i have no confidence around girls - please help?

Question

i am a 16 yr old guy, 6ft tall, ginger (red) hair. please help me - i have no confidence around girls - i have real trouble knowing what to say around them - i have planty of female friends but none of them would ever see me as anything else.

(i go 2 the gym twice a week and also play golf twice a week so i believe i am quite phsically fit. - 6ft tall 32 inch waist)

please give me some advice on how to approach girls so they receive a good impression of me

Answer 1

its not hard. Just be natural. Talk about anything. If shes a talker im sure she will keep the conversation going and you can just go from there. You dont want to be like the guys who are big talkers and just walk up to a girl trying to impress them. I can always tell those types. I dont think its really 'lines' they are giving but they are just too forward. I guess i like em shy.

Answer 2

Dude, I was the exact same as you in high school. Six foot with a 30 inch waist, fit, and somewhat good looking. I couldn't for the life of me do anything around a girl, let alone one that I liked. I am now 24 and things are much different.

Here the best answer I can give you. Confidence comes from being comfortable with your own self. Confidence comes with time and experience, and you are still pretty young and inexperienced (at life). You have so much more emotional and intellectual growing to do. There is absolutely no secret or magic pill that will give you confidence around girls, it something you have work hard at and earn. And it does not come over night. Confidence around the opposite sex is a very complex dynamic and involves many different facets. However, there are some things you can do to build true inner self confidence.

True self confidence has nothing to do with the opposite sex. It has nothing to do with anyone but YOU. At your age, I would highly consider doing these things. First, study you *** off and get the best grades you possibly can. School is your job, and when you do well at your job it always feel wonderful. Figure out what your goals are and write them down. These are personal goals and should not include "getting a girlfriend". That is not a goal to attained. It is something that simply happens when two people fall for each other. WRITE YOU GOALS DOWN! This is incredibly important! Make your goals challenging but attainable, and do what it takes accomplish each and everyone! And when you do, create new goals!! You will be amazed at what you can do, and you will be amazed the confidence it will bring you. Find a hobby you enjoy and become the best you can be at it. Become an expert at it. Having a niche like that will boost your confidence. EXERCISE! I know you said you are in decent shape, but decent doesn't build the confidence you are seeking. Start lifting weights and eating healthy and exercising regularly, and don't quit. Exercise is one the best things you can do for you body, mind, and soul, and subsequently one of the best things for your self confidence. When you start to see the gains you make in the gym (being able to lift heavier weights, running longer and faster) you will want to exercise more and more, and again your confidence will go up. In fact, it will go through the roof!

As far as what to say do around girls, that one is easy. Be yourself, and always do your best. That goes all those things I listed above and anything you ever do in your life. You will get better and better interacting with girls as time goes on and get more experience and become more comfortable in that situation, but it will take just that, time.

You have so much self confidence if you do those things, and it will be the genuine, real self confidence that very few your age have. You will do wonders for yourself now and in the future, trust me on this. If you do these things and work on building yourself and your confidence like that, by the time you go to college you be in a league of you own. And you know is cool about doing those things for YOU and building your self confidence of the sole purpose of better YOU? You naturally become INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE to females, and the amazing thing is what you are doing has nothing to do with females! It has everything to do with you!!

Take it from me bro, do those things and it will change you life forever for the better. You will meet a wonderful girl eventually, it's not a matter of IF, it's a matter of WHEN. It won't be on your time line, in fact it might not happen for another four or five years, but when it does it will be amazing. I know because when I met my first love, it wasn't until I was 21, and it was worth all the **** I went through with all the past girls I dated just to find the right one. Don't ever settle!

If you want to chat or have any questions send me an email IM.

Answer 3

Hey, maybe ur worrying too much and being nervous around them. U sound a lot like my boyfriend in the way u look (and hes soo cute lol). The advice id give is to be interested in the girls. Show a bit of confidence as well, girls like a confident guy who can look after them. Id also say dont be afraid to flirt a little or u may keep ending up in that 'friend zone'. When asking them questions about themselves show interest and flatter them, occassionally touch their arm or do something subtle but flirty so they know u r into them and not just in a friend way. At the end of the day us girls are just people, dont be scared of us; just show some confidence and try to make them laugh, that never fails! good luck!!!x

Answer 4

Get some. I always liked that in a guy or person really. Just realize that being yourself is the best you can do. You'll find the right person when the time is right anyways. SO in turn who cares about all the wrong ones and wether they like you or not. Keep being a good friend that makes for great relationships in the future. It's also like a watched pot never boils. Good luck, Kim

Answer 5

What's wrong with you?

Ask yourself that question, what is wrong with you that you don't like? There is some reason why you don't feel confident around women, it is because you don't feel confident in some aspect of yourself.

My advice: Try. Try. Try. Keep trying. Many times, you will fail, but think, how many times did you fail on the golf course before you got good? Talking to women is no different. Don't be afraid to strike out with a woman. Your buddies may give you crap (as is their right, they are your friends after all and that's what friends do, they tease each other), but keep trying. Eventually, the lessons you learned from repeated failure will sink in and you'll make different mistakes. Once you correct those, you'll be ready. DON'T BE AFRAID OF FAILURE, BE AFRAID OF INACTION.

Answer 6

If girls are coming up for your number when you haven't said anything you must be pretty cute, and personally I think it is adorably cute that you're too shy to talk (and not a player like so many guys whose good looks are wasted on them). Just try to remember conversations with your friends and talk about the same kind of things so that you will have something to say. Us girls are pretty willing to overlook a little awkwardness for a shy cutie ;)

Answer 7

first, make sure your hair looks nice, neatly trimmed, nails too. second, dress nice, dont wear ratty clothes, shine your shoes. third, approach them in a situation thats low pressure. dont walk over in front of a bunch of her friends, catch her in the hallway between classes, after school, so its one on one. fourth, smile and make eye contact, even if its the hardest thing in the world and you are jello inside. act like you know what you are doing. fifth, break the ice. pick a topic you know she might be interested in, sports shes playing, tv shows, football game that weekend. sixth, short but sweet. you dont need to talk to her for 30 minutes. just enough to let her know that you are interested. if it feels like the conversation gets choppy after a few minutes. excuse yourself, say you will talk to her again soon, and walk away. seventh, walk with confidence, dont look back, and dont celebrate til you know she cant see you. phew, that was a long answer. hope that gets you started and good luck. women are the greatest treasures in the world.

Answer 8

You're just lacking confidence. You need to step up your game in life in general, stop putting so much emphasis on the girls and start putting more emphasis in what you are interested in and want to be good at. find what you want to be good at and then start driving towards some personal goals, push yourself. This will build your confidence in other areas subcontiously and next thing you know, you'll be tappin *** left and right.

Answer 9

Since u have female friends, ask them for help…from a girls point of view would be very helpful especially from those who know u…

Answer 10

hi im 5'6 and im also a ginger lol.. anyways i thought it ws funny because im also 16 and up till a few years ago i too was nervous around women, the thing you have to relize si that women are going to like you for who you are, you cant force some one to like you and u cant build a relationship off of lies, be yourself and ull find the right girl