How do I get over the death of my dog?

Question

My dog was put to sleep on Friday at the age of 14. He was a lovely dog but had bad arthritis in his hips.
I feel so guilty cos I wasn't there at the end. I stupidly thought I couldn't face it so my boyfriend held his hand for me.

I can't stop crying. I miss him and I'm racked with guilt.

How can I get over this and how long before it gets easier? Does anyone else feel they did the wrong thing in having their pet put to sleep?

I feel like my heart has been ripped from my chest.

Answer 1

Aww hon I am so sorry. But you should know, that you never get over the death of a loved one, what does happene, however, is that it will get easier to deal with and eventually you move on and remember the happy thoughts.

I havent lost a dog, but I did have to put my cat down when she consumed some anti freeze and her kidneys failed. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. I wasnt there when she passed either. She was scheduled to be put down the following morning, but she didnt make it through the night. It was tough, but she is no longer in pain and thats what matters.

You had 14 years with your dog, and Im sure they were lovely years. Hold on to that, and thank God that your friend is no longe in pain.

Take care. (:

Answer 2

I answer many questions here but the first one I asked was about a month ago. I was writing about a strange dream I had where I had seen my dogs who had gone on again. In the process of writing, I suddenly could hear some words to a poem or ode written from a dogs point of view. No one has been able to find the writing but it broke my heart all over again. My dogs were Belgian Sheepdogs and were trained in search and rescue. It has been three years since the last one was put to sleep, but I still am affected by the loss. One reason it hurts is that in the death of a family member or friend
we have to accept their demise as being human. Yet in having an animal friend put to sleep, you have had to decide to end their life. You must first understand it is the ultimate act of love on your part to end the life of a suffering pet. After each one I went through it was very peaceful. What was hard for me to understand is as the vet let me stay with them after their death, they did not look real. I would brush them, hold them, and repeat how much I love them over and over. Just looked like a stuffed toy dog. It's the spark of life that made them real. My heart still hurts like yours but it will get easier.
"Though my paws are still and I can no longer play like we used to, I am somewhere beautiful waiting for you. It's OK to miss me, but always keep a place open in your heart... for another friend will come along that you will learn to love just as much as you loved me". Bless you, G.

Answer 3

It's completely natural to feel guilty after the death of someone close to you. Everyone does, unless they're cold and heartless.

Last October, my dog, who I had had since I was four years old, was put to sleep. She was only two years younger than me; she could have been a sister.

The worst part of it is, I was 2000 miles away from home when it happened. My mom called me on the phone and told me the day after it happened. When she told me, it felt like I'd been hit in the chest with a ton of bricks. She hadn't even told me before they did it so I could say goodbye.

You didn't do the wrong thing. He was suffering, and it was only a matter of time before he died on his own, and he would have died in a lot more pain than he did.

It's hard to let go of guilt. My mother still cries over the cat we had seven years ago that got eaten by a coyote one night because she feels guilty that she threw him outside that night for something stupid. She thinks it's her fault he died. And it's not.

You'll miss your dog for a while. The best way I've found to get over things like that is to preoccupy yourself with something else. Find a new hobby that you enjoy doing that you can lose yourself in. Eventually you'll get too busy to feel sad, and before you know it, your memories of your dog will become fond ones instead of ones that make you cry.

Good luck. I know how hard it is.

Answer 4

I had to have my dog put to sleep in December.He had advanced cancer.They would not let me into the room till after it was done.But I did say my goodbyes to my 'little friend and at times my only one.I DO know how you feel.It has been 10mths
and I still get teary eyed.
Guilt :You did the right thing for him.
You will feel when the time is right to get another dog,but the other dog will not replace the one you lost.Love him or her as
another life.
My heart goes out to you.
What I did was to set up a place in the living room on a book shelf with his collar and leash never to be used again and several pictures of him.I still have 2 rolls of film I cant bring myself to develop....yet.
E-mail me if you [e-mail]

Answer 5

I don't think you should be guilty by putting you dog to sleep. It might sound as if you hindered him from living a few more days or months, but in the end you just stopped his suffering.

Everybody has moments like these in their lives, it's just like losing a best friend... and it's really sad. But for you to feel easier, you must realize that he is in a happier place right now and that he'll always be watching over you and protecting you wherever you go. I know it sounds like a cliche and weird to say for a dog, but it really is true.

Answer 6

No, u did the right thing. The poor dog was suffering too much. arthritis is a painful disease not only for humans but for animals too. People always get really attached with their pets. It' something natural, we are social beings. If u want to get over the pain faster, remember one thing, animals, even if they get to like their human masters, they do not have conscience, and cannot tell the difference between good or evil.

Answer 7

I am sorry to hear about your pet. I have had many dogs in my life, and they were all special, but I knew one day they would have to go to doggier heaven. In fact, I had to put my to sleep for the same reason, but she also had cataracts, and people thought I was selfish for not putting her out of her pain, she hurt, so did I after,and I got 4 of my dogs cremated so they are here and it comforted me, don't feel guilty honey, its alright to mourn your best friend, remember all the good things and good fun you shared,your pet went to sleep knowing that and thanking you for all your love and affection. Have to go. I feel bad now. But one suggestion, don't get another pet right away until you have healed and can love the next one just as much. Take care. My name is Linda if you need to vent ok? my e-mail is [e-mail]

Answer 8

Here's a poem - a sort of prayer - I wrote when I had to have my dog put down. I send it to people sometimes when I hear they've lost a dog. I hope it helps you:

May memory never cease to trace,
The gentle outline of your face.
May hands remember across the years
The feeling of your velvet ears.
In the dark: afraid, alone,
May you be there to guide me home,
And fearing I may come to harm,
Gently nose my empty palm.
May you return to calm my fears,
And gently kiss away my tears,
And when I have grown very old,
Curl close against the bitter cold.
And though this life will be long and sweet
I know that we will never meet.
And so I'll hasten at the end,
To where summer reigns and I may bend
To hold my
smallest
truest friend.

Answer 9

Its never wrong to end an animals suffering you know he's better off,death is always harder for the ones left behind, but would it been fair to let the dog keep suffering ? no course not, we get selfish when it comes to death because we obviously want that creature in are lives no matter what,so Its understandable to feel extremely hurt,and yes it will take time but you have to think of his life in entirety to get over it. You will just keep him in your heart and again remember he's better off not hurting anymore. I wouldn't want to be there at the end either you wouldn't want that to be your last memory of him.

Answer 10

First, don't beat yourself up over it. Some people's sensitivities won't allow them to handle a first hand death experience. It just means that you are sensitive.
Second, I know it sounds corny but the only way to get over it is to find another puppy, NOT to take the place of the one you lost but to give your mind and heart something to think and work with. Good luck and I feel for you.