My 17 year old son wants to join the National Guard. He said mainly to pay for college.?

Question

I think he also wants to get away from his father. He has grown to hate him for various reasons. My 25 year old daughter has her own apartment and moved out to get away from him. Everybody fights alot. I lost a son 19 years ago thru miscarriage I can't lose him too. If the war wasn't going on it might not be as bad. I can't live without my son. He's my whole world. What do I do?

Answer 1

Joining the National Guard pretty much guarantees being on the ground, just like the Army or Marines. If he really insists on joining the military, see if he can join the Coast Guard, Navy or Air force instead. I am serious about this.

Military service is not survivable these days. We may have lost "only" 3,000 soldiers in Iraq, but those are just the ones that died there in action, they don't report the 76,000+ that have died after having been horrifically maimed and dying of radiation from the DU tipped shells they are using out there. We have over 500,000 troops that came home from the first Gulf War that have been dying steadily of fighting multilple cancers at the same time because of the DU. When a vet checks in at the VA Hospital, the first thing they do is ask what war they served in, and the Gulf War guys get hauled to a different part of the hospital than anyone else. See if you can get this information across to him. Yes, Bush and his bunch are trying to kill as many young people as they can. The recruiters have a quota to make... any which way they can.

Talk with him and see what else appeals to him. Perhaps there is a program at the local community college that will train him to make a good living in a relatively short amount of time... car repair, plumbing, A/C & heating repair... something he can stay happily busy with.

Your son could probably get a couple of other guys together and rent a 3 bedroom apartment relatively cheaply. He can earn enough money for that while going to community college. That will give him enough distance from all the fighting.

Answer 2

Tell him that there are other ways to pay for college. Student loans and scholarships to name a few. I joined the miltary because I couldn't afford college and didn't have the grades. I knew nothing about student loans or grants oro anything like that. I had a great time in the military but i felt like I wasted that time when I got out and got into the job market and was 4 years behind in pay and benefits with people my age. I would suggest to have him move out maybe with his sister until he can think level headed about his feelings of wanting to get away from your husband. I would then confront your husband and ask him what he is or is not doing to cause hostilities with your children. Just a thought.

Answer 3

Do yourself a favor and do your own homework about the guard. That's what I would do.

Make him finish high school, of course. The thing is, once he reaches a certain age, he can do what he wants to do. Be thankful he's trying to better himself. He wants to go to school and not depend on his parents to do it. Good for him.

If you have made your son your whole life, then you live your life on the edge. No one person should be your whole life, especially when they are on the verge of becoming adults.

Seek good counseling and get yourself strong.

You see that he could go into the war in Iraq, but anything could happen tomorrow. Anything at all.

In the meantime, start doing your homework. And take steps to start letting go now.

Answer 4

Dear Donna,
I think your question is related to your previous query.Your son wants to take the job with National Guard because of your financial problems. it is good for him to pay for his college fees. it will give him a lot of confidence to face the harsh realities in future. Coming to the next part of your question of being unable to live without him as he is your whole world is more important for your wellness. Nobody is for ever, every one has to find his own life. No body can remain tied to one person for life. you have to understand this for your own good. You could not live with your mother. Your husband also could not live with his mother. how can you think your son will be living with you for all time to come. Sooner or later he has to leave you. while appreciating your concern for your son, I feel you should let him go to pursue his own life, otherwise he may also turn like your husband. No body likes to live in an atmosphere where every one fights a lot. Give him his space which I feel he needs to grow in.

Answer 5

You need to talk to him. Ask him why he wants to join the National Guard. To get away from his father or to pay for college? make sure hes doing it for the right reasons!

Answer 6

He's 17 now right? Well, get him put in the mental hospital (you can do this easier since he is a minor) and then when he tries to join the miltary, make his history clear and he won't be able to.

Answer 7

There are a lot of kids doing that these days. I am inclined to agree with them because paying off college for ten years is a bummer. The situation with dad could be corrected if you and your kids all get together and confront him with what bothers you. If he doesn't come around, then you three figure a better way.
Good Luck

Answer 8

why don't you try to help their father? let me guess a step father.which ever i wouldnt put up with him on my kids all the time and for whatever reason he hates him , it must be pretty bad for a child to hate their father, why don't you get rid of him and your and their problem will be solved.

Answer 9

The best advice stop him and try to have 101 talk. He can get money for college in diff ways and not worth to loss his life.

Answer 10

Be proud of the fact that he is taking on responsibilty(college money) and that he wants to serve his country. My boys are only 9 & 12 but i will support them if this is what they choose.