if someone's sad then he/she likes sad things?

Question

If you are sad or you have a sad personality, then you will like sad things? the same if you are a positive person, a happy person or etc.? I which case it wouldn't apply (if it does)... The more complete and if posible, backed up (studies, books, articles) answer gets the 'best answer' points.

Ok, with 'sad things' i mean, like songs, films, drawings, poetry, speeches, etc... I mean, if you have a sad kind of personality then you will like things that get you to that emotion? the same with a happy personality, or a angry personality, etc.

Answer 1

While your question is very vague, let me attempt to answer. According to the DSM-IV, a possible criterion of Major Depression is "suicidal ideation" or "thinking about death." Do these people suddenly have a drive to watch sad movies? Not really. You see, those with depression really don't like much at all anymore. However, none of that matters.

You see, no one has a "sad personality." Personality is really a longstanding pattern of behavior given particular circumstances. If you have an assertive personality, your behavior likely shows a pattern of assertion to achieve your goals. Having a "sad personality" cannot make sense in this paradigm. People can not behave sad. They can feel sad, and perform behaviors that express this sadness, but is there a behavior in which you can say, "They did that sad" (and not mean sad as a synonym for pathetic)? This is why there is a distinction between disorders of personality (Borderline, Histrionic, Narcissistic, etc) and disorders of mood (depression, bipolar disorder, etc).

Let's instead rephrase your question: "If someone has depressed mood, are they drawn to other things that are sad?" If this is the question, then the old adage applies, "Misery loves company." People who revel in misery often love to find someone just as miserable as they are to share with. Why? People who are miserable do not berate others for feeling the same way - in their opinion, there's plenty of reason to. Happy people often mess this up, and tell the unhappy person, in more or less direct ways, that their thinking is defective, and in turn attempt to bring them to their point of view. While the happy person may believe they are doing the other person a favor, another adage applies: "You can't give help to someone who doesn't want it."

In another vein, we do tend to avoid things/people that do not resonate with our mood. If we are happy, we don't like being around depressed people - it ruins our mood. If we are feeling silly, serious people sure are a buzzkill.

Finally, let us also not make the mistake of assigning universal emotional value to objects/events. What one may consider as devastating, another may see as "everyday." What I consider to be easy may be hard for you, and vice versa. While this movie is scary to my wife, I think it ridiculous. Are these "sad" people really gravitating towards sad things, or do we make the mistake of thinking the things they do are sad because it is they who are doing them? While mowing the lawn in the rain may seem sad in comparison to mowing it in the sun, it's still just mowing the lawn.

Answer 2

That's a tricky question. If I have a sad "personality" and I find a sad movie I like, is the sad movie making me happy? Does that mean I wouldn't have a sad "personality" anymore?
Have you ever waited for a summer blockbuster movie to open up in your area, only to find out after you watch it, that it was a grave dissapointment?
Sometime sad people stay in the sad zone because they find it comforting. "If I allow myself to be happy, someone or something is going to let me down, so I rather just be happy being sad."
Most of the time, it's a battle within the person that has to be settled, but there are a multitude of psychological issues with different solutions or salves.

Answer 3

I don't have any reference material handy, but I rather doubt your statement that sad people like sad things. Sadness is usually caused by certain circumstances or a state of depression. As a rule, people are not normally sad for extensive periods of time. Life works both ways. There are sad times and happy times, and most of us can find a comfortable balance between the two. I'm also scratching my head about "sad things". What are those, if I may ask? Are you speaking of events or objects? "Things" is rather an indefinable word.

Answer 4

There are a lot of people who use self-talk to handle what is going on inside their minds. When self-talk is not monitored cautiously it can lead to drastic effects not only on one’s personality but also affects its mentality and psychology. Self-talk is a type of conversation which we conduct with ourselves. In literature we call it soliloquy. Brain’s reticular activating system never forgets what we repeat again and again. Ironically this system can not recognize what is beneficial to the individual and what is not. Think you can, think you can't; either way, you'll be right- a saying goes like this. Therefore when ever we ‘talk’ with ourselves, we should be cautious, very cautious in fact. There are a lot of audio programs which can help and there are a lot of online books. If I recall there is a book ‘self-talk solutions’ which is every effective in this scenario.

Answer 5

That goes back to the birth of the blues. When the poor blacks in America became depressed and couldn't do any thing about it. they would sing about. It wasn't that they celebrated about being depressed, it was a way of expressing themselves to others. And it lifted their spirits. Then the blues became popular because the rest of us saw ourselves in songs too. It's like being sad or bothered about something we have little or no control over. If we tell someone about it, it somehow makes us feel better. I believe it's our subconsciousness trying to make since of things. Hope this helps.