Assuming the woman is crazy about him and the man says he loves the woman but is just not into commitments, is there any hope for a happy ending or sorts?
2007-10-07 22:11:05 · 19 answers · asked by ••Tara•• 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ok, clarification: it's not about me. i just wanna know your thoughts on this because i always see this scenario and it makes me wonder what future there is for this kind of relationship.
thank you so much!
2007-10-07 22:38:44 · update #1
There is always hope. If you love him, then do not pester him about commitment. Say its all right. Even if you do not mean it. Then go about your business. Do not always be available to him. Go out with your friends. Be happy. It will make him worry that you might just be slipping away. If he truly loves you. He will make the commitment just to keep you from drifting away.
2007-10-07 22:16:25 · answer #1 · answered by nora d 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Depend on how long you two have been going steady in a monogamous relationship for, If you two have been going out for a long time then, yes he has to commit, I mean a relationship can't be one-sided it just doesn't balance out.
Just what does he mean when he says he "can't commit", like only being with you emotionally? sexually? what? If he can't commit, then maybe just not let yourself get too attached and just have some fun with this man and make sure you have protected sex if he's not willing to be sexually monogamous with you. Cause in the end if he doesn't want to commit, you'll end up heartbroken and alone. You have to think of #1 all times, in a relationship or not.
If you don't want to use up that kind of energy pursuing this farther, then just cut the strings.
Oh, and PS - Your probably not crazy, but his actions and his attitude towards you, your feelings and your dialog is probably driving you crazy with assumptions and thoughts, which brings on insecure thoughts which makes you to do and say and think un-trusting and needy. It's hard to maintain trust when you simply can't.
Think about what you want and how you deserve to be treated. You deserve someone that is willing to commit and decide if he's worth the trouble cause their are many fish in the sea... as my aunt would say..:)
Hope all goes well....Take care
2007-10-07 22:52:25 · answer #2 · answered by It's just me... 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is difficult to know. we all are non committal in the beginning of a relationship. this you will find out after some time and i mean after 1 to 2 years with him. while the time is passing and there is not any discussion for a commitment then it is time to leave this relationship back and to move on. you need some time to know better the other person, because it is possible that he is good enough and wants to committee with you but something is bothering you and you will be the one that won't to continue. so give some space and the time will show if it is right or not to stay. if he is from the begging negative to commitments then you should ask yourself if you want to be in or out.!
2007-10-07 22:25:59 · answer #3 · answered by ALEXANDRA-MARIA S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you thinking that the happy ending would be that he finally commits to you and only you?? That someday the 2 of you will ride off into the sunset married? If that is the happy ending that you are looking for then you are going to be sorely disappointed. He has already said that he will not commit. That means that you will always love him and he will always love her...and her...and her....and even her. If you can live with that then stay. If you can not live with that then go now before you invest any more time in someone that doesn't know what real love is. You deserve to be first in a relationship. Not stacked in line with others trying to be first too.
2007-10-07 22:16:56 · answer #4 · answered by firemouse23 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No there is no hope. The woman needs to move on and find someone who will love her enough to commit to her. Staying with a man lwho wants to mess around only leads to more heartbreak. Hopefully you're not sleeping with him, because as mom always said, "Why buy the cow if you already get the milk for free?" (means he's just using you)
2007-10-07 22:15:51 · answer #5 · answered by Wintergirl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't see why not...unless she's got a better offer on the table and is really interested in leaving the love and comfort she's established with him behind, what possible reason could she have for not sticking around? The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence...you'll waste just as much time trying to find the same level of happiness and developing the relationship all over again as you would waiting for things to go your way in this one!
2007-10-07 22:17:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The woman needs to make a decision on what is more important to her: being with this particular person or being in a committed relationship on both sides of the relationship.
If the woman thinks she's going to change the man, she's severely wrong. We can't change others, only ourselves.
2007-10-07 22:14:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not on your life. If he loved you enough, he would want to be committed to you. That is just an excuse. I can't believe that women out there fall for it. He does not love you as you love him, I promise!!
I have seen it happen so many times, that when the woman finally leaves, or he decides that it is over, he ends up getting married almost immediately afterwards to someone else. Don't wait your young years waiting for him to change his mind. You can't get those years back!!!
2007-10-07 22:17:53 · answer #8 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
are his reasons for not committing valid in the first place? if it's just a flimsy reason that he wants to date other people, you are better of without him. But if they're good reasons like financial instability and other sorts, then try to find happiness in the present situation. Forcing the person to commit, no matter how much you love him/her, might break your heart much more in the end.
2007-10-07 22:25:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anna 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends on the age of both, it depends on how long they have been together. But if a man says he is not into commitments and the woman is still carrying hope I would tell her tomove on. It happened to my daughter and he wanted to live together but never believed in marriage and sure enough he didnt ask her seven years later. She has since moved on.
2007-10-07 22:14:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋