How is the best way for a senior citizen to make new friends?

Question

I don't like noisy crowded places, pubs or clubs, and don't smoke.

My interests seem to be either solo and home based, or don't involve crowds, eg the countryside.

I lack confidence, and rediculously shy, except with animals and birds, and been stuck in a rut over the last few years.

Any helpful suggestions please?

I know this may be bending the YA rules a little but thanks everyone for your ideas. The solution to a problem is so often simple, but we can't see it when we're caught in an ever decreasing downward spiral.

I would like to add that I'm not bored, just feeling a bit isolated.

Answer 1

Be as nice as you can in any public place. Let anyone who sees you to think how nice and elegant u can be. People like polite people. Show your talents only when necesary, don't show off, be humorously, as often as you can. Someone will see you eventually

Answer 2

You can't make friends cloistered inside your home.

My wife goes to a nearby Senior Center and involves herself in a knitting and crocheting group. The women there are knitting and crocheting caps and blankets for newborns and helmet liners for our soldiers in Iraq. If that type of thing is of interest to you, you can meet like minded women at a place like that. They even furnish the women with yarn that has been donated to the center.

It has come to my attention that they also have an art class at this Senior Center and a dozen or so people come for that class. Most activities there are free, you may have to furnish materials.

Then there is Sunday School. We have a lot of very friendly men and women in our Sunday School class. We have each others phone numbers and email addresses, and we interact just like any other family member.

Some city newspapers publish a Guide that tells you where and when certain activities are scheduled to happen. Guided tours on nature trails comes to mind, Art Galleries is another.

If you are too shy you may not find anyone you want to strike up a friendship with at those kinds of events, but the point is you have to get out where there are people.

grace2u

Answer 3

If you stay in that rut much longer you will never get out of it.
Get your self along to the local Country & Western shindig usually on a Saturday night (but could be any night). Tell the people at the door that this your first time and they will put you with people you can get to know.
Although you may not yet be able to do the dance steps most have a teaching night where you can learn.
Come on, climb out of that rut, get out and meet people again
stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Answer 4

There are many opportunities for people who enjoy being out in the countryside, being around animals, and being around birds. Take a class, join a club or association related to animals or birds, take a trip sponsored by a group related to animals or birds, volunteer to work with one of these groups.

You could invite a family member, friend or neighbor to attend a lecture or event with you...if you don't want to go it alone at first.

When you do things that you are interested in you may feel less shy...especially if you spend time with people who share your interests.

Answer 5

Volunteering is a great way to meet people, specially if you are shy. Since you are doing a job together, there is plenty to do and you can start to talk to others while you work. Its not just standing around and talking, which I know is really intimidating when you are shy.Contact your local animal refuge - they are often short of volunteers. Or contact your local volunteering agency - it will be in your phone book. They find out what you like doing, and find you a job that will use your interests and skills. Good luck !

Answer 6

Hello

I notice you like nature and the countryside, thats great.

Why dont you contact the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds, The Wild Life Trust or the RSPCA.

They will all be able to point you towards local centres where people like you who love nature can meet and help and its a great way to meet new people as well as doing something you enjoy.

Simon

Answer 7

I was like you until 2 months ago.I walked into my local branch of "age concern" and was kidnapped as a volunteer! I have not looked back,it is wonderful,I have made new friends,feel useful and am my "old self" again after an abscence of 14 months.We have such a laugh but the serious bussiness of helping people is what gives me the biggest buzz.Good luck,try it,you will realise how lucky you are compared with others.xxxxx

Answer 8

Hey Rustie B, you sound just like us! We don't do pubs n clubs, don't drink but we do smoke, but we don't like crowded places as we're not steady on our pins and need elbow crutches to get about (other people tend to trip over them!) We've met some lovely people in Yahoo 360 and you might even meet someone in your area to meet in person. You could improve your confidence by chatting and sharing your interests....it can be a bit of a slog setting it up but just take your time n you'll sort it out no probs. Look forward to seeing you over there! xxx

Answer 9

Continue to use this site - when you get to know the folk - you will truly begin to feel as though you are part of a huge party!

It will in time give you enough confidence to be able to go out and actually SPEAK to real life human beings!

There is no shame in not being a great big party person - there is no-one more country-fied than me - and I don't do small talk well - but on here you can say (almost!) anything and folk will either tell you that you are nuts or join in with the game!

Every person on here has a story - and we have all at some time been where you are - start sharing with people who care and I promise you - it may be a different sort of friendship - but it will be sincere!

Welcome to the party - enjoy!

Answer 10

Why don't you volunteer for some kind of work at the humane society in your area, you say you like animals and birds. It is hard to get out and do things, but in order to overcome boredom and thinking you are all alone, you will have to take the first steps into making friends. I know it sounds impossible, but you may have to do things you do not really like to do to find friends. You need friends and relationships, do not wait until you are too old to get out at all and find out you are still sitting alone. Good luck.

Answer 11

Bingo Hall - everytime. I know that's breaking the mould you have set but it's probably needed.

I'm not being ageist here, my brother has been playing since his early 30's.

Countryside ideas, helping out at your local Charity Dogs home. You will find a lot of people go there looking for companionship so you can find things out from a safe position.