What is your opinion about these complaints my boyfriend made about me?

Question

"-She will only pick up her stuff when I specifically tell her to
-She never cleans anything
-She won't do anything with the dishes
-She leaves crap lying everywhere
-Now she wants $3500 to go to Ecuador because she wants to try out some exotic men
-All she really does it just go to MySpace and be gay
-Once a month or so I find evidence of her complaining about me on the internet to random people

and the big kicker of all

-She wants sex all of the time, and if she doesn't get it all of the time, she whines, complains, and bitches to random people on the internet thinking that our relationship is falling apart*

But I love her anyway.

I wish I was gay"

He left this up on his computer by accident. This is all annoying because it's not true, none of it! How can he think all this crap is true? What should I do in this situation?

Remember this is very outragous because there is hardly any truth to it. I think it's because he does not know as well as he thinks he does?

Answer 1

First be completely honest with yourself. Do you procrastinate? Do you clean up everyday? (I am assuming you stay at home and so these responsibilities would fall to you)

Here's the thing, he probably wouldn't say these things for no reason. If he's the one that ends up cleaning things up most of the time, there's your reason. If you DO complain to friends on the internet, then there's another reason.

If this is all false, then I would get out of the relationship fast.

But it sounds to me like there's a lot of miscommunication going on. He doesn't seem to know what you want out of the relationship and it doesn't sound like you know what he really wants either. I suggest a sit down talk. Ask him why he thinks those things about you.

You can only change yourself, so if you can truly make an effort to change any short commings on your part it will be a step in the right direction. And I think you will find him more accomodating to you as well.

Pick up a copy of The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, it's very helpful.

Answer 2

Are you sure it was by accident? He probably did it on purpose, because he thought it would be sweet with the "I love her anyway." Haha. But, if you're sure he didn't, then either a) don't mention it to him, but make a point out of things over the next few weeks...really obviously pick up your stuff and keep saying "I hate leaving crap lying everywhere." or clean 24/7. Or, best of all, deny him the sex. That'll teach him.
or b) Talk to him straight up about it.

Good luck. =]

Answer 3

Yikes, he has some MAJOR issues. If none of it is true, he sure has an active imagination. I think you need to tell him you found it (accidentally) and ask him what he means. Just tell him you're 'concerned' about all the things he's said and ask him why he did it. Try not to get defencive. Try to listen. Make sure he doesn't change the subject and start putting it onto YOU... it's a great way to turn a conversation around and deflect the subject onto you so that all of a sudden you are talking about something completely different. You need to keep bringing him back to 'why did you say those things'. You can also say stuff like 'It makes me sad to hear those things, you hurt my feelings, I'm worried about us, is there something you need to tell me...' stuff like that. Good luck!

Answer 4

Maybe he left that up on purpose , so you can see how it feels when you do the things you do. Like vent to random ppl (as you are now) about your relationship.

Maybe you should talk too him about the way you feel and not other ppl this way yall can discuss the issues of the heart.

people who don't know you can give you advice only based on your side , while if you discussed it with the person you are involved with you will get to the bottom of things alot quicker.

If some of the things are true about you, then turn it around and think about if you were in his shoes .

Answer 5

Wow, he seems to have a really disillusioned view of your relationship!

Listen, seriously, anyone who would tell lies this extreme and this hurtful is not someone who loves you or deserves you. Tell him he has every right in the world to run off and be gay, because he doesn't love you, you don't talk about someone you love in such a disrespectful way!

You can and will do way better than him. Go be happy, let him learn from his mistakes and maybe he'll be a little more tactful to his next girlfriend. Good luck & best wishes!

Answer 6

If you wanna stay together you're going to have to talk through this. Stay in control though. Don't fall into the pitfalls inherent to emotional discussions. You know, the blame game & so on. Be the grown up and tell him that these things hurt your feelings. Be prepared to recieve some criticism but don't take it too personally. Good luck. :)

Answer 7

He was obviously talking about someone else... don't worry about it.

Perhaps he is reseaqrching a short story and guaging other people's reactions ot the situation.

But hey.. if you find out who it is... give us the contact details OK? Promise?
:)

Oh.. which parts do you say are not accurate.. surely not the part where you discuss it on the internet? Maybe that and teh "I still love her" are the only true parts and that's his way of telling you what's bugging him?

Answer 8

While none of that may be true there must be some truth in there somewhere for him to post something like that. Either that or he left it there for you to 'find accidentally' to see what you will do. You can either disregard what you found and see how he reacts or call him out on it and see how he reacts.

Answer 9

well if thats all true then it sounds like you have growing up to do. If it isn't true then just confront him about it. print it off and leave it somewhere he'll find it and at the bottom put a question mark and right really so like this ?REALLY? and then below just write love (whatever your name is) that way he knows that you saw and your not happy about it. hehe plus it will be entertaining for you to watchi him get scared

Answer 10

Sounds like a spoiled little brat to be honest. That reminds me of the stuff a girl I know pulls with her husband and she is a flat out spoiled brat.

I feel for you, it will only get worse in the future.