I've been seeing this guy that I met through a friend, and he seems really nice (plus, he came with good recommendations from my said friend). However, recently he (the guy I'm seeing), told me about his friend (frat boy) who got his car spray-painted by an anonymous person. Then he went on about how it could have been the rival frat, but that he knew a few people who hated the leader of the frat. Then he said "I met these ugly girls who hated the frat leader. But it probably wasn't them, because ugly girls usually don't do anything but... sit around and be ugly, and one of them was really fat"..... I found this sort of immature and mean, so I responded (in a half-joking way), " That's so mean hehe..." and the guy answered back, "well I'm just being honest..."
OK. Everything was going pretty good until he said those mean things about those girls.
Does this make him a bad guy?
2007-10-08 19:13:28 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Since he is young, he is probably just immature and a little shallow, not evil, but I would keep my eyes wide open. If this becomes a pattern, or if he keeps excusing meanness as honesty, he may not be too great.
2007-10-08 19:23:13 · answer #1 · answered by neniaf 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it, but saying that means that he's not a very nice guy. He judged their entire personality on how they looked. That doesn't bode very well for your relationship since now you will always wonder if he's going to dump you the second you look less than perfect or if you put on a few extra pounds.
People can say some pretty stupid stuff, but in the end the person you date should for the most part mirror your own beliefs & convictions. Unless you go around saying stuff like this, I really do not think that you would ever be entirely comfortable with him. Let's be honest- that one statement by him ruined your entire impression of him. Since you are asking if he's a bad guy or not, you're basically asking if it would be wrong of you to dump him just for that or if you should wait for him to do or say other horrid things before you dump him. Besides, what if one of those girls was one of your friends or a family member? He'll be saying those things about them, be sure of it.
You could *try* to change him, but in the end you can't. No girl can ever change a guy. The guy has to want to change, REALLY want to change. I don't see that this guy will change any time soon, so ditch him for a real man.
2007-10-09 02:20:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
doesnt make him a bad person but it doesnt make him a good person ya know? I don't think he is boyfriend material though. Always go with your gut instinct. If he rubs you the wrong way he probably not your type of guy. That is mean. Your right. I'm a big girl but I got big from being on medication i used to weigh 130 until i was put on my meds. but I'm not lazy or ugly I'm still beautiful. and my husband thinks so too.
2007-10-09 02:17:04 · answer #3 · answered by :] 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The comments don't necessarily make him a bad guy.
His attachment to a frat that apparently isn't his and his getting into the drama probably does, though.
He's just ignorant. He'll hopefully grow up some day, soon.
2007-10-09 02:21:30 · answer #4 · answered by help_me_moses 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Not necessarilly, but I'd call him on it before going any further with him. Talk to him about what affended you and see how he reacts. Watch to see if he gets defensive or thinks its a joke. If he really sees people this way. Dump him. You deserve better.
2007-10-09 02:26:59 · answer #5 · answered by Lucy's Mama 1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no he isnt a bad guy, just immature and superficial. doesnt seem like he has very much depth to his character- a feature i find extremely important in someone i'm dating.
find yourself a real man not a jock strap from the "row".
2007-10-09 02:18:27 · answer #6 · answered by orange blossom honey 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Not necessarily, but it's certainly a peek into what the future may hold. I'd be wary. Set ups are rarely a good choice.
2007-10-09 02:16:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
It makes him very immature and silly. If you like him just tell him not to say things like that in your presence. If he doesn't then don't be around him because that would mean he is inconsiderate as well.
2007-10-09 02:21:36 · answer #8 · answered by cinnamon35 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
shallow and not something you usually say to another girl especially your girlfriend :)
for some reason i dont think he was totally serious just he tried to come up with something funny, lol.... which apparently didn't work too well
2007-10-09 02:17:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
No. Everyone has bad things, and they usually dont come out untill we get to know them. Just because he has one thing wrong with him doesnt make him all wrong. Like an apple. just cut it out. Or a car. Just buff out the scratch. You can tell him. I dont like you talking like that aroundme. Or just leave it alone andtry to fix him. If he is as good as you say. I'd keep him.
2007-10-09 02:17:05 · answer #10 · answered by Gille N 2 · 1⤊ 3⤋