I feel so alone after therapy sessions?

Question

When I go in I am usually bouncing off the walls and it takes me forever to calm down and try to figure out what I wanted to talk about. Then when its about time to go I start opening up a bit then the session is done with. This has been a problem before but its preventing me from moving forward with therapy. Its a few days after sessions that I feel like crap and alone with my emotions. I dont want to talk with my therapist sometimes because Im tired about talking about things. Talking doesnt seem to be doing much and I dont know what I can start doing. I try and take all her advice but there is this huge ball of pain inside me and sometimes I feel like the little puppy dog wandering around lost without a home. I dunno does anyone else run into this problem when it comes to therapy? I just want to move forward so I can start opening up to people and doing the things I want to do.

Answer 1

I think that the therapy is probably pulling some buried emotions to the surface and many emotional problems are the result of burying feelings. It sounds like the therapy is doing what it is designed to. And you are probably quite accurate when you describe a "huge ball of pain". It needs to be chipped away slowly. Imagine if it all came to the surface at once. That would be too much to bear. I used to go in to see a therapist feeling chipper because I was so good at covering everything over. The therapist quickly got through that defense and it's not fun, but necessary in the long run to feel better. It's not easy. Talk to your therapist about it. I f you go more often, expect those feelings more often. I think it's just part of healing. Hang in there.

Answer 2

In order to make the most of your time in therapy, you might want to bring a journal to your sessions. Arrive early and journal for ten minutes directly before and then for a few minutes after. That way you can start to calm down before you are with your therapist and will have a better idea what is really on your mind when you start the session. Journaling afterwards will allow you to continue the your work a little longer and will also give you a reference for where to start the next week. Also maybe having your journal with you between sessions will give you an outet so as not to feel so alone. I hope that helps!

Answer 3

Print this out and take it to your therapist. You may need more, or longer, sessions. Usually, it takes a few minutes to get into things in a session, then most of the time is spent dealing with the heavy emotions you don't want to deal with alone, and the end of therapy is about pulling things back together enough to go out into the world, continue to work on you 'stuff' but not be overwhelmed.

Answer 4

Unfortunately, therapy is 90% perspiration on your part. The harder you work at it, the faster you find peace. It sounds like your "bouncing off the walls" is a way for you to avoid the issue you are seeking to fix.

My suggestion, tell your therapist exactly what you wrote in your question. Word for word. This will start your dialogue and help you get right to the point.

Also, you must, must, must create a support system for after your treatment. Find two to three people you trust to be around that can help keep you busy. Of course you can talk about your progress with them, it's your life. Being alone is not recommended. Focus on doing special things with those who support you. Set a time frame to "hang out" and you'll notice less loneliness.

Answer 5

Yes, there are times I have felt very alone, very filled with pain. Honestly, I think everyone feels just like you do, at times, but most of us don't share that with others, it's no fun admitting how vulnerable and lonely I am.

Therapy is hard work and your counselor is just there to facilitate you while you do the work, a guide - so to speak. It takes you so much time to relax and let yourself open up that there is insufficient time to work on the issue. Ask yourself, "what am I so afraid of"? I have found that sometimes, even though I want help, I get in my own way.

I have found writing things down gets them out of my head. When I can read them I sometimes see things I didn't get when my thoughts just churned around inside of me - patterns that repeat or issues that keep coming back, or problems with certain kinds of situations or people....

At times I've had to evaluate my time with certain therapists and make decisions about moving on or staying. It took me a long time to find someone with whom I could work most effectively, and whose philosophy and style were compatible with mine.

Bottom line: It's tough for you, but you are doing a good thing by getting help. I respect you for doing something constructive for yourself. You will not always feel like you do now. Things will improve. I wish you well!!!

Answer 6

I know this will sound a little cheesy, but it helped me.
Have you ever thought about journaling, not like "Dear Diary" but simply writing down your thoughts and feelings, the things that you feel are holding you back. Jot them down during the time between sessions, that way when you go to your therapy, you have something to draw from. It's almost like it helps you focus more if you know ahead of time what you need to tackle during a session, instead of spending the first 40 minutes of a 50 minute appointment trying to get your thoughts together and trying to open up.
It's just a thought, but I hope you find something that helps you!

Answer 7

How long have you been going to see this person? It might be time for you to start looking for a new therapist. Also, for a lot of people you can get an equal amount of fulfillment from opening up to a close friend or religious adviser as you can with a therapist.

Answer 8

I tried it once, about twenty years ago, and I left feeling silly.To this day I wonder what that woman was thinking as I sat there making an *** of myself.

Answer 9

I felt like that too.

Answer 10

I'll pray for you.