my husband is deployed and asked one of his close "friends" to look after me while he was gone (cant drive, no friends) at one point his friend texted me that he would want to have my company as fas as physically and wants me to be close to him, i told my husband about it and when he was here on leave the friend came unannounced by to see me (because i never replied again or answered his call) and my husband shook his hand and chatted with him like nothing ever happened. at another point a friend of him ask me in front of hubby why i picked such a loser for a guy and what i want with him and checked me out in front of hubby. he never said a thing to neither one of the guys, just ignored it, i am really offended and feel any guy can hit on me and he doesnt care.
2007-10-05 03:26:19 · 33 answers · asked by not this way 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
of course i told him that i wish he would say something to the guys,but he doesnt and dont give me an answer why. he say it pisses him of too, but why still be friendly?
2007-10-05 03:33:09 · update #1
when you move to a new country,cant drive or work yet you have to depend on who is there and cant make friends, thats for the ignorant person that said get a real life!
2007-10-05 03:35:52 · update #2
Your husband is gay. Kick his @ss to the curb. @
2007-10-05 03:32:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This friend probably knows something that you don't about your husband if your husband did not respond to this. That is the most likely explanation. The friend is trying to show you that you deserve a better man. However, the only problem is that you are still married, and the friend has already indicated that he is interested in sex - NOT YOU as a person. Leave this friend alone as you have been doing, and have a serious discussion with your husband. You deserve the respect of honesty and having your husband defend your marraige.
2007-10-05 03:33:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you go to the FRG meetings at all? If a ride is an issue give them a call and tell them you need a ride, I'm sure anyone of those women would be happy to help out.
But before careful what you disclose to those meeting if you go, and I think you should go, because a lot of those women are just gossips and who cares what they tell other women, it's the fact they tell their husbands and your husband doesn't need his whole unit knowing his business.
And I know that some of your husband behavior can get him a dishonorable discharge, if you know what I mean.
As for your husband being nice to the guy when he was home on leave, I'm sure it didn't even register to him. He was probably still disoriented and couldn't believe he was actually home.
Just tell this "Friend" you don't need his help anymore. And I think driving lessons should be your best first project!!!!!!
Wadda ya think????
xxx
2007-10-05 15:36:24 · answer #3 · answered by Shel 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think the reason you husband shows that he does not care because he trusts you. What you did was right and that made him trust you. Believe me, he'll find some way to get rid of this guy before you know it, but he will do it his way.
I understand why you feel offended because you expected your husband to get crazily jealous so that you know that you matter a lot to him, but you know what, most of the time, guys' jealousy won't show unless they find out by themselves that their wives has something going on with another guy. I don't mean that guys are not jealous though.
In your case, you told him everything and showed him your loyalty, why does him bother to be jealous, right? He totally trusts you at this point and you should keep it this way. If you love your husband, you should ignore the other guy and focus on the happiness between you and your husband. Nothing at this point that you should be offended about and remember, do not test his jealousy in any way. Once he looses his trust on you, you may loose everything.
Got over it and be happy!
2007-10-05 03:44:27 · answer #4 · answered by song bird 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kay. It's probably an ego boost to your guy that other guys are checking you out. Having a woman that other people want can make a man feel really good about himself. So part of the reason he's not saying anything is purely selfish.
The other part might be because he just doesn't know how to say it (shy) or that he doesn't want to piss off his friends.
If it really bothers you that much and he refuses to say anything, its now your time to say something! Put your foot down to his friends, but in a polite way. Take the one that texted you that weird message aside and tell him you feel very flattered that he thinks you're so hot and all, but it makes you uncomfortable when he talks to you like that, and would really just want to stay friends. He'll probably respond with "Oh, well I just kidding!" To which you'll say, "Oh okay! Cool.. I thought you were serious!" And you two will laugh nervously and hopefully he'll back off with the funny comments.
2007-10-05 03:40:13 · answer #5 · answered by Missy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok yeaaa sky shouldn't be calling you a slut because clearly you haven't had sex with him. Secondly, she is right about you not being a good friend you should have known better to not have even entertained him calling you cute. You should have called him out about that the minute he told you that. You need to tell her. You shouldn't have asked this question at all. You know what the right thing to do is. I just think you don't want too. If the shoe was on the other foot would you like her to be responding or acting as you are?
2016-04-07 05:25:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi
you have a big problem. if your husband is asking this friend to watch over you while he is gone and this guy is hitting on you. you must find some why to get rid of him learn to drive and get yourself some good friends (female). there are groups that women of the military whose husbands are gone, can go to for help or friendships you just need to find them and let them be the rock that you need in this time that he is gone. this will get you some support and someone to talk to about the guy. take control of your life as a strong minded woman so that you don't have to be cared for by pervs like him
2007-10-05 03:40:09 · answer #7 · answered by Sonya K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be your husband is blind, or it could be that your husband actually trusts his friends and believes that they are actually paying you very high compliments and respect in a joking manner. The one who asked you why you picked such a loser was paying you a compliment while joking around with your husband. Doesn't sound like he meant to offend. He was hoping to make you all laugh and smile. Get a sense of humor. I'd get along great with your husbands friends.
2007-10-05 03:36:02 · answer #8 · answered by bonnieboobabe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have swam across the ocean to find my frien who hit on my wife. I would have killed him. He might not be a fighter and could be scarred to confront his friend. But you are his wife, and if he can't stand up for you then there is a problem. It's nice to know there is an honest woman who would tell her husband if someone was flirting with her. My wife (of 13 years, 5 kids) was not honest enought to tell me; now were getting a divorce and our family is destroyed!
2007-10-05 04:09:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your story leave out a lot of details.
But you need to ask your hubby why he is so unconcerned about men 'hitting' on you.
And why do you NOT have friends?
Don't you work?
Make friends and get a real life.
2007-10-05 03:31:37 · answer #10 · answered by sasha1641 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know that if a "friend" of my husband did to me what your husband's friend did to you....they would be missing all their teeth.....I would be offended too if my husband didn't stand up a defend my honor and kick the ever loven chit out of someone that had no respect for me.
2007-10-05 03:33:20 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋