my husbands ex wife is a nightmare!!?

Question

when my hubby & her were together they had a son.

she & her current hubby make a considerable amt of money.
she stated she's gonna take me to court & come after me for money to look after her son. i'm on maternity leave. wouldn't the courts look at her hubby's financials before mine?

whenever she is mad she freaks at every little thing we do but now she's targeting me. she's pure evil. when she hears we're going through rough times she attacks us financially. we just get by.

trying not to freak out about this. help! advice. comfort.

Answer 1

sounds like a *****.. but im sure everything will work out.. and a judge would definity look to HER husband before yours.. is her son your husbands son? because yah he has to give financial support.. but only if hes willing too or if its needed.. if they are financially stable than idt a judge would screw you over.. just keep faith and dont let that ***** get to you!

stay strong!

Answer 2

Well, if she was pure evil, why did your husband marry her in the first place? Surely there must be some good in her? If you start looking at this from a different point of view, you might actually be able to keep this whole thing out of court, or in the alternative, she might have to pay you! Oh, and I'm a little confused. The question as stated says my husband's ex wife is a nightmare and then you state "now she's targeting me." "Wouldn't the courts look at her hubby's financials before mine?" If you were the wife, the courts would have no standing to come after your income because the child is not yours. However, the courts do have standing to come after your husband for child support. As I understand it the ex-wife's husband is not the father of your son and therefore his financials would have little or no bearing on your husband's paying child support. The boy is still your husband's responsibility.

Now, hardship or if the other husband decides to adopt the son, then your husband would be off the hook. I would suggest you befriend the "nightmare" and be sure not to talk about finances -- yours or theirs -- meaning you don't talk about buying a new car or a new house or getting a raise, etc. Instead you consider the fact that your husband has a child with this woman and the child will be taking stories back to them and bringing them to you. Make sure that you say nothing bad about the boy's mom and just let the boy know what you can do and that you both love him and care what happens to him. Don't respond to the hatred. Instead realize that your husband is a divorcee and that you, too, could become the ex-wife if you don't learn to play your cards right.
Remember the old addage -- You get more with honey than you do with vinegar. Don't impart bitterness to the boy. Make sure that your home is a safe haven and that any stories he takes back to his mom are good ones or at least non-committal and non-aggressive.

Answer 3

She's coming after you for money or your husband? If he's not paying child support, he really should be. But you personally have no financial obligation to pay for her son so I'm not sure I understand what the situation is. I don't think the courts can make child support come out of your personal salary either, only your husband's. Maybe put some more details and be more explicit for your question and you'll get more helpful answers.

Answer 4

Ive never been in your situation before but I have friends who are currently going through the same thing. I do believe that she does not have the power to take you to court for money since you have no blood relation to the child. She is able to receive more money from your husband but only a certain percentage of what he makes a year. If he were to get 2nd job regardless it being part time or not, the courts will then adjust his payments to a higher amount regardless if he were to later quit the job because of the "potential amount" that he is capable of making. If you two wanted to have more money since his ex is taking so much from you two, I suggest he get a 2nd job that pays under the table. Good luck. Sad that theres so many greedy people out there.

Answer 5

Hi. I'm sorry you have to go through such a nightmare.
Anyways, I'd recommend you not to show weakness or fear to that woman, instead of that you need to get a very good lawyer who has experience enough in these kinds of cases. I think child support is usually intended for those women who are single and don't have a job that pays enough to support maintain their children. But if she's living and is married with a guy that earns a lot of money, you can use that in the court to defend your finances.
Good luck.

Answer 6

No, she cannot touch your finances, only your husbands, and that's only if the court sees reason to squeeze more money out of him.
Keep a journal of all the freaky things she does and says. Keep all documents that deal with her and make copies to give to the court, if necessary.
If she takes your husband to court, journals and documents will show she has a pattern of doing freaky things and the court will see that she's a few leaves short of a salad.

As for her son, just be a good step-mom to him. Don't talk bad about his mother to or around him. If he repeats nasty things about you from his mother, gently correct him using phrases like, "She misunderstood. What really happened was..."
Don't talk about finances, or any delicate subjects, in front of him because he will take that information straight to his mother.

Answer 7

Here's the million dollar question - is your husband meeting his financial obligation to his son?

It doesn't matter how much money she has - your husband has a financial obligation to that child and if he has not made it then I don't blame her for being angry.

She cannot take you to court - because you are not legally obligated to pay support. Household income may be taken into consideration but that is it.

Answer 8

Depending on which state you all live in she may or may not be able to come after your money- but since she is married I doubt she'll be able to get your money.
Some states (TN & PA) look at it like this- once you marry someone you are "one"- meaning you inherit eachothers liabilities.
Some states (MS & NY) look at it like this- you had nothing to do with creating those children therefore they are not your financial obligation.

If you happen to live in one of those states that will consider your income you probably won't be burdened because if they look at yours then they also have to consider her new husbands and I'm sure (based on what you said) he makes more money than you do.

Answer 9

It is your husbands income not yours that they look at. She is just threatening you. There are laws about how much money she can get based on his income and that's it. It is a % and she isn't going to get any more.
I wouldn't even discuss it with her. I'd tell her you won't discuss it and if she is sincere then have her lawyer contact your lawyer. Call her bluff or force her hand so she can't beat you over the head with it.

Answer 10

She can't take you personally to court. You have nothing to do with the financials of raising her and your husband's son. Your money has NOTHING to do with it.

She can try to take your husband... I doubt much will come of it. The court will look at her household income and yours and assess the situation.

Good luck.