least if they fear you and you piss them off, they still fear you.

A real life example:
George W. Bush is a popular elected leader was loved (enough to be elected).... no people want him gone and are not afraid to get rid of him.
Saddam Hussein was feared and it was impossible for his people to get rid of him. It took an external military to do that.

So what approach should a leader take if they want to stay in power?

to answer number 7. - Bush WAS loved (enough to get elected). That he is no longer loved is my point... as a leader sometimes you will need to do something unpopular and then the love disappears. fear however, would still remain.

But the answers are getting better.

to answer number 8. i like your honesty... despite love not lasting, you would rather be peacefully deposed than be feared, hated and captured.

answer 12.... in terms of leadership, to be popular and to be loved are one and the same... no one loves a leader like family really... and if they do, they are deluded and have been successfully influenced by a political campaign.
And to those that think that fear doesn't get you anything, think again.

Niccolo Macchiavelli wrote a book called "The Prince" in which he claims it is better to be feared than loved if you can't both.

That doesn't make him right, but he has some very good points.

He also says that it is better to appear to be virtuous, but vice will get you further. It explains how many politicians take power, stay in power and fall from power. The same can apply in business and employment.

Answer 1

As a leader, feared. that's how it works in the world, do you think some of the successful powerful leaders got respect by being hapilly didally sunshine that everyone loved and perrsuaded ppl to follow then because it would make them happy,and they won't get their feelings hurt, no! they stood their grounds, stayed strong, was firm, feared but even more respected, but most of all reasonable and logical, and reason and logic is what makes the world fuction and the key necessities to leading and fear contains those, love doesn't, love is unreasonable and unlogical, it goes by feelings. it would be nice just to have ppl follow because they love you and want to make you feel all warm inside, but this is the real world and things don't work that way, if ppl were really that conciderate we wouldn't need leaders to keep ppl in line, but that's not to be counted on.

Answer 2

the love George dubbya apparently had before being elected was more like popularity.. he didn't exactly Do anything to earn people's "love" in the first place..

so are you asking about love or popularity? do you think it's popularity that keeps leaders in their positions or genuine love?

ideally a leader ought to be loved by his subjects or subordinates. They would do as he/she wished just to please him/her.. if they genuinely love their leader mistakes can be forgiven.. of course that kind of position can be exploited and abused, since we don't live in an ideal world.. but that's another topic altogether..

leading by fear isn't all that it's cracked up to be either.. sure Saddam was feared but look where he is now.. and look where his people are now.. since he apparently had to be removed by foreign military intervention they were left with nothing, and now their country is completely screwed..

how about a combination of both fear and love? as the saying goes: "speak softly and carry a big stick"..
wasn't it Al Capone who said:" You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone."
but then again those are just different types of fear tactics.. and look where that eventually got Capone..

Answer 3

I would like to be loved instead of being feared. We can be a leader without being feared and who care about the feelings of the subordinates. Respect is bestowed to a man who knows how to deal others with human touch!!!

Answer 4

I prefer loved.
If your feared,then while your around,people will fear you but behind your back,that fear will turn to resentment and then to revenge.The minute there is a chip in your armour,those that feared you will use that weakness against you.Either by themselves or by helping out others to exploit it.Those that fear you will not protect you under those circumstances.Sadam was feared and yes it took a while to get him,but when those that feared him saw a way out,they used it.

If you are loved (and BUSH isnt btw),those that love you will protect you

Answer 5

Both love and fear compliment each other. To love something, is also to fear for it. To fear for something, shows that you love it or care for it. Both also bring out the best potientials in anybody when it's needed.

Edit: As a leader, you should gain both from your followers. Love more for your followers and fear more from your enemies.

Answer 6

loved! think about it! what does being feared get you?, very little, but it can make people do things for you quickly and properly but so can love, if you, as a boss, were loved, people would want to do things for you quickly and properly, and they would also have job satisfaction whiled doing it because they don't feel like the little man, the 'controlee', the one with no power or opinion!

Answer 7

It is better to be loved cuz then u will have peace of mind & will never be alone.
On the other side, if we talk about reality, it is better to be feared cuz no one in this world cares for anyone. All the people are worried only about themselves and nothing else.

Answer 8

It really depends. I would pick to be feared as long as that state was not so overwhelming as to incapacitate the "workers." Likewise, I would also pick loved as long as that love was not so lustful and sexual as to have the "workers" drooling over me rather than doing their "work." (unless the work is to drool over me).

Thus, I would take moderate fear over extreme love or moderate love over extreme fear. If the choice is between moderate fear or love, I'd go with fear because many people are fickle with their love but few ever get over their anxieties.

Answer 9

Loved. Fear gets you some results in the short run but in the long run people give more for those whom they love.

Answer 10

As a leader I would rather my employees fear me but, not as a matter of ill consequence for misconduct but, out of respect for my position of leadership.