Would you ever foster or adopt children?

Question

If so why so?
If not why not?

sorry, I should have said yes I would, probably foster rather than adopt and probably specialist foster care due to my partner and I both having experience with 'difficult' children.

He has two of his own, I would like my own first but we would not rule it out for the future.

Answer 1

certainly, in fact, I have been a foster carer, and was for 3 years, had to give it up because we moved to spain, back in uk now, thought about doing it again, but we have my husbands 80 yr old mother living with us and it wouldnt be fair on her. We were specialist foster carers and fostered children that were hard to place, it was a 24/7 job, but it was very rewarding, some of the children are still in touch with us now. my husband still uses his experiences where he works now, he works at a residential centre for families who are in danger of having their children taken off them, and as a last resort, he has to try and teach them parenting skills.

Answer 2

I would not foster because I couldnt handle having to give back the child especially if I knew the child was from a difficult background and it would be too hard on my two girls to lose a new sister or brother because I know they would also get attached.
I would adopt
Id love to so would my husband
but it takes many years which is ok but also LOTs of money which we dont have.If we could legally adopt a child in a simple way with only minimal legal involvement and costs we would do it we would adopt a downs syndrome child too if one came along as we have friends who adopted two downs children and they are a lovely family.
Sadly it comes down to money and not whether you can offer love and a stable family environment.

Answer 3

Yes I would both adopt and foster children because there are so many children out there that deserve to be taken care of and loved for who they are, I have a big heart there is plenty of room.

After working with children for such a long time I know what goes on out there and if I can help even just one child lead a happier life I will by whatever means necessary.

Answer 4

I would consider adoption in the future, although I want to have my own kids so I would have to make sure I had time to devote to another child. Also, I think I would try to adopt from my own country first (Ireland) before looking to adopt elsewhere. I am aware that this can be very hard to do though as they are very strict with regulations about whom can adopt (and rightly so). Also, to be perfectly honest (and probably make myself sound terrible), I dont think I would adopt a severly disabled child. That sounds terrible I know but I dont know if I could cope with a child of mine being like that (big up to anyone who can, you get all the praise and respect in the world from me). I dont think would foster, my friends mum fostered for years. Once had a baby from when he was 3 weeks old, they asked to adopt him but were turned down and he was adopted by another couple at the age of 9 months. She said it totally broke her heart and she never fostered again...I dont think I could bring a child into my home and love it like my own and then have to give it back (once again big respect for people who have the ability to do that, were would we be without ya).

Thats just what I think....

Answer 5

Well, lets see, we adopted our child from the state, she cae from a foster home. We had put great thought into fostering, but thought that we weren't strong enough to do it. The thought of an abused child coming into our home for a short time to then be released back to the abusive parents, well, was a hard thing to grasp. I have seen this over and over again, and it's a terriable thing to witness. After we adopted our little girl, we had thought of adopting another, then came to the foster thing again. Well, I still feel that it would be difficult to deal with even more. Having a permanent child in the home, and her seeing children coming into our home in there scared and confused state, and becoming attached to them, then having to let go. I don't know that she would be able to cope. I wish that I could be stronger. I know that there are alot of kids out there that are going into abusive foster homes from there abusive bio home. It saddens me so. So, I guess my answer to your question, is adopt. I would do it all over again. She is such a joy in our lives! I love her so much! I would love to have more, and so would my daughter. She is 7 now and wants a sister or brother. We talk about it often, but have yet to make any arrangements. This might have got the ball rolling again for me. Thanks! Good luck to you! Have a great day! :)

Answer 6

I became a foster mother in 1989. I fostered twin girls, fell in love with them and they became part of our family. I adopted them in 1993. I had 3 sons and wanted more children unfortunately I had to have a hysterectomy at the age of 24. So adopting was the next best thing and at the same time giving a less fortunate child a family.

Answer 7

I would adopt but never foster. I have seen close up (relative is a foster parent) what a mess the system is. In fact, it should be illegal. I reported a foster child who I thought was being mentally abused. The "system" did nothing about it. The girl eventually ran away at the ripe old age of 12. While she was missing, she was taken in by "a nice guy". She has piercings and a tattoo now. When social services finally found her, they did take her out of the home and put her in another.

Not all, but many, foster homes do it for the money and it is just wrong! wrong! wrong!

Instead of taking kids away from bad parents, why don't we guide them into being good parents. Whether it means mandatory rehab or face prison. While they are in rehab/prison, make other family members (grandparents) help with the responsibility!

In the USA, many grandparents do step in and they are paid by the state to do so. Too many ways of abusing the system in order to get financial gain exists.

The system really needs to be updated!
Read Judge Judy's book, her interactions with foster care cases will horrify you. Her view on how it should be updated is great!

Answer 8

I would and I want to but my 12yr old child won't hear a word about it. I've tried to explain that every child deserved a loving, special family like what they have and every child should have a mother or father who love them very much like i love my child, that we may get a boy around about the same age. Being a only child I thought they would jump at the chance as their always moaning that their bored and that they have no-one to play with. I've now put that on hold for the moment and now testing their feelings on me having another child explaining that the baby would stay a baby for long time before he/she will be able to play. I haven't given up on adoption/fostering!

Answer 9

I think about it every once in awhile, but I would want to wait until after my children have grown. Not necessarily the adopting, but the fostering. I don't feel it would be fair to my boys to MAKE them deal with problems that could arise from a child who came from a rough home. But when the boys have grown, I would consider being a foster parent. The reason why I would do it would be 'because I could'.

Answer 10

Possibly.

I have no children myself and due to medical problems and the fact my partner has had a vasectomy from his previous marriage make it pretty unlikely that i will ever be a mother so why not!

It would be great to be able to make a child a good home from whatever reasons the child has to be adopted and give it a good start in life. Although, with saying that, i'm fully aware of the commitment that entails and obviously, i would have to be certain that i would be in that situation to do so, as in stable relationship and proper home.