My husband has cheated on me. I have had that "woman's intuition" for almost 1 year that my husband is cheating on me. I have found food boxes with address on it that is not ours. I looked up the address and went to see where & who it belonged to. I have seen my husbands car there several times. Finally one night I decided to wait to see if he showed up at the home & he was coming back with her in the car that I bought for him. When he saw my car, he turned around & dropped her off on the corner so she could walk home. I stopped her & talked to her & she claims that she didn't know he was married, which I know was a lie because she has seen me with him on several occassions. When I caught up with him, the first thing he said to me was " Yeah I tapped that ***!" I love my husband, & I put him out for a while. But now I am having a hard time trying to deal with what he has done. I asked him to attend counseling but he won't go & I think he is still seeing her. What do I do now
2007-10-05 03:02:35 · 27 answers · asked by totally ignored 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to ask yourself if you really want to be with someone like that.. If you feel like he is still seeing her then chances are he is. I have been there done that with my ex. My advice, divorce his sorry *** and move on. Thats what I did, but only you can be the one to make that decision.
2007-10-05 03:07:50 · answer #1 · answered by Niki L MLT 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would say if he is not willing to do what you want him to do to save the marriage, he doesn't care if you have one or not. He cheated on you and it could be forgiven but not forgot. I would leave because the relationship will never be the same. If my husband would had said Yeah I tapped that A**. I would had tapped something of his so hard he couldn't tap anything for the rest of his life. He acted as like he was bragging to you. Also he just kept going back, because you saw him there several times. It wasn't like he made a mistake. My question is maybe she is married to because he drops her off down the street, for what reason?
2007-10-05 03:29:49 · answer #2 · answered by bigjuggies79 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
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2007-10-05 05:30:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know this is extremely difficult to deal with at this time, but you have to keep in mind if your husband doesn't want to put forth the effort on saving your marriage, you have to take the very much needed steps to save yourself.
He's telling you he doesn't want to go to counseling, but what is stopping you from going? Either way, if he stays or not, you need to heal.
If he is in fact still seeing the other woman, they are both ok with it b/c it's a fact that you now know so they don't have to really hide and sneak their affair.
Sweetie, from woman to woman, don't lose yourself in this situation that he has created. Gain the strength to move forward, whatever forward may be for you. Seek help for yourself and find out what it is he wants. If he wants the other woman, let them have each other. Less stress for you. You can NOT make someone stay with you or love you. Don't forget to pray too.
Many blessings to you.
2007-10-05 03:32:56 · answer #4 · answered by Karma Eve 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should realize that its only you who wants to make your marriage work. Since he's not showing any signs that he wants to fix things out and ask for your forgiveness then you should end your relationship and get the divorce. I honestly don't like things to end this way with married couples but since he's not fulfilling his promise and duty as a husband, which is to be a loving and faithful one, then the best option now is to separate. You'll find soemone who will love, respect and be faithful to you. Pray for guidance and healing to the Lord. Good Luck! God Bless =)
2007-10-05 03:12:57 · answer #5 · answered by b0e 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When loyalty and trust are gone, there is not much hope for a normal and healthy marriage. Especially if he does not want to make things better. If he is still seeing her or other women, your health may be at risk as well as your integrity.
If you really love him try to convince him again to go to counseling, if he still refuses, you either have to learn to live with it, (which I could not) or you have to walk away.
It's tough, but only you can decide what's best for you.
Good LUck!
2007-10-05 03:10:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you have children?
How important is your marriage?
Has he done this before?
Important questions that need to be asked.
Bottom line is he needs to be confronted. If you really want to save your marriage then you both need marriage counseling. If not, plan your escape, get your things in order, etc then drop the bomb on him.
By the way, I am a moderator at http://cheatinghusbandsforum.com... and cannot do it any longer. If anyone is interested in helping out over there please, please let me know. Email me or leave a message on the board there. http://cheatinghusbandsforum.com...
Good Luck!
2007-10-08 03:05:31 · answer #7 · answered by wulongworld2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband cheated, i have been through and am still going through the hurt. he wont admit it though and that makes it extremely hard. so i have had to try to research affairs myself to try to get some answers. it is always possible to save your marriage even if he is still seeing her. but the fact that he disrespected you so bad by acting like it was no big deal is crazy. i tapped that, WTF. I am sorry i know you are looking for a cut clear answer, thats how i was. but he has to show you love and respect to try to make it work. i think that fact that he said it like that proved he may not be as serious as you are about keeping the marriage.. leave him for a bit at least is what i think.
2007-10-05 03:43:27 · answer #8 · answered by kisses 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Once a cheater always a cheater, i am a male, trust me it wont be the last, only next time he will be more careful, sorry to say this but get rid of him for your own good, it will screw up your life, you will be wondering what he is up to when he is not around. By the way, i have never played up behind anyones back.
2007-10-05 03:10:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
seems like you still want to work it out, I respect that, it takes a lot of courage to do what you are trying to do. But seems like he is taking you for granted, because instead of leaving him you are offering counseling. This guy should appologize to you and kiss your feet, but he is treating you as a doormat. So now you have to stand up for yourself and show him that you are a strong person. Show him the door. This guy is not worth your time, your life and your money.
2007-10-05 03:10:13 · answer #10 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋