adoption. l was adopted,how can l search for my real mum?

Question

l was adopted in 1966 how do l go about looking for my biological mum? l have all the paper work but not sure where to start? please help.

Answer 1

Hi Hunnybunny,

Possum has some good links there. I'm sure Gershom can also point you in the right directions. Here's a little more information for you too:

I always recommend for adoptees to sign up with International Soundex Reunion Registry first. Besides being free, it is worldwide & confidential. They will keep your info on file until a match is made or you request them to remove your information. I found 2 family members through them. Here is their link:

http://www.isrr.net/about_isrr.shtml

If you are in USA, this website could be useful for you:
http://www.aborn.faithweb.com/
Click where it says " Before you begin your search." Next, read "Proper way to search, part 1" and then "Proper way to search, part 2." Located on the right column.

Hope some of this information is helpful. You & all adoptees are always in my prayers.

Good Luck,

julie
reunited adoptee

Answer 2

Firstly, where are you? UK? US? Oz? NZ?, etc.
When you say you have all the paper work - does this mean you have your original Birth Certificate?
If so, you have your Mother's name when you were registered and you know the area in which you were born. That may not be her home Town (lots of Mother and Baby Homes around the Country - she might have gone miles to give birth).
You could start looking for a marriage post 1966 which would give you her new surname and an area of the Country.
Once you know her name, you could advertise on Friends Reunited, you could send a letter addressed to "The Readers' Letters Column" of the newspaper local to where she married and ask if anyone has any knowledge of Mrs. Jane Smith, nee Brown (or whatever).
You could try www.192.com to see if Mr. and Mrs. Smith have a listed phone number
You could check out the UK Electoral Roll - quite a few of us have copies "plumbed" into our computers.
Useful sites - Ancestry.com, Genes Reunited, Lost Cousins.
I'm assuming you have checked already to see if she has listed that she willing to be found - your friendly neighbourhood Social Workers will give details.
I suggest that if you find her, you get someone else to contact her first.

Answer 3

Hello, I am a mother who was forced to give up my baby, by my parents. Also in 1966. Back then, eveyone talked about the 'Swinging Sixties' but in truth people were still very repressed and parents of teenagers were very strict. I always regretted not having the strength to defy my parents and keep my baby - a girl.
I have been in touch with NCC Adoption agency but have to wait to be contacted by my child. I take comfort from the fact that she has not contacted me; I hope this means that she has had a happy life. Even so, it would be wonderful if she came into my life.
My advice is to get in touch with the Agency who dealt with your adoption. My best wishes for you in your search.

Answer 4

UK: Once you have some details to go from adoption/birth certificates there is a contact register that has been set up to connect families separated by adoption and who are looking for one another - it is run by the General Register Office: 0151 471 4252. Also contact Norcap - they specialise in all things adoption related: 01865 875000. Once you apply for your original birth certificate you should be appointed a counsellor who can help you to get access to your adoption records which may have some contact details etc.

There are a million different ways to get started - there are books etc, it may be a case of trying various different avenues until you strike lucky. Good Luck - I hope you find what you're looking for.

Answer 5

Where are you??

Please add some more info to your question post so that we can help you out - or at least try to lead you in the right direction!

You can also check out the following sites for information for adoptees about numerous topics -

http://www.adultadoptees.org/
http://soulofadoption.com/
http://www.originsusa.org/

All my best wishes.
I finally searched and found my family of origin 2 years ago - and although some of it has been really hard - I don't regret any of the journey.

Grab all the support you can get - it can be a bit of a roller-coaster ride.

Answer 6

you can start by writing the social security admin. if you know what state you are maybe from? do you know where you were born? if you knew your real name you could write to the state depart(health) and get your real birth certificate cause that is only if you hae your name. i did and it was neat. there are many things on it sometimes they name the parents and where they were born stuff like that. sometimes they have social security numbers and stuff. you can go on cousinconnect.com and that will help to leave message there i met a 1/2 sister by using that. i have two real sisters. its unreal both parents are dead. both were drunks and a mess. my mom died at 61 in banning calif. dad died in 89 from cancer (drinking). very sad life they had.

Answer 7

Not too sure but try the adoption agency. I am sure they will be able to point you in the right direction

Answer 8

i found my dad by putting a pic of me in a magazine...9mths later somebody found the magazine in a dentists,you know all the old magazines!!got a phone call and 45mins later he was at my door.go careful though as people dont realise that not many of the reunions work,me and my dad have a very strained relationship and go for months or years without talking,but im glad i found him cos i know who i am now.good luck.

Answer 9

Go to the adoption agency get a lead there and get a good PI

Answer 10

Mothers who don't want to be found are a very rare breed!

There are others here who have more search experience than I do, but http://www.isrr.net/registration.shtml is a great resource.

I hope you find her, and have a great reunion experience!