we have been dating for 4 months he told me he loved me twice when we were physical with each other then a few weeks later he said indirectly that when people feel vulnerable they say things like that...I don't wanna waste my time he's great and nobody us perfect but I feel like I can"t trust his feelings and I feel like ending it It was pretty much like he was playing with my feelings...he also said he loved me when we would talk on the phone and this was after we were physical. please share some insight.
2007-10-09 08:27:41 · 29 answers · asked by Ginger 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
side note: we are in a committed relationship...after two months I told him we needed to go our separate ways because he wanted to take things slow and I was ready for a committment so he said he didn't want to lose me and he wants a committment with me.
2007-10-09 08:50:10 · update #1
Sounds like he's having second thoughts. Real men don't say things they don't mean and there are many good men out there. Tell him you want to be in a relationship, you don't need to be in one. Tell him you know what you want in a relationship. One of the things you want is sincerity, no games or play on words. You want a man that is sure of himself and knows what he wants too. Cool it with him. Show him you walk the talk. Give him the time to think and decide. Remember, women can make our own decisions too. Meanwhile, you date and don't wait for him. If it is meant to be, it'll be. Good luck!
2007-10-09 08:39:40 · answer #1 · answered by curlies55 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look I was involved with a young lady that needed to here it. You know those words. I L--- Y--. Make sure you are not forcing him to say it. If you don't feel good with it follow your instincts.
It is much different for a guy than a girl.
Women have receive a man inside there body and therefor the feelings are felt deeper quicker and feeling are formed just based on that.
Men have outies and there is no lasting feeling after it is removed and put away. It is not until the women is gone, leaving or seeing some one else that men realize the Jewel they had.
Make a real connection with a man make him wait a while before you give up your most precious resource. especially knowing how in general women feel after they do the do. Besides its your body ... inside your body that can make you multiply don't just anyone in.
You will save your self a lot of head ache.
2007-10-09 15:42:22 · answer #2 · answered by Big Will 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think a lot of men have a difficult time expressing their feelings especially saying i love you . You shouldn't feel like his words meant nothing at a vulnerable time, that's when they mean the most. It may just be uncomfortable for him. As long as he said it with no force from you then just be happy he's said it at all. Don't pressure the guy to say things to make you happy. Go by his actions not by how many times he said he loves you. Don't get too caught up on this issue it seems pointless as long as he cares there's nothin to worry about..
2007-10-09 15:40:30 · answer #3 · answered by Ms. Iman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from a guy. You need to decide what you want. The physical or emotional or both. Guys will say things in the heat of the moment. Women do too but they mean it. I don't know how old you are, if you are young be careful and ride it out a little bit longer. If you are older then see if he will take you on a trip. That is a test to see how willing he is to do something for you. Something substantial. good luck
2007-10-09 15:38:53 · answer #4 · answered by Daniel C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's right: things like that can be uttered people are vulnerable. But wait, don't just end your relationship. (But you must cease doing this "physical" thing immediately)
Ending your relationship immediately will undermine your capacity to learn. Remember, you will gain more wisdom in this so that maybe, just maybe, you can use them on the same situation in the future. What you should do is to weigh out all the things that's been happening and probe him. Collate all your data. From there, you will know what will your next step be.
2007-10-09 15:34:19 · answer #5 · answered by indy450 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hm, is he 14? Honest men can be so damn frustrating!
Do you love him? I guess some man would better know this but maybe he THINKS he has to say that or you will feel like he used you. Course if you did it then you both did it so I do not see how one is using the other more. I guess I would be honest about it with him.
If you feel like him loving you is neccessary to be getting physical then I guess you owe him and yourself an apology for letting things happen.
If you do not care if he loves you but are just happy to share anyway then that needs to be said.
I certanily have done the deed with men I didn't love, it happens but I didn't expect them to pretend they did love me.
hope that helps
2007-10-09 15:39:32 · answer #6 · answered by Marie W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he probably does have some feelings for you, but does not want to rush into anything too serious because sometimes that can ruin everything. don't interrogate him or try to analyze or dig deeper into what he says. just let him say what he wants to say. just make sure u are getting what u need out of the situation. if he's good in bed, treats you like a queen, and you enjoy his company, then just let it be for a while. when it starts going into a year and u want more out of it, tell him. if he disagrees then move on then, right now is too soon though.
2007-10-09 15:34:21 · answer #7 · answered by shanee h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am the guy that has been in the position that ""HE"" is in right now --- you are being used and toyed with and his words are only part of his lure to get you back in the bed ..... DUMP this turkey today and do not ever take him back ... you deserve more than ""Mr. Turkey"" and just be patient and Mr. Right will be headed your way soon ... best of the day to you and I'm sorry that you wasted 4 months on a loser --- be on your own and you will be happier waiting for Mr. Right ...
2007-10-09 15:37:46 · answer #8 · answered by XTX 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont want to be the bearer of bad news but you need to dump him. It seems that he only wants to tell you that so you will keep givin up the pooty pooh. If love is what your tring to find, a man will share his feelings for you no matter where your at or what your doing. He will also be your best friend.
2007-10-09 15:34:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A guy that can only say "I love you", after sex, is only talking with his "little head". Sweetie, you don't need that. Spend some real time with him, some quality time, out of the bed...and see if he says "I love you" then. That will be the true test. If he has no desire to spend "time" with you, then just move on.
2007-10-09 15:33:38 · answer #10 · answered by M. Rod 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋