I just don't care anymore. Not about my wife. She cheated on me with my worst, most hated enemy. Well, not my enemy, but just someone I found most repulsive. More-so than any other person I've ever met, except myself.
The point is, my wife cheated on me with me. And since I don't like myself at all, it made me sick when she had sex with someone who reminds me of myself. It makes me sick, and it was 10 years ago. Of course I didn't know about it for about five years or I would have never come home....we were apart at the time because I left her. It was my fault in a manner of speaking.
I think the basic question I seek the answer to is "How do I care about myself?" I have come to the realization that if you cannot love yourself you cannot truly love anyone else. And that is a real problem for me, because there are people in my life (kids) that deserve better than I am giving them.
And no, I am not bad to them, but I could be a heck of a lot better if I didn't hate myself so.
2007-10-05 20:09:51 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
PS. I was praying for guidance while my wife was doing her thing with the other guy. I was trying with everything in me to do something for myself to make ME better. I was begging her for her love and she was with another and left me to die. I hold great resentment towards her and do not trust her and have lost all of my faith. Basically, I feel totally screwed.
2007-10-05 20:12:41 · update #1
PPS. No, I am not going to any therapist. I've tried them a hundred times and I can shoot holes in almost anything anyone says. I'm hoping someone will finally say something that makes sense to me.
2007-10-05 20:13:43 · update #2
PPPS. Thanks for all the answers. I hate you too. LMAO
2007-10-05 20:24:57 · update #3
PPPS. Thanks for the answers.
2007-10-05 20:53:22 · update #4
When I want to stop hating someone, I try to find one or two things about them that I like, no matter how very, very small. They may simply make a good cup of coffee. I compliment them and focus on that for a week or so, and then I find one more thing and I focus on that for a week or so. As I find each thing and it becomes fact rather than a focus, I add another thing. Bit by bit I can actually start to like someone again. I have done this both with myself and with other people.
I had to do this for me, because I went through a time of seriously hating myself (for good reason). I eventually learned to accept myself again and know that although my behaviour was bad, I am truly not a bad person.
I must comment on the other responses: if this had been written by a woman, I think there would have been a lot more sympathy and helpful advice flying around.
2007-10-06 00:29:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
"I think the basic question I seek the answer to is "How do I care about myself?" I have come to the realization that if you cannot love yourself you cannot truly love anyone else!"
That says it sweety!
You have to begin one tiny step at a time!
Your wife still has control of you! Let it go! You are a worthwhile human being! YES! you are!
I have been to the same pits of hell that you are currently in!
You can get out but you have to learn to love YOU! Good luck!!!
2007-10-06 05:37:00 · answer #2 · answered by Me 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you don't hate yourself. Its my position that people who hate themselves do away with themselves. You should'nt get down on yourself for what they did. They will get their just due in due time. As far as your children, that should be your motivation from here on. Love them and live for them.
2007-10-05 20:31:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anson1 B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over yourself. I know you think your pain and suffering is unique, but it is not. Other people suffer too.
Also, talk to your doctor about medication.
Good luck. I will pray for you and your family.
2007-10-05 20:38:30 · answer #4 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's sad, is she happy with him. An how are the children?
2007-10-05 20:28:45 · answer #5 · answered by Stephanie S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋