Who on this earth can understand these Americans?

Question

The lovely and lithe Ms. Barbara came to me today asking me had she done right.

We have her on the front desk as she is no hard on the eye.
She tells that a B. Clinton called up for a reservation ordering a selection of the finest Scottish cigars to be installed in our Presidential Suite.

When the ever accommodating Ms. Barbara told Mr. Clinton that the hotel was non-smoking - Mr. Clinton said that he had no intention of smoking!

Well - what in all the blue bells in Scotland did he want with all the panatellas?

We are trying very hard to understand all the cultural differences but - by ma grannies bonnet - there are a fair few we are finding out about day by day!

We are beginning to worry about Ms.SLK in the cupboard with McTeal - one of them should have been out by now. Bets are being taken that it will be Ms. SLK and we are anticipating McTeal having to have the weekend off.

Ms. Barbara was alarmed when she was asked if she took American Express. She's resting!

BUTTONS: any culture or race that can find some of their own traits amusing are both civilized and entertaining - and from just the short time that folk have been contributing to Tales from Hotel McTealc - nobody could doubt that Americans/Australians/Canandians/Brits/Irish all have a WICKED sense of the absurd! If only everybody could laugh at themselves sometimes - maybe the world would be a calmer place.
And I for one - I know that I am not alone - would not have a bad word spoken about your countryfolk. Stand up and be proud my dear - your country is still great. Its the people that make the country - not the politicians.
Izzy

Answer 1

The shock was devasting but I have recovered...a wee dram does wonders for the nerves. I never did like anything "express",I like to take my time. We'll just have to adapt to the wonders of the modern world....Scottish cigars...who would have thought.

Answer 2

I was born and raised here and I am trying to still figure them out. We have so many cultures and different kinds of ways that even people who were born here, some of them I can't understand them or what they are saying. I think the hardest one for any one to understand is from Louisiana and that is Cajun.
Now for Bill Clinton I so don't trust him anymore than I do Bush. So, I would keep a close eye out with those two as Bill got busted with Monica, but what does he think that his wife would say if he was caught with Bush, the fake President and Georgie does smoke cigars. I think I would call Bill and tell him that there was a mistake and the person who had booked him a room did not see that all the rooms were filled up for the time he wanted. And, if Mcteal is messing with Ms. SLK it might not matter as they can book Bill's room and have a great time for themselves and you would be out nothing and I would still get the cigars for Mcteal and he can pay for them and then do with them as he wishes.

Answer 3

certainly, this is humorous you ask. i'm incredibly fortunate to stay the place I do. I stay close to the Cascade Mountains. a number of those mountains are countless miles tall. meaning whilst the climate is obvious they may well be seen from dozens of miles away. On an exceptionally solid day, a pair of them can actually be seen from over a hundred miles away. If the Earth have been incredibly around, shouldn't even the tallest mountain be under the horizon at that distance. on the different hand, if the Earth have been incredibly flat, shouldn't YOU be waiting to work out the comparable mountains from everywhere you reside (very small, like with a telescope). Like somebody else stated, the Earth is around however this is huge sufficient that it form of feels flat over short distances. how are you able to appreciate for optimistic? nicely, you should bypass up into area to certainly see for your self that the Earth is around. approximately all you're able to do right here in the worldwide is to maintain traveling in a quickly line and attempt to locate the place the fringe of the flat Earth drops off.

Answer 4

With people from all over the world having heard the fuss over your fine establishment, cultural difference are bound to be part of the package. You may want to purchase a 'USA to Scottish' lingo guide, to help you along. Although, I must admit a smile crosses my face, as you now know the time we had, when it was the other way around. lol

I'm still trying to find your fair Scottish land. Keep the posts coming and the help in line, so our B & B will become a big success.

Answer 5

I personally have met with Mr. Clinton when he was in South Florida after Hurricane Andrew. I spent about 30 minutes with him, and i can assure you, that I had NO STAINS on my scrubs! He was quite delightful, I even have a picture with him
of course he had no cigars with him.

Sir McTealC and I are doing "inventory" in the broom closet
and don't wish to be disturbed until we can count all the bristles on the broom. Yes it is a tight fit and I am facing forward and McTeal is right behind me making sure I do the right count

Answer 6

You have even the dragon confused on this one.
Slk's can handle McTeal. My worry is can McTeal handle Slk.
I can't figure my own self out much less my own countrymen/women.
If things get too haywire, put all of them in the stall next to Ali, she'll keep them in line.
How about putting some animals into the story line?
By the by: All is well on my home front. We ARC sisters are all ok.

Answer 7

Well, I don't think you have anything to fear if Mr. Clinton checks in alone (now, if a Ms. Lewinsky arrives, please place her in the opposite wing). Mr. Clinton has to keep in check now that Mrs. Clinton is making a run for it. So, I suspect the cigars are being requested for future congratulatory smokes - and I would assume that would be their sole purpose. As Sigmund Freud once said, "sometimes a cigar, is just a cigar."

Answer 8

What pray tell is going on in the kitchen. Has a chef applied for th job yet? It isn't fair all the steam is in the cupboard amongst the brooms and pails. I think I hear someone singing "Hey goodlooking what ya got cooking? Hows about cooking something up with me". Who could it be?

Answer 9

Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!
Hillary has been trying to forget
that for the longest time.
Sounds like this B&B is a
swingin place. I take AmEx,
Visa,mastercard,cash, or even
IOUs. I might even give THEM
a little silver.

Answer 10

Wish I had news to add to the fray. But for now will just enjoy your posting and be appreciative of you keeping us up with the progress.