What should I do??

Question

I have this stepfather. Well, I've had him for like 5 or 6 years now, but he's such a jerk! He's fat and old (15 years older than my mom) and is so annoying/embarrasing/mean/scary. I've told my mom I don't like him, but she's like my best friend and all I want is for her to be happy because she works so hard(my stepdad doesn't even have a job, he lives off her), but I just don't understand what she sees in him. This is really selfish, but he's ruining my life! My friends hate him too and don't call my house phone cause they're creeped out by him(I don't blame them) So what should I do? I don't want to make my mom unhappy, should I just forget about it and live on with my life by counting down the next 3 years until college?

Answer 1

I think that you answered your own question. Just hang tough.

Answer 2

You are me when it comes to dealing with jerk step fathers.
This is what I did. I left school when I was 17, had my mom sign the papers and off to boot camp.

I got my G.E.D. while in the service. You could join the Coast Guard and stay state side without worry about going to Iraq.

You can get your college paid for while in the military. Then if you like the Coast Guard you can apply for Officer Candidate
School and have a great career as an officer. Remember this. You can retire with a great retirement package after only 20 years service. And as an officer is is really nice to have a guaranteed monthly income for life and your not even 40 years old. Remember this. After the baby boomers retire there is not going to be any Social Security for you. Just a thought. something to really consider. You might want to see a Coast Guard recruiter for all the benefits. In any case I feel your pain and good luck !

Answer 3

Well fifteen year old, I have good news for you but you will have to be humble before any of it will make sense! Stop trying to run your mother's life! She's got enough just looking out on your behalf. You are not obligated to like anything about your step-father, life isn't made that way. So he is the things you say, so what! That's his and your mother's business until something effects your well-being and then it's your mother's concern. The friends might be listening to your opinion and not being allowed to derive one of their own. Ask your mother "Politely," what she sees as a virtue in her husband. you may learn something new about yourself. She is your role model and there is a pretty good chance your future relationship will duplicate your mother's.
Volunteer Counselor Western Illinois University

Answer 4

Talk to your mom and ask her if she's happy in their relationship. Tell her you're concerned, and in your opinion, it's not looking too healthy. Tell your mom about your situation and how you feel about it. If there's anyone that guy's going to listen to, it's more than likely your mom. You can't help but make her unhappy, but if you want something done about it, you have to be strong and put your foot down. Tell her how he treats you and how he acts, because she's the only one in this situation that could help. Talking with your stepdad might make it worse, and you won't enjoy talking to that guy.
3 years of torture? This'll only add stress to studying and making it into college.

Answer 5

You said that your mom is your best friend, so be a friend to her and tell her how you feel. I'm a mom and I've "tolerated" certain guys before because I thought my child liked them, or they had something that was good for him. I didn't necessarily love these guys. I just didn't want my child to think that I played around. Talk to your mom and find out how she actually feels about this guy. He sounds like a leech and she needs to be rid of him!

Answer 6

Tell you mom how you feel make sure you tell her how this

guy is effecting you! because you should be her number one

priory in her life your he child man come and go but your

there till the end it sounds like this guy is using your mom

which is no good for her you or him. So simply go up to her

and say mom this man is no good for our life style and he

needs to get off his lazy *** and get a job also tell her how he

is effecting you socially friends are a big deal and they

should never be afraid to simply call you. hope this helps

Answer 7

well no one can explain love. only your mom knows what she herself sees in him. i have the same problem, but with my sister. im not going to get into details; try confronting him and explain what you feel, try one of those family meetings. i really cant help anymore than that, my father left us when i was 2 years old and now 16 years later hear i am- father-less. Best thing to do is just explain how you feel. he may or may not come through but trying never hurts. good luck and email me for any more help!

Answer 8

Bullsh*t. Its your house too, and if he isnt contributing to the finances, then he has even less say than you. Let him know how you feel, and tell him your sick of him scrounging off your mother and acting like a jerk.
Your mom may be your best friend, but you should be her first priority, not the loser who just hangs around and has sex wiith her while she pays the bills.

Answer 9

Sounds like your mom is afraid to be alone..To keep a dead beat loser like that has to be some kind of desperation on her part...he dose not even work ... Tell your mom it would be cheaper to kick him out.. at least your grocery bill would be cheaper....

Answer 10

If you love your Mom then you already know the answer to this question. You should look deep within yourself.

Answer 11

YUP --- stay out of it. Go and visit your friends, after you have done all your homework, and leave your mom to figure out what to do about your stepdad.