How would you feel?
For instance, if you hold the doors open for someone, does someone a nice favor, but that person doesn't even thank you for it, how does that make you feel?
I get really pissed off, and would never ever do another favor for that person.
Am I just overreacting? Hopefully I'm not.
2007-10-07 08:30:36 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
When I do something for people, I never expect anything in return, because if I do I'm only setting myself up, for my feelings to be hurt....How ever a nice "thank you", is appreciated. Though, not always gotten...That's Life!
2007-10-07 09:10:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're not overreacting at all. Your reaction, in the absense of their gratitude could be a "your welcome". It's amaxing how quickly and sheepishly they respond with a "thank you". Just make sure your timing is right and they have an appropriate amount of time to respond. There are some situations when this isn't advisable though. There are some people in this world who would hand you your head for less so be selective. I, like you, won't say good morning or hi to someone if they haven't returned it in the past. I only give them one or two chances on separate occasions before I just don't recognize them at all. They're ussually snobs and they don't deserve my attention anyway. Don't dwell on them. There are a lot more people with manners than not so keep being kind and courteous. Please.
2007-10-07 16:13:09 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you hold the door open because you want them to think you are a nice person, or because you enjoy helping others?
Ideally, a good turn is done out of selflessness and it shouldn't matter whether your help is appreciated or not.
It is nice if you get acknowledged, and mutual pleasantries oil the wheels of society, but you don't know the reason for the other person's lack of response, so getting pissed off is really not a good reaction.
Why should you make yourself feel bad by doing someone a favour? Why carry round the aggravation of a mental tally of who does and who doesn't 'deserve' your help? Just do the favour and give yourself extra brownie points for forgiving their thoughtlessness if they don't respond.
2007-10-07 16:12:45 · answer #3 · answered by Borogrove 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did THEY ask you to open the door for them?
So the reason you did it is?
Getting really pissed off for a simple act such as that is over-reacting.
Sometimes you get thanked, sometimes not, maybe a 1000 dollars will come your way for doing that.
Maybe in the future you will need a hand and they will be the ones to help you (far more than holding a door open). These little things are remembered.
Helpfulness is remembered but so is thoughlessness(even moreso). They may be the ones you come to for a reference on your resume or they may know the employer you will work for in the future.
2007-10-07 15:50:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I get a bit miffed, then, I try to "let it go."
I think in most cases, it's unintentional. The person for which I do the courteous gesture just doesn't think to say 'thank you.'
I feel that this person (or these people) take advantage of my good nature.
Dear Abby says something like "don't give people permission to walk all over you." So, the next time, I don't do the nice gesture.
Try not to take it too personally. There are people who genuinely recognize and appreciate random acts of kindness. Keep doing it. Don't do it just for the thanks! Do it because you want to do it and it makes you feel good about yourself.
2007-10-07 16:34:30 · answer #5 · answered by Lizzie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are overreacting a little. True generosity doesn't require a response -- you help someone without any regard for whether or not you'll be recognized or compensated. Of course it's good for the person to respond to you -- that's the right thing to do -- but your actions should not be based on that expectation. If they are, your motives are a little selfish.
2007-10-07 15:40:27 · answer #6 · answered by Mike G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not overreacting! The person should defientley thank you because you are doing something FOR THEM! It's just rude for people not to thank you for it and I completley agree with you. It makes me feel annoyed and mad and makes me think that next time I should never do something like that 4 them again, as everyone says: whatever goes around comes back around, so dont worry;]
2007-10-07 15:35:57 · answer #7 · answered by HottxBabybeex 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgive them. I forgot to thank someone too for helping me. I really hope they will not get upset, bitter and stop being helpful because I really appreciated what they did for me but just wasn't in the right frame of mind to thank them.......in fact I was embarrassed by my own ignorance, so I left as fast as possible. To all those who helped me before, please accept my apology, I do deeply thank you from the bottom of my heart.
2007-10-08 09:18:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get pissed off and try to remind myself not to do something nice for them next time.
2007-10-07 15:56:56 · answer #9 · answered by buttercup 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg that is so annoying my step mom does that all the time and i hate it i 1ce slammed the door in her face on purpose cuz she dint say thanks its just common sence to say thanks especially if u do it for some1 u dont even no u take the time 2 b nice then u get nothing for it
2007-10-07 15:48:30 · answer #10 · answered by antspetrino 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋