A Silent Cry For Help!?

Question

Whenever someone at school talks to me, it's like I want so much to be able to speak this time, but I can't make anything come out. Sometimes there's something simple I want to say to my mom or my friend but I have to force it out because I'm afraid to. My mom has always talked for me when I couldn't. I get nervous at the thought of people starting to talk to me at school. When somebody says they like my shirt or something I want to say thank you but all I can do is stare at them. I had like a panic attack before girl scouts because my mom was gonna leave me there alone and then when they wanted me to introduce myself I couldn't say a word. I want to talk to my mom about all my problems but all I could say was "Do you think something's wrong with me?" People always say it's just shyness that I'll grow out of. People ALWAYS tell me they used to be shy. I truly doubt they came close to what I feel every day. I'll be back with more information....

I'm afraid to ask for help with work at school. I always nod to say yes or no.
I can't stand up for myself unless it's to someone I know won't harm me in any way. I fear talking on the phone. I'm not afraid to talk at home but even then I'm silent and I'm not comfortable talking about my favorite things. At school I try not to let my voice be heard; I can't say the Pledge of Allegiance out loud! I have extremely low self-esteem and I always felt like I was the one who was different. I feel exactly like the people who post their questions about extreme shyness and selective mutism. I fear that YOU, the person reading this, can't begin to understand the severity of my problems. Do you KNOW the somber feeling that I feel whenever I let myself down AGAIN? When I can't talk AGAIN? Do you know the loneliness? The feeling of helplessness? I still feel this is inadequate, but at least, I'll show it to my mom and hope that she can finally understand how I feel.

LOL I'm never going to leave this question alone : )...I'll probably be back again!

I'm even sitting here right now trying to ask my mom to come read this but I can't! I'd like to thank everyone who gives a good answer and I'll be back.

Answer 1

I suffer from the same thing. Im in college - look popular but once you get to know me you see Im plagued by anxiety. I'm always unfocused, jittery. I have great friends but feel Im losing them. When I converse w/ others I blank out and what I saw just comes out without thought. It sucks and Im trying to cope thru moodgym.org --type it in google -- its cognitive therapy CBT plus by taking Anxietol 7 !!! I want to be free that's all I ask for...

Answer 2

Write down what you want to say to your mom and give it to her. Or...see if you can make a cassette tape talking to her. At least you'll have some kind of communication going with your mom. As for other people..I've found it's usually hard to get a word in edgewise with them..without interrupting them. SOME PEOPLE TALK TOO MUCH !! Better to be like you than to be like them. Maybe if someone gives you a compliment again and you can't talk..just try to smile. That will be a kind of a "thank you".

Answer 3

I don't think anything is wrong with you... it just sounds like you have lost your voice. From what you are saying it seems more like you got used to having someone else speak for you instead of you speaking for yourself. You are not living in shyness you are living in more like a shadow of fear. Good news is you don't have to. Bad news is, it will be a hard behavior to push through. A couple suggestions for you to hopefully help you through this... try to get into a reading group or speech group in your community or better yet theatre. I know the idea is absolutely terrifying but think about this- you don't have to think about what to say on stage, words are still given to you. You will be meeting new people- who have no pre-concieved notion about you and you can be yourself, and use that time to find your voice. If you go the route of volunteer reading in your community, you are again, talking to new people, not having to think about what to say... the practice will go a long way and what you are doing will also give you additional confidence as well as do a lil something for your local community. I would suggest you talk to your speech therapist at school or your school councelor- they are there for you... and they can offer more face to face help for you. If you need to write them an email explaining what is going on if that is easier. Another thing you could think about doing - keeping a journal. and after you write in it read it out loud. It will help you give your thoughts more power and your head more practice saying your thoughts/opinions out loud.
I am not sure, but you could probably find an interest project in this somehow as well. (another thing to help boost your voice's confidence)
*you don't grow out of being shy- you just realize that everyone wants acceptance , you also get more practice and confidence in being yourself and as years progress hopefully you trust it and choose to be more open to sharing that with the world... so it looks like growing out of the shyness

Just remember, there is nothing wrong with you. You are going through a lil social fear hiccup that will pass eventually. The more you stress over it, the worse it will get. Trust in yourself, let those around you who love you support you, and use those in your community to help you out with what is going on. This too shall pass....

Answer 4

You propose, you're hurtin' on the interior? this is alright to experience what you experience. do so, technique it, and enable it bypass. despite is providing you with grief; it has a answer or this is right here that might actually assist you advance greater advantageous on your adventure. probable the two. Ebb and pass. For now, enable those tears out. this is fairly healing. I even have stumbled on that as quickly as I arise to discomfort,(emotional or actual) it intensifies. Roll with it and next factor you realize, you're confronted with the opportunities of a clean day. practising gratitude makes for a speedy restoration too. The darkest hour is purely till now the daybreak. Happiness is yours! Sending mucho love for exhilaration regained!

Answer 5

Yes, print this out. You don't have to say anything to your mother just hand her the print out. If you don't want to do that then leave it on her bed or the kitchen table or somewhere she will find it.

Or write a note that says "I asked a question on yahoo answers 'A silent cry for help' I hope my mom reads it". Then hand her the note or leave it some where she will find it.

Answer 6

I have this problem too. Don't worry, there's nothing wrong with you. I find the best thing to do is journal; My mom got me started on it. Just write. Doesn't have to be deep thinking or anything, just write. When you're comfortable with it, write out how you feel, and give it to your mom or a councilor. Good luck, babe.

Answer 7

Hello, you are not alone when it comes to this. You may have something called Social Anxiety. Ask your mom to take you to a therapist. You will feel so much better.
Good luck

Answer 8

Print your question out and then ask your Mum to read it.

You can leave the room while she reads it if you feel uncomfortable.

This really says it all and will help if you can let her see how much distress you are in.

She will come and find you once she has read it.

Please try - you need help and deserve to get it.

Answer 9

this is social anxiety and i battle with it to probably not as severely but i hate going to supermarkets or places were there is a crowd i get all sweaty and nervous i just try my best to control it im going to a therapist next month to get an evaluation to see if i can get better. hope you feel better

Answer 10

It sounds like Social Anxiety to me. Can you talk to your doctor about it? You may benefit from an anti-anxiety medication. It's worth a shot.