how do you handle people that say your trying to be someone that your not, your acting a role, when iam just?

Question

being myself?
these people really annoy me, because they say i dont face the reality or the truth......when it is their truth, and their reality.....not mine.....i dont like these imposing people how do i deal with them without feeling angry?

Answer 1

You feel the need to defend yourself so angry feelings arise.

Often the best answer, particularly when being affronted, is a question. If you feel the need to answer at all, maybe ask why the questioner feels that way. You might also ask if it's possible they feel they may be projecting their own feelings of inadequacy on you. I believe this is highly probable.

Maybe you've heard of shadow self. This theory is what we dislike in others is something we do that ourselves that we are quite unaware of. Perhaps play actors are confronting you.

It sounds like a comment one young person would make to another. And it sounds like JEALOUSY to me.

You could try, laughingly, 'you are joking, right?' Or ask sincerley, 'If I were, would it matter you you and if so why would it?'

Or just say you are trying your best to be who you are. It's not your intent at all to be phoney. Maybe ask how the person sees you really if she -- this has GOT to be a girl -- thinks you are different tham what you seem.

Some say the way to deal with criticism is just agree with the critic loudly and clearly as it will shut them up faster.

My mom had a charitable saying, 'People do the best they can with what they've got.' Some people aren't to adept at communicating in a constructive manner.

No one likes to be criticized or insulted, particularly if one feels a need to fit in, but don't let them get you down. YOU know who you are and what you are doing. Some are just bent on putting others down, most likely due to their own insecurities.

You could say what you've told us that we each have our own realities and you'd no more expect them to fit into yours than you ought to be expected to fit into theirs.

And you could try to focus on something you like about that person rather than their confrontations. This can be challenging sometimes, you may have to think very hard, but rewarding also. I think you are dealing with persons of very low self esteem for them to be taking such cheap shots.

Answer 2

You are getting some good answers here. Be yourself. Consult your inner wisdom.

On the other hand, it is valuable to listen to what others say, and to at least consider what they have to say. Why not sit down with yourself and think about what they have said, very quietly and rationally, ESPECIALLY if these are people who love you, like family members? Usually, unless someone cares, they wouldn't even bother to say anything. If they have taken the effort, there is often a reason. So that's worth thinking about.

If you're young and trying to establish your own way in the world, or make your own image, you have to distance yourself from others to do that. It's hard for parents to tolerate at the time, but it's a necessary step -- just a natural and normal part of growing up. Just don't hurt yourself for the long term. (For example, don't pierce or tattoo yourself in a place that will prevent you from getting a job ten years later when you have calmed down. Make all those places concealable.)

On the other hand, if the people criticizing you are Skid Row drug addicts on the street, ignore them.

Answer 3

Hey friend. Sorry to hear that you're still having to deal with such jerks. Their reality and their truths are of the blind. They follow blindly what the media tells them is reality and truth, beauty and ugly, evil and good. Don't get angry with them because they are blind to anything other then they believe. Just know that you are smarter then them and that their stupidity will be their downfall and not yours. People who do not understand turn to hatred. They will not see who you are to what they think you are because they are blind. When you think about how stupid they truely are feel happy because they are making you look that much smarter. Hope this helps. Hope to hear from you soon my dear friend.

Answer 4

You need to ignore them and be the best banana you can be in a world of sour grapes ;p

OK bad fruit jokes aside, you need to be you while realising that you unfortunately have to exist in their reality at the same time. Sucks, but we can't have the world the way want it entirely and we can't change other people's points of view. So let them have their opinion and live their own lives and just remember that no one has better insight into who you are and what you are going through than you when they say you have no idea...

Answer 5

OMG I HATE THESE PEOPLE!!!! i almost dropped out of my school last year because of bitchy people like this. Although its worse because im dealing with high school girls. you just have to learn that they are insecure and are jelous of you for some reason. I know its easier said then done but if you tell yourself everyday that thats the reason you start to believe it. Also its okay to get angry. If these people make you angry then embrace it. Get angry. But make sure its not at them. Make sure you get angry at home away from catty people. I say get a punching bag it helps to take out anger. Also i run when i get mad.

I hope this helps. People are just mean and you learn to deal with it one way or another.

Answer 6

'the worlds a stage and we are all actors'
Few of us act the same when we are amongst others; and those who aren't can be reasonably judged as crude and harsh and cruel by insisting on the truth no matter how hurtful.
We tend to be on our best behavior while in the company of police officers, and people who we respect, preachers, doctors, etc., and we have a different posture for family and close friends and I think that's natural.
We try to look appealing to people of the opposite sex if we want to, and it goes on from there.
sooooo, just be yourself in whatever posture you like, as long as it's socially acceptable and that's the best you can do.
Thanks

Answer 7

properly you're actually not hideous. you have zits on the 2nd of course in spite of the undeniable fact that it somewhat is rather user-friendly and so short-term that maximum females actual ignore it. that's advisable to work out a dermatologist besides although because of the fact they may well be waiting to help clean it up swifter (it somewhat is from hormones although). i think of your undertaking is....your pink hair. For some reason females merely often are not into pink hair. i might dye it dark brown.

Answer 8

I think you should find new people to hang out with. There are actually lots of nice people in the world who are non-judgmental and caring. Don't waste your time with a bunch of creeps.

Answer 9

Your best bet is to avoid people like that. In order for them to be able to say such things, they must be responding to something you are doing or saying, right? People like that are energy vampires....avoidance is your best defense.

Answer 10

Tell them you are who you are and if they can't or won't accept you as is then tell them to get lost.