My firm belief is that you should never host a party unless you are willing and able to cover all costs associated.
1. I went to a party where on the letter it stated that dinner would cost $20. It was quite awkward at the end when the hostess asked everyone for money (and she could have easily paid for it herself).
2. Another party I've been to recently the hostess paid for everything but guests felt that they were expected to chip in (and it became another awkward situation).
I ended up covering some of my dessert and my drinks which I find fair as I was invited to the party.
3. At a house party (a birthday again) everyone was asked for money at the door. There were not many costs for the party but the host's justification was that not many would bring presents so is that an ok arrangement?
A solution to this last situation I think is leaving a tin at the front and letting everyone donate how much that they feel they are happy to give-a proven honesty system.
2007-10-06 19:24:58 · 8 answers · asked by blommysnr15 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
the host assumes all costs related to the event; if s/he is doing a party where friends or relatives are attending s/he can ask them to bring food/drinks/ect but aside from that
2007-10-06 19:36:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Usually the host assumes the cost, but if they are upfront about not being willing or able to do so and you go anyway then you are obligated to pitch in the requested amount.
Usually guests help offset the costs of a party by "bringing something" like drinks or a dessert or whatever the host requests. It is considered polite to offer such a gift when accepting any invitation.
2007-10-08 14:30:26 · answer #2 · answered by Jeanne- LEAVES Military Ministry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless the situation is up-front and people are allowed to choose in advance whether it's a situation where they feel comfortable with paying their way for a party, then people invited to a party should not be expected in any way to pay. But additionally, guests should be aware and not expect the host/hostess to pay for "drunken binges" just because someone else is footing the bill. A little courtesy and common sense goes a long way.
2007-10-08 11:02:54 · answer #3 · answered by JenV 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The host should pay for the food, decorations entertainment. You can have the party BYOB and just offer a small array of mixers(sodas, tea, water etc..). The invitation should state if it is BYOB beforehand or a potluck or a bring your own meat kind of BBQ. But it should definitely be stated ahead of time. If it is a party that has a bar that you have to pay for alcohol that is ok, but again needs to be stated. If you go to a party that has a plate price that should be paid ahead of time to alleviate the awkwardness. If it is put on at a restaurant it needs to be made known that this is a gathering of people and that the group is responsible for their own tab. And number 3, What? It sounds like a kegger and what kind of host asks for money for presents? lame. It sounds like you have some cheap acquaintances.
2007-10-06 20:01:50 · answer #4 · answered by TBECK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are hosting a party, you are obliged to pay the entire cost for each person you invite. If the expense of a party at a restaurant is more than you want to pay, have a simple party at home. One wonders if a party at a restaurant of this type would be appropriate for a one year old. He is too young to play the games. Perhaps cake at home would be a better idea this year, and do this when he is older and can participate.
2016-05-17 23:20:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When invited to a dinner part out out I always assume that we are expected to pay for ourselves.. It might be that the hostess was not clear in how she worded her invite.. I always ask how much should I bring that give my host the chance to offer up and pay or to tell me how much to bring. As far as #3 I would assume that a birthday party was not a pay at the door kinda thing and I would be a little offended.
2007-10-07 03:21:17 · answer #6 · answered by YoooHoooo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were informed ahead of time that you would be paying for your own dinner, than it is fine for the hostess to ask for this. Your 3rd example though would make me very offended...asking for money because you weren't giving a gift! You aren't required to give someone a gift, and I would have left when asked for money.
2007-10-07 16:47:16 · answer #7 · answered by missbeans 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are going to ask for donations they should be upfront about it. It should be specified in the invitation.
If they spring it on you last minute, I would have a hard time donating anything or very little at the most.
2007-10-06 19:54:52 · answer #8 · answered by Louie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋