How do I get him to spifty up and be more meticulous about his hygeine?

Question

He is just plain dirty now. He has body odor and he doesnt care. He wants to make love, but he is not fresh, and its a turn off. I am wondering what I can do or how I can be more tactful telling him to wash it or get away from me. Any suggestions.
He came to my bed in the same shirt he wore to a ball game on Sunday. The temp was 90 degrees outside and I cannot believe he didnt shower or clean up. Then he was all over me trying to have sex. Do some men not realize they stink?
How can I get the point across or are all men this way?

Answer 1

All men are NOT that way. I think it's kind of rude and selfish to not take YOU into consideration here. I am a male and shower before getting into bed with a woman no matter what - sex or no sex. But that's me.

If I were you, I'd let this guy go. Why? Do you want to start convincing him to go bathe, as you would a child? No way, sister. Get out now....you can't change the spots on a leopard.

Answer 2

That is certainly not a trait of all men. I myself am embarrassed when I am approached by my loved one and I know I've been sweating, or not a fresh as I'd like to be. I find myself getting a quick shower before just to correct any possibly issues. Speaking from personal experience I did not do much work around the house or groom myself until I was, confronted by my partner, I was embarrassed and didn't want her to look bad upon me (after all she is my everything). These things were done out of habit and I simply did not notice the negative effect on others.

Not saying this may be the best course of action, but let him know you prefer clean smelling men to have sex with. This hopefully will give him a hint and hopefully helps him decipher the female psyche with another equation "smelling clean = sex". Honestly, guys go waaay out of the way to have sex, this really isn't asking too much.

Methods: Nonchalant when on you and trying to get freaky say ("Hey, how bout after you get out the shower") or ("Why don't you freshen up for me while I get changed into something more comfortable")... he should get the hint. if not just tell him straight out. Being open is the key to a successful relationship.

Answer 3

There are some creative hints you could try, like drawing a bath, and having candles around it, inviting him to join you, or soak by himself while you wash his back...
If, however, you have no success with tactfulness, you need to come right out and let him know that you have boundries. A person should never allow another to disrespect them like that. I had the same problem before.
One way I took care of him not brushing his teeth before he came to bed, was puting a cartoon on the headboard, of two dragons, and the female saying to her spouse, " eww, you have people breath!" my husband laughed, then looked at me, and realized that I had had enough.
have a conversation with him when you are both in good moods, and try and be gentle, athough I know that is takes what it takes sometimes to get them to get it!!!

Answer 4

Personally, it's one of my biggest fears... to smell bad. I am a little too meticulous about it, so it's not all men. With something like this you have to be full on honest. You can't hint or hope he gets it. Try taking a shower with him and make it a game at first... yes we are silly creatures by the way.. and then you can almost demand a shower out of him for sex. Kinda like the Pavlov's dogs theory. Good luck

Answer 5

No, many men know if they want to get laid, they need to at least wash their ***, face, pits and balls, and at least put on a clean t-shirt and undies. Buy him some clean laundry or do his laundry and tell him that he stinks and you set out some clean laundry for him to put on after he takes a shower. Offer him some incentive. He showers he doesn't just get sex, he get a little bit of ******* or something else.

Answer 6

I sleep in the other room. I refuse to get into clean sheets with a man that is dirty. I also will not come back to bed unless he changes the sheets and takes a shower.
As of now I allways get him to take a shower.

Answer 7

the simple and most effective way to tell him that he stinks is just telling him straight out that he stinks and that he needs to shower and its not attractive and that it turns u off... if u keep waiting for the rite time or the rite atsomphere or the rite way, it wont happen cos its plain simple that guys dont get it wen we tell them things simply... so just go up to him and tell him how u feel... if he doesnt like it he will sulk abt it but he will do as u say after a little while..

Answer 8

I conclude that his unavoidable funky stench is a huge deal breaker in the relationship, since you are seeking advice from total strangers on the internet.

Therefore...

If it's that big of a deal, then dump his nasty ***. Some people are just gross.
There are guys out there who take WAY better care of their appearance.

Answer 9

bless your heart....most guys i know shower religiously, i think it depends on how they're raised. is this guy your boyfriend? if he is, then tell him if he doesn't start bathing regularly, then you're leaving. if a guy doesn't respect himself enough to take pride in his appearance, then he isn't going to respect you. much less be a good role model for future children. give him some soap, and a wash cloth, and tell him "bathe regularly or i'm out." it's gross, and he should be ashamed of himself. even the ancient Egyptians took baths, and used scented oils.

Answer 10

Get rid of him. A man who can't take care of himself isn't going to take care of anything. If he doesn't care about himself - how could he possibly care about you? This is something that is out of your reach, darlin. I know you may like him, but you have to look out for yourself. This is the long run lookout. Find a guy who takes care of himself (money, clothes, hygiene) and you'll be better off - i promise ya!