I have been married 8 years been with him 15 years we have 2 children together. I have had enough and want out he just doesn't seem to understand and thinks that if he apologises again or gives me enough time all will be good. I am sick of his laziness, the way he talks to me, and that his mood is always down. I want to be happy in life and be around happy people. I am also finding it harder to not think about other people and what a relationship with them would be like. How do I get him to understand? We have tried counselling but that ended up very one sided
2007-10-05 20:10:15 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We live in my mothers house and everytime I bring it up he tells me to leave, because he knows it is her house and she won't kick him out because she says that it is none of her business and he won't go if I ask him to
2007-10-05 20:24:56 · update #1
Already seen a lawyer in Australia you have to be separated for 1 year before you can divorce
2007-10-05 20:35:01 · update #2
It sounds as though you outgrew him, and unfortunately he isn't going to understand until he grows up. But you have to do what is best for you, and it is not your responsibility to help him to understand.
2007-10-05 20:15:31 · answer #1 · answered by Princess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you can go and leave him there. If you feel that deperate to get out, you may have to be the one to go, as awkward as that may be.
You have a right to be happy and if you are certain you have done everything you possibly can to make the marriage work, then you are justified to leave.
Children adjust to change very quickly and it is important to remember they need to feel emotionally secure and happy too.
Perhaps you can plan this over a period of time so you have the bond money, etc to be able to move. You may not have in the way of personal possessions but your happiness would fill a lot of empty space. And the planning will give you a goal and a focus until you are able to leave.
2007-10-06 07:19:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mom's in a nice spot. "Just leave me out of it."
Ok, so she's not going to make Lazy A$$ leave.
You go. Find a cozy spot, leave the kids with their father and grandmother, they're all good, and take them on the weekends.
Cut yourself the break. He's counting on you taking the kids. So is Mom.
So, let her deal with him dumping on Her.
Maybe he'd grow up. Maybe Mom would gain a little empathy and stand up for her daughter.
I know it's hard to leave the kids. Just make sure they understand that you will call and see them all the time still. Then just do it.
I think, my dear, that he would not be living there long if Mama had to deal with it. No, not long at all.
So, help yourself. Take the card and play it. Find a nice spot. See how long they last. Really, dear, my money's on about two weeks.
2007-10-06 07:38:43 · answer #3 · answered by Puresnow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he will get the picture if you leave him.. once gone then you can see how it goes and if he does some of the changes and sticks to it for more then a few days or weeks. then if your still available and you want too try to work it out with him then go for it.. but if your heart is not into it then it will only be one sided and that wont make anyone happy in the end.. good luck
2007-10-06 03:16:04 · answer #4 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"They say".... by the time you go to counseling it is pretty much done with. Counsel ling is good if you want to save a marriage, but if you want it to be over and done with just file for divorce, and percent him with the papers, you can't be any more forward than that. If he still refuses to go, or wants you to stay, ask him to go to counseling after he sign's the divorce papers. Most times we just want the person we are married too, to change. But it is hard to over look him being so unhappy, and being disrespectful to you. He should seek counseling anyways. What he didn't like his mom aether?
2007-10-06 03:29:47 · answer #5 · answered by Living Life 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are looking for him to say that it is okay for you to leave, he will never tell you that. He sounds clinically depressed, and in fact, if you leave him, he will probably get worse, and may even feel like he no longer has a reason to live. Has he ever been tried on anti-depressant medication? If he is clinically depressed, he won't be able to benefit from counseling unless he gets started on some medication first.
2007-10-06 03:16:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Then hire a lawyer and start the process. Just shield the children as much as possible. Always think of the children and there needs first.
Good luck. I will pray for you and your family.
2007-10-06 03:32:30 · answer #7 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was happy to get that divorce and I thought that I had a new beginning and he was all I ever thought about other than the children.
2007-10-06 03:39:52 · answer #8 · answered by Stephanie S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go get ur own place.. file for the divorce.. and show him u mean it...by action... and not just words..
don't wait on him.. or it will never happen..
move on while u can...
he will move out of ur moms when he sees u with a date..
go for it....
u deserve to be happy ...life is tooo short..
2007-10-06 03:31:43 · answer #9 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack up and leave?
I think he'll get the point then. Have you filed for divorce? Another big clue.
Geez, you could try whacking him over the head with a wiffleball bat.
I dunno, is he a dunce?
2007-10-06 03:16:58 · answer #10 · answered by 2012, Change it back!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋