I've never had the typical "father" you can go to - the one that gets sensitive and protective with his daughters...don't know if it's a cultural thing but he's been more of an army general than a dad - rather than giving advice he'll lecture for hours, we don't hug or kiss - no affection
He's been unemployed for more than 10 yrs and took care of me and my sibling; "mr. mom" while our mom went to work. He's introverted, possessive, controlling, bossy, drama queen, insecure, and paranoid - he can never deal with stress AT ALL and is never calm...
i'm sick of his drama and i just keep telling myself, when i'm done with school, i'll leave home...i know he's my dad and that's who he is, but i'm just sick of his crap...it sucks i never got to have a real dad...
2007-10-08 17:45:40 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It's hard to believe but someday you will probably accept him as he is, even though he does not fulfill the image in your head of what a dad should be. I always wanted a mom who liked to shop and who I could bake cookies with. My mom was agoraphobic and hated shopping malls. Eventually after I had kids we found our common ground. She had so many good qualities -I didn't even try to get to know her when I was young. I was so caught up in "why can't you be like..." Now I have a 17 year old who is the same way with me. I am not the Martha Stewart type she would like to envision herself being the daughter of. I am thankful to have had time to get to know my mother as an adult, even though it was too short and she died suddenly fairly young. Try to maintain a positive relationship with your parents. It will help you with other relationships throughout your life.
2007-10-08 21:12:35 · answer #1 · answered by oregonmom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as children we all love r parents no matter what. however some of us r better when were apart. sometimes personalities, preferences, and lifestyles clash. just bc they r ur parent(s) that doesn't mean you have to agree with everything they do. Unfortunately, if it isn't harming you, if ur taken care of, u have to suck it up and deal w/ it. i agree w/ juju some parents can b very overbearing. personally, i never had a father, but i had a older brother. he was very controlling and possessive and just like u describe ur father and i hated it. i especially hated how much i hated being home when he was there it was my home to damn it and i should b able to enjoy it and have some freedom in my home. however i beleive that r situations differ a bit hwne my brother was around it was like being in a prison we had to walk on eggshells or u new u were in very deep **** he ruled the house he was bigger and stronger than everyone else. as far as u go tho talk to your mom mayb she can help ease things. good luck. also try getting to no ur father and y he is the way he is. even if u dont agree with it it may help u accept him the way he is and understand him. as humans the greatest gift we have is understanding.
2007-10-09 01:15:01 · answer #2 · answered by Jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has no control over any other aspect of his life, so he tries to control you.
All I can suggest is getting a job, or making your own gig, after school and banking as much as you can so that when you are 18 and graduated, you will have money for a deposit on an apartment. The job also serves to take you away from the house (and him). You can further avoid the drama at home by studying at friends' houses.
You just have to make sure you stay out of trouble by keeping your grades up and doing whatever chores have been assigned to you at home.
2007-10-09 00:54:59 · answer #3 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I hate to tell you, but you are not alone. A lot of dads are not what the fairytale dad seems like. It does sound like he has some issues beyond that so I'm sorry you are dealing with that. My parents never hugged or kissed my sister or myself. It stinks, but I make sure I give my daughters hugs(which means I get them, too) I fought with my dad when I lived with him and became close with him when I didn't. You may be happier once you are not living there.
2007-10-09 01:30:49 · answer #4 · answered by Emily 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL pray for Him....
:( maybe the army thought him wrong?
and if he's a drama king, insecure, paranoide, Help Him.!!!!
if he's possevive, isn't that bad???? don't you have social services????. how does your mum deal with this?
that's good he's controlling, he's your father, but i understand how far he would go.... but we must show them we obey them, later it'll be all good, they'll see how your responicble,
paranoid to me is something else, just ignore it.....
and as for the answer JUJU gave..
not all fathers are like that... and some moms are like the father that Simply irressitable described. not all moms are good.
2007-10-09 00:57:21 · answer #5 · answered by Justin Kalkimer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, Dont worry.
Dont just give any attention towards him
concentrate on studies.
time will teach everybody a good lesson.
2007-10-09 01:04:27 · answer #6 · answered by Loiness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes fathers can be over bearing, thats why we have moms, my husband is like that he never understood children small or big, and it seems he nic-pics over nothing, have your mom talk to him maybe she can make him understand. good luck.
2007-10-09 00:53:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suggest if he is getting in the way of what you want, I would think he needs to get out of the way as long as what you want is reasonable. Ultimately you live for yourself and if he doesn't want you to, then I think he is in the wrong.
2007-10-09 00:54:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋