2007-10-04 17:45:05 · 16 answers · asked by jen 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sorry folks, he's Indian, not me.
2007-10-04 17:55:18 · update #1
He's Indian, not me.
2007-10-04 17:58:04 · update #2
Not at all. It's stupid. Don't do it. This is your only life. YOU call the shots. Grow up. Get out from under your parents' thumbs.
What else can I say?
2007-10-04 17:48:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is quite normal. Arranged marriages work out good, if you go with the right attitude. Expectations reduce joy. So, the more grounded you are to reality, the better it becomes to adjust and accomodate with a new person.
Be open to it.
You said, in your heart you know its wrong.
Well, if its another person you are in love with, but are getting married in an arranged alliance, I would say STOP.
Give yourself time to come out of the past experience, and then jump into a new one taking full responsibility, and with a smile.
See, everything in life is a waste, if you are not doing it with a smile. So don't let the situation overcome you. You are strong, and you have been through situations worse than this.
Handle this with a smile.
:) take care.
2007-10-05 00:53:22 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Rain 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, since getting conned into marriage before you really know anything seems to be a rather familiar habit with people all over the world, (yes, even in the west, though they don't call it "arranged") I would say it's quite normal. And I think that a lot of people inside these marriages feel the same way about them that you do, so I reckon that's normal too.
My advice? If your heart (or head, or spleen or whatever) is trying to tell you something, listen to it.
2007-10-05 01:04:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I believe that you should not blindly accept everything everyone sets up 4 u if in ur heart u truly dont like it, but u have to give it a chance too...be optimistic. At the same time, if there is a total turnoff to the way the person acts and carries his/herself than stop the process...Remember: At the end, it is ur life not the people who r arranging the marriage..
2007-10-05 00:49:45 · answer #4 · answered by DTR 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only an idiot would comply with this in this day and age.
As the woman you are going to be married to some guy you don't love. After you get married he will take you to the honeymoon room and rape you. You will then be expected to pretend to love him and hope that you eventually do. Because otherwise the rest of your life is going to involve fake loving some stranger, until after a while it just becomes habit.
There is no reasonable justification for this kind of thing in this day and age. So you just need to tell your family it is not going to happen, and if they won't listen you need to leave them and get on with your life alone.
It's a tough decision to make, but it is better than being repeatedly raped by a man you don't love.
2007-10-05 00:49:09 · answer #5 · answered by ZCT 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would not do it. You will be miserable. It is hard to be married sometimes when you are with someone you want to be with and are in love. It will be very hard for you. You deserve to be happy and you need to do what it takes to achieve that. I would assume if your culture still has arranged marriages then you cannot get divorced. Can you live everyday for the rest of your life with this man? Can you have sex with this man and let him touch you and carry his children? Do what is right for you and don't worry about what anyone else says. They don't have to live your life. Good luck.
2007-10-05 00:55:01 · answer #6 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most of our parents have did arranged marriage. In present days/system arranged marriages are more than other kind of marriages. Heart is heart where fraction of God has abode so heart to heart marriage may not be wrong. All parents are more wiser, we may not undermine their considerations and experiences in our own interests. Perhaps in place of mind you are using the term of heart.
2007-10-05 01:04:30 · answer #7 · answered by Honey786 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Marriage is a very important decision in one's life.... not many would agree but I do believe.... I would always say... please nvr compromise with something your heart doesnt agree to... its you and ur decision thats gonna make ur life beautiful as heaven or worse like a hell... but do always think abt all the consequences.. +ve and -ve aspects and then take a decision... against your heart or go with you heart.....
2007-10-05 15:44:09 · answer #8 · answered by Why Me ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how about get to know and spend time with the future spouse before the wedding, maybe after meet him and get to know him you have change of heart, if it does not change your heart think very wisely about the decisions you will make because whatever you decided there will be no turn back good luck!
2007-10-05 00:55:46 · answer #9 · answered by purelle31 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure how to answer, I live in the US, arranged marriages aren't the norm here
2007-10-05 00:49:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋