I don't want to know what an awful person I am because I am not. Don't insult me you don't understand!
I just want to know how to break up a marriage. I have been working with "Joe" for two years and I am in love with him. I know in my heart that we were meant to be together. We talk, we do the same type of work, and we enjoy the same things. His wife is not in this field, she doesn't like to do most stuff that he does, and they were not meant to be together.
He talks about her and I hear them on the phone when she calls or he calls her and it breaks my heart. No they are not fighting, it is usually about the house or thier kids (yes I listen sometimes but only hear his side of the conversation). When he goes away on business trips I want to be the one who goes with him, but he takes his wife.
How can you break up a marriage? They have been married for 16 years and have 2 kids. I don't know anything about her except what he tells me which has been nothing that I can use.
2007-10-09 10:47:21 · 15 answers · asked by onthego72 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I appreciate all the answers even the ones that were critical. I approached "Joe" and let him know what I felt, I thought it best. He told me that I was a nice person but he was in love with his wife and he always would be, while he appreciated that I thought I was his sole mate-he had already found her but he was flattered. I am transfering departments so he will not be uncomfotable with me, but now I have to figure out how to get over this.
Thanks everyone
2007-10-11 20:07:13 · update #1
I don't think you are an awful person. I'm a married man who met my soul mate and wanted to leave and marry her, but I couldn't at the time because of my finances (4 kids). My soul mate didn't want to be a "home wrecker" so she withdrew and moved on. Now we are both miserable. I feel trapped and she is alone. It's a hard decision, but if my soul mate had hung in there with me, I would have eventually found a way to be with her, but because of all the negative garbage she got from "friends", she gave up. I hope you find a way to make this work.
2007-10-09 11:07:44 · answer #1 · answered by Greg G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think we do understand. You are in love with this man who is also married with a wife and family. I am not saying you are an awful person; you are being honest. Ask yourself this - Can you really live with the knowledge that you devistatingly harmed not only his wife but his children? You think you feel bad; that is nothing compared to being cheated on or having daddy move out. Don't think many people on YA's will be sympathetic as we believe in truth, honesty, and integrity. Keep doing what you are doing and you'll break them up, but at what cost to them, to the man you love and to yourself?
2007-10-09 10:59:03 · answer #2 · answered by pussycat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds like he's in a great marriage and nothing you do will change that so frankly you need to move on. Just because you have work in common with him doesn't mean you have anything else in common with him.
You need to find out why you attach yourself to people you can't have.
You need to think past yourself in this instance because there are children involved. If you did anything malicious to make his wife want to divorce him you'd be tearing a family apart and ruining the lives of his children. Do you want that on your head? To know you caused emotional hurt to his children?
I can garuantee that should whatever you do work and he does divorce and get with you it won't last more than a year.
2007-10-09 11:00:20 · answer #3 · answered by pamalalauren 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't break up their marriage. Even if you managed to separate them, he wouldn't stay with you. You are the other women, he toy and chances are that is all you ever will be. Remember one thing if he cheats on her with you, he'll cheat on you with someone else. Sounds like he loves his wife and kids, and your conning yourself if you think they don't have anything in common, they have 16 years and kids in common. Other then work and chat what have you got with him? They have something you never will " history". I don't mean to seem rude or anything but, you should do yourself a favor and find someone else who is married with children. Why would you want to be so selfish, and ruin their lives. They have done nothing to you and you have no right to interfear in their lives let alone ruin it. Grow up, how would you feel if that was your husband?
2007-10-09 10:59:32 · answer #4 · answered by Moe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he wanted out, he would get out himself...There is nothing you can do...Best thing is not to get involved with a married man, it doesn't work no matter how much you have in common. I'm not going to tell you your an awful person, you fell for a guys that's all ready taken...For your sake and sanity tho, i will tell you this...You can take whats not yours and not willing given...Its best to look else where...
2007-10-09 11:01:19 · answer #5 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel very sorry for you. Because YOU don't get it.
So you break him up from his wife. That doesn't mean you'll get him. Not only that, but whatever we do tends to seek us out, so if you DO get him, how do you know someone out there JUST LIKE YOU will do the same and take him from you?
I think it's time for people to take some responsibility for their actions. I wouldn't want to wear the title of "Homewrecker".
2007-10-09 10:51:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are a awful person ! Its none of your business how they conduct their marriage. Stay away from married men and stop trying to find ways to break up peoples marriages. anyway how do you know he would want anything to do with you?
2007-10-09 10:58:26 · answer #7 · answered by lovely 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to take a look at yourself. What you are doing is wrong. Here is a married man, who is happy, and not giving you any encouragement. Get a life and find a man elsewhere.
If you cant get your mind of this man - change your job so you arent with him all the time. If you LOVE him - do this for his sake.
2007-10-09 10:57:50 · answer #8 · answered by JazzE 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
has "joe" and you ever been physical or has he expressed interest in you?
if not just leave it alone, because you will end up hurting yourself
if you have, then talk to him and tell him how you feel about him and his wife.
BUT THINK ABOUT THE KIDS
2007-10-09 11:01:06 · answer #9 · answered by dido45dido 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh sorry...but you are a very stupid woman!! Why are you wasting your time on a married man? If he wanted to be with you...then he would leave his wife....and even if you were successful in breaking up his marriage...what makes you think he will want to be with you? You are very delusional...I suggest that you seek therapy now.....
2007-10-09 10:53:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋