I can't stop thinking of when my cat will die?

Question

I love my cat to death. I mean really to death. I am so attached and I raised him since he was a few weeks old. He is so smart and loves me like no other. However, since he is getting older (just turned 10 in June) all I ever do (daily) is think how much time I will have left with him. I count the possiblities (years) and figure how old I will be at the time he passes and how can I go on when I will only be about 40 at that time. This is crazy but I just can't stop thinking about it. 3 years ago we were stationed out west (military) and I was brining groceries in our apartment, when about an hour later I wondered where my cat was. I couldn't find him. I looked down the hall and stairs to see if he got out, then asked a young neighbor and she said, "yeah saw a cat and let open the door" I cried for days and days.. he finally came back ONE month later. I was beyond happy. But when he left we bought another cat to fill the void. We love him. But I cannot get attached to him like my other.

Thank you for so many great answers in such a short time. I do want to add that he is an indoor cat. Only once in a while do we let him out on the deck (both cats) but we are always with them and usually just for 10 mins so they get fresh air once in awhile.

I am crying so hard right now. I don't even know how to stop. This is an everyday interference. But I do like the answers about spending time continuing to love him to pieces while he is here, rather than dwell on the inevitable. The 'replacement' cat is a gem and I do love him, but he isn't the same as my baby. He is nothing like him. He is 4 yrs younger then my other one. I don't know, maybe I need therapy. Is this normal behavior? To worry about death so much? Thank you again for all the replies.. I read each and every one.

Answer 1

I'm sorry your saddened about the thought of losing your cat, but as others have already answered, you can't change the inevitable. Cats have been known to live up to 20 years or more, so embrace the moments you have now with both your cats and cultivate from it. You have plenty more years and more wonderful experiences ahead. Be glad for the here and now for cat, and show your cat HAPPY, and avoid displaying the emotions of sadness and grief.

I may be reaching a little far here, but it is a little concerning that you are this worried when it sounds like your cat is in good health and has no immediate dangers. Maybe there was some other traumatic event in your life, or loss of someone near and dear to you that you avoiding, and have not been able to reach closure. You may just be channeling your sadness from something other then your cat. (hopefully this isn't the case)

Be strong and Brave and you will be able to sort through this be Happy!!

Answer 2

Try not to do that. Do this -- take pictures and videos and spend quality time with your cat. Your cat isn't THAT old, in fact most cats will live five years or more from your cats age. You will waste all that quality time thinking about death, and then when your cat does go, you will not have that time to recover. Why think of his death now, when you can enjoy him alive. People do this too often, and they lose out on quality time. You CAN get as attached, just keep in mind his soul will stay with you after he passes. You already love him, let him in so you can look back with joy on what he gave you. I know it's hard when they pass but after the first one you are a little more steeled to it, and understand a little better that there is, while you never get over that pet, a light at the end of the tunnel and a time when you can look back and tell great stories of your life with a beautiful animal. Best of luck!

Answer 3

You really need to get a hold of yourself and realize all the wonderful things you have in your life right now. You have two cats that love you, and you have plenty of time left with them. A ten year old cat could easily live another 5 years, at the very least. I know of cats that live over 20.

I'm sorry to say this, but I feel like I must. You shouldn't be so attached to your pets. Really, you should be more worried about the people in your life. I understand your fears about pets dying (when I was 17 I spent my first weekend ever home alone, and my first cat had decided to swallow radiator fluid and almost died), but I think that a constant worry to that degree is a little excessive.

You need to put things in perspective, and consider getting some sort of psychiatric help if you honestly think that your cat is worth so much of your worry and so much stress.

Answer 4

First, stop the glass half empty mentality. It will take some time to love the new cat, but I'm sure that will happen( cats have a way of sneaking into your heart.) Second, go to the vet and have both pets micro chipped. Third, stop thinking about death, it will only bring you misery. Cats can live for a long time. My aunt had two cats live til 23 years old, and the record holder was 30. Do yourself a favor, live in the moment .Carpe Diem!!

Answer 5

I have had many cats in my life and there are some that steal your heart and leave pawprints there forever. Enjoy the time you have and the memories will always remain. I have had to have two of my favorite cats put to sleep when they were only six and nine years old. Tough decision to make, but I knew it was in their best interest. Still, I cried for days.

I also obsessed over my son's cat that lost a litter of kittens to their dog's playful antics while they were gone. After weeks of feeling bad for the cat (and I wasn't even that close to her), I realized that maybe I had a problem that was surfacing through this channel. Long story short--I saw my doctor and was put on meds for depression. Best move I could have made. Please consider this is things don't get better.

Answer 6

This is a really tough issue.

You can't enjoy the time you have with your cat if you are looking at him thinking about his death constantly, do your best to keep him healthy and enjoy the time you have together. All I can really suggest is to block it out the best you can.

You need to realise that the new cat wasn't a replacement but and addition to your family, no pet can replace the cherished ones who came before them. The new cat will grow on you more and more over time. My advice is deal with the cat's death when he dies, it's not healthy to fixate on death.

There will always be that one special pet that you will love more than the others, it's natural, mine was a horrible little Jack Russell who hated everyone but me! When my first dog died I thought I would never get over it, months later I got my Jack Russell and no one could replace him, I've had 5 pets since him but his still my special boy!

Answer 7

Hi Chris.

Remember you've no idea how long you have with your friend here on earth, some cats live into their 20s. You don't want to spend over half of his life thinking about his death. When your cat does get older if he gets ill, take good care of him as I know you will and have courage to let him go if he is suffering a lot.

I know something of how you feel. I had a miracle cat, a Siamese mix who was severely burned in a huge fire when he was about 1 year old. He was found near death by a kind person who took him to a shelter and amazingly they didn't euthanize him- -he'd already fought so hard to survive. After he spent a long time healing, at first wrapped up in bandages like a mummy cat, ours was the lucky home to get him. This was a wonderful cat! He and I developed a really close bond--I became closer to him than to any other animal of any species I've ever known. When his kidneys began to fail at only age 7, I gave him subcutaneous fluids and meds and did everything I could to keep him going and comfortable as long as I could.... I'd never have thought it possible to become even closer, but we did during that time.

Finally the time came when he was just tired and suffering and although I so hated to let him go, I knew I must set him free from pain. I was devastated. When I took him to be euthanized I cried and cried so much. I thought I'd never be able to love another animal again....

In a few months, though, we adopted two other Siamese who needed new homes. At first I felt guilty for thinking I just might never love them. Now I can hardly believe I thought that- -I found that as time went by I WAS able to open my heart and love them dearly.But this is not going to be one of those stories that ends: "But after a while I was just as close to the new cats." No, my little miracle firecat has a special place in my heart and I think it is very unlikely I will ever again be so close to an animal.

When your beloved cat moves from this life, if it's before you do, it is going to really really hurt. But in addition to human relationships, you will have other great animal friends who will need your care and affection and I'm sure you will love them.

And you'll still feel your deep connection to this cat. For myself, I don't feel my cat is gone away from me forever. Whether one thinks of ones's pets who have died as waiting for us at the Rainbow Bridge or whatever, I truly feel we are still connected and I will see him again someday.

I know you are really dreading this loss which may be far in the future. But deep down, I feel you are fortunate to experience this kind of a strong connection with an animal. The negative side of this is that you are vulnerable to deep sorrow. But would you trade? I wouldn't.

Perhaps with every deep, intense love there is a part of it that hurts because of this. But you shouldn't let the hurt overtake the love. Do what you can to try to fully experience your time with this wonderful creature while your cat friend is here physically with you -- instead of mixing up that experience with the anticipation of grief. With such a rare and deep bond, I think you'll never truly lose him anyway.

If all the answers here don't help, you may want to talk about it with a therapist, or a spiritual leader (who believes animals go to heaven).

Answer 8

I know what you mean. I love my cats so much. When my younger one gets out for like an hour, I'm freaking out cause I'm afraid she won't come back. Death is a part of life, but thinking about it won't make it go away. Plus it depends on the health of the cat. If it is healthy, then I can't see him dying anytime soon. If you keep thinking about how much time you have left with him, then you are wasting the time you could be spending with him. (corny sounding, I know)

Answer 9

Your cat will die. So shall I: so do you would possibly want to. We might want to easily get used to the inevitable. we've had a succession of cats and characteristic had to evolve to their deaths; till they die faraway from residing house and the bodies are lost, we bury them lower than the flowering lilac in our backyard the position they (them enthusiastic about 30 years) have stropped their claws and dozed interior the sunlight. existence may have lack of existence, and there is not any longer something any persons can do about it. Your obsession will in time, pass. I felt a lot an same about my first newborn, were given up 4 circumstances interior the nighttime to ensure he replaced into nevertheless respiratory and so on, besides the undeniable fact that the darkish thoughts diminished after a lengthy time period. He survived, and flourishes - till his time comes. So will your pal the cat. wish this helps.

Answer 10

My cat just turned 20 years old and is still in top shape. You need to quit worrying about something that you can't control. Death is a part of life.
I would think something else is going on in your life, or maybe you're suffering from depression. Seek help, it is not normal to be so obessed with of something that isn't even close to happening.